Ride on the Magic School Bus! (Teacher Talk)

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Proofreading some speeches on the topic of show+tell/"let me introduce and explain this thing"

This is my bamboo sword. It is used in kendo. When I hit you, you feel sore.

Let me tell you about 「smartphone」.
My smartphone's type is iphone 6s
I bought it when I was in the second year of high school.
I treasure it more than anything else.

Hallo <waving hand emoji I can't post on the forum for some reason> My name is <withheld>

Look at this photo graph

Hello. This is my ring.
I often put it on. this ring is different from <N>'s in color. this makes me feel cheerful. this is my treasure.
Also, <N> is my best friend.
I want to cherish this.
Thank you for listening.

Hello. Please take a look at a plastic umbrella.
I bought it at a convenience store.
This umbrella is very popular among young people.
because, it is very useful.
This umbrella will rise in value in the future.
Thank you for listening.

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First day back at work after winter holidays, caught up with Rad Geography Teacher and mentioned the bf (who I visited over the break) is applying to grad schools including one in Stockholm

He mentions he backpacked through Stockholm instead of going to university because (and my Japanese was definitely not up to par here but I'm 90% sure) he protested against the Vietnam war, subsequently got blacklisted from being hired by most companies, gave up on university because in Japan it's apparently mainly to secure a job as a salaryman, and became a teacher instead

I figured it was only polite to offer a decent story in exchange so I told him how Te Urewera National Park was given legal personhood
It took a crash course in the Treaty of Waitangi via a couple of printed-off wikipedia pages (including one in Japanese) and liberal riffling through a dictionary for him to understand what I was fully on about but he appreciated it

One of the kids I support in class called me Lankie today, followed by 'I subscribed to your youtube channel'

One of the kids I support in class called me Lankie today, followed by 'I subscribed to your youtube channel'

Conveniently I don't have to worry about this now because I just got fired. So, y'know, every cloud has a silver lining and all that.

Damn that sucks Lankie.

Let me tell you about finger
This hand haves five finger
You can express anything with your fing^ers.
① good ② point out ③ fack you ④ marriage ⑤ promise
Thank you for listning

Still one of the finest speeches penned by mankind.

I taught a class of first years for the first time today; there was one boy who's clearly quite good at the subject and contributed a lot in class.

I mentioned my hobbies and stuff in my self-introduction, after class he marched up, brandished a medium-sized eraser, and asked me to make a stamp.

The fact he did this in English to the best of his ability, without prompting, means I'm morally obligated to carve him the fuckin Sistine Chapel if he asks for it. He instead asked for "an anime character, <I haven't thought far enough ahead which>" so that's gonna be miles more managable

So why does every student remember that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell?

So why does every student remember that the mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell?

THIS IS AMAZING. EVERY KID KNOWS THIS.

However, for many, the concept is almost purely word association. Ask them the question in a different way "What organelle provides energy for the cell?" and you'll be faced with a room full of blank stares.

Nevermind trying to get them to recall that cellular respiration is the whole process behind that, and how glucose is an energy source but in a way that is different than ATP and that it's the energy that is transferred rather than any element or molecule.

A fun matching game is to get kids early in the year to label molecules, elements, and organelles. Mitochondria is the powerhouse of the cell but also apparently an element as well.
Every kid is a language learner in Biology.

Oh also we took a break from test review and had our kids make biology raps about said mitochondria and cellular respiration using flocabulary.com tools. It was a blast.

Speaking of 9th grade rappers, I put them on a bit of a time crunch, so some came out a little wonky.

Show Content

Spoiler

ATP puts the beast in me
See the Chemistry
Dependency on Biology
Constantly feel the Energy
Generously remember the memories of the Morgan Freeman documentaries on Organisms
Get your Glucose by eating Groceries

A few came out as Pep-Rally Cheers:

Cell Cell makes Organelles
How can you do it?
I'm about to tell.
In an organism their are cells.
Which have energy to create ATP
Through Mitochondria
One , two, Three
Phosphate

Sadly I also got a few students giving me FANTASTIC COMPLETE SONGS, but turns out I can also do a google search to see where they stole it from. Womp Womp.

Let me tell you about finger
This hand haves five finger
You can express anything with your fing^ers.
① good ② point out ③ fack you ④ marriage ⑤ promise
Thank you for listning

I love this. I wonder if it's worth saying that in JSL (Japanese Sign Language), each finger is represented by a family member. So index finger is sister, middle is brother, and I forget the rest because really I only know that because the sign for brothers is this:

Is it tru that teachers get their smart power by eating homework and then evolving

teachers ARE the homework, don't eat it, don't let your dog eat it.