Ride on the Magic School Bus! (Teacher Talk)

We have a lot of teachers (and many more students) here at eagle time. I think it's a pretty swell and rewarding career and it is one of those topics that you can get me talking about in a lot of detail without much effort.

So lets talk about it! Are you a teacher and had a great lesson or time with your students? Do you need to vent about some BS at school that's made an already demanding job harder? Are you a student and want a preview of what the heck is going on in the mind of the person on the other side of the desk? Chat it up!

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SpoilerIs this an excuse to distract me from getting my grades in? YES. YES IT IS.

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So I had a "differentiated cell model" project for my PreAP Bio students.

Also oh man I can do so much more in class with these kids it is great.

The idea is, they have to pick a unique cell type (no generic "animal" or "plant" cells) and then build a 3d model of it highlighting the structures or organelles inside.

I spent a few hours going through and grading them yesterday, and I was pretty impressed so here they are!

Red Blood Cells:

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This wasn't exactly what I was looking for (none of the mini cakes are labeled, so they lost points for that...but I gave bonus points for tastiness so it all evened out


These guys did some solid research. I got an email asking if they could just put only 2 structures in their model since mature red blood cells vacate most of their organelles to make room for more hemoglobin. I told them NOPE gotta talk about membrane proteins then. So they flagged them on their twizzler membrane.

Ameoba:

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This guy looks like some kind of bizzaro Texas.

Chromatophore:

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This kid just threw whatever junk they could find onto the cell top. I came by while their friends were poking fun at them and said: "Oh hey! Good representation of the cell membrane! It's a really complex system with tons of random structures on it!"

I still took a couple of points off though.

Smooth Muscle Cell:

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The student's model (bottom) Turned out really well and she was very concerned with making sure it would be a good grade. And oh hey, what is that sitting right above it? Oh it is the model I showed to the classroom as an example. hrmmmm.

She did add a cool representation of the muscular fibers though!

Neurons:

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We had some unique (and sometimes misguided) takes on different types of neuron cells. A couple things I was looking for in these models: 1) They roughly represent the shape of the cell they are modeling 2) They are of a single cell 3)Each labeled structure has a 3d representation - not just drawn on.



This guy made his cell-body out of a water-balloon! I got really excited by this because I use the cell/water-balloon analogy a lot in class. (there is a little nucleus-dice floating around in there)

and Hey! there is a little euglena model next to it. (I am a sucker for euglena models).



Oops! Looks like someone drew their model on! I'm gonna have to take off--oh wait--



This isn't drawn at all! The cell body is highlighted and cut paper, the schwann cells are made of yarn and the dendritic connections are little strings and hot glue!! Okay yes A+.



Aw guys, this is why I offered you to show me your models ahead of time. This isn't a retinal ganglion cell - You gotta have the mylin sheaths and dendrites. Aw, and one of the structures you labeled "cone" is actually a completely separate cell, not an organelle of the nerve. Womp Womp.

Photoreceptor:

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Now THIS is what I am talking about! Full 3d, using everyday objects for unique representations of specialized structures, and a cell type that is completely different from your everyday "generic" cell type. This model gets all the points.

Now it might not look like much, but this is where different styles of grading comes into play. Some of my favorite models are the ones that have that extra creativity in them, even if they look simple, there was a student thinking "okay here is a picture I found online, but what can I use to represent this?"

Also, if you're wondering, there is some subjectivity in how I grade this project, but I broke it up into different components to limit how much that subjectivity can influence a grade.

Cnidocyte:

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Cnidocytes are cells whose entire job is to house and shoot a massive stabby venom filled needle. This kid represented this using a styrofoam ball stuffed into a baloon. Blow the baloon up, increase the pressure in the organelle, and POP nematocyst pops out. Good job guy!

Sperm Cell:

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Sperm cells are A-Okay for this project (just, kids be real careful how you search for it) This guy made his out of candy, and was in the same class as the red blood cell cupcakes. He went up to me and said..."Can I eat the candy in my model, now?"

I said, "Didn't you...hot glue the pieces? Don't eat hot glue."

I later turned around to see a flurry of kids ravenously tearing at his sperm cell.


Apparently they took: "Don't eat hot glue." as "Eat everything except for the glued down bits...mostly."

Magnetotactic bacteria:

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Very impressed with this model. 1) I never mentioned magnetotactic bacteria as an option so these kids looked up and chose this all on their own. and 2) It is the only microbe plush I've had made for class in the last 3 years! So impressed.

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Look a few spoilers down and you can see why that might loose you some points.

More models!

Cholera:

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A solid model, and excellent representation of a bacteria you do not want to get on the oregon trail. Or really...anywhere.

Paramecium:

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This kid looked at an image of a paramecium and said: "That kind of looks like a flip-flop." So they cut up a flip-flop and used it to shape their model.


This guy made his own stand for his model!

but what really impressed me was:


Cillia are little hair-like projections on cells so why not represent that with actual hair-like fabric?

You should do that. That was a good idea.

Skin Tissue:

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Tissue is not a cell. It is a bunch of cells together. Students make this kind of mistake a lot actually, but normally I'm able to catch it during the planning phase if they check with me. This student did not check with me.

Goblet Cells:

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Goblet Cells make things (like enzymes and acids) and then secrete them into wherever it is needs them. Some how this cell gave me 2 of the best designed cells I got this year.


This was the biggest model I got this year. About 70cm long. Well constructed.


This one though, was actually baked (which is not something I usually get) This solid little guy will probably last a long time.

Melanoma:

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These guys got a little confused on this project, they signed up for a cancer cell (melanoma was a good one to go for) but they made their model largely about melanocytes - which is also a cell I am a sucker for. I didn't ask for this degree of research and presentation ,which they did a solid job with, I asked for a cell model. Each of those little painted orbs are supposed to represent a different cell structure - so no credit on that at all. Bad grade....but...



That cancer model though!

I made up some bonus points for the extra work they did to balance out the points they lost for not really following the project.

oh uh...and....



I popped the water balloon model when I was putting this one back...woops.

Melanocytes

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Melanocyte is my go-to when a student asks me what kind of cell they should do. They're like the little superheros of skin cells, weaving their protective tendrils to shield their buddies from harmful UV rays...and sometimes they turn into terrible supervillains replicating and taking over the tissue if they themselves absorb too much radiation.

Here are some of my faves:


Pretty standard (actually almost an exact copy of an easy-to-find image of the cell), but it just goes to show how much of a sucker I am for the melanocyte even when made from bubblegum-colored clay that soaked the paper it was set on.



I especially like how this student put it in a diorama of other skin cell tissue, and the little legend at the base makes it just look classy.

Euglenas

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Protists in general are awesome little self-sufficient eukaryotes, but Euglenas are easily some of my favorite of the kindgom, what with their unique shape and photosynthetic nature.


Using one photosynthetic organism to represent the shape and function of another? Good. vgood.



Well this guy is a little boring...that's disappointing. OH WAIT



IT OPENS UP. This is the only model I've gotten that had a full-3d model instead of a cross-section or cut away model. I was very pleased.

There were many more models, but these were probably the most notable.

Now I gotta load up minecraft to see if I can grade the 3d built ones.

oh here was the worst one:

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This was basically the whole model. I even dug around in the playdoh to see if they had labeled something inside but nope. Just broken up green playdoh with no organelles. Sorry folks, bad grade.

schools

I have 50 goldfish in a tub in my apartment. Hopefully they don't all die this year.

Oh gosh I should not have fed these fish. They did not need that food why are they all sideways?

Maybe they are just bloated. Maybe they will be better in the morning.

Oh gosh I should not have fed these fish. They did not need that food why are they all sideways?

Maybe they are just bloated. Maybe they will be better in the morning.

No to be a pessimist, but that sounds like they are near death. All of my gold fish that died have always weakly swam around the bottom on their sides before floating to the top.

Yup. They are dead.

Like 45 goldfish all dead. (5 of them are little survivors though).

When kids come in today and start saying "Where are the goldfish???" I'm going to say "Oh no, today is the day we set up your tanks, we will put the goldfish in there tomorrow." IT WAS THE PLAN ALL ALONG NO GOLDFISH WERE HARMED. (They were all harmed.)

My wife was gone all day, leaving me to my own fish-related devices. When she came back I told her about the fish this was our exchange:

"Did you de-chlorinate the tap water?"
"Wut."
"You need to go to goldfish school."

So apparently putting goldfish in tapwater is like putting a person in a room filled with trace amounts of chlorine gas (and some ammonia too). I mean, maybe they'll survive but its like a 90% mortality rate.


The 50 chirpy crickets I got are all fine though.

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btp you are a scourge, how can one person have killed so many goldfish

OKAY ROUND 2!

I have 60 new fish in a bag, I have added a dechlorinator. I am letting them temperature acclimate to the water temperature. The 5 surviving fish from batch one are eyeing them with suspicion.

On a positive note. The kids were totally fine with not doing the fish part of their project today. They were fully engrossed in putting their bottles together and setting up their cricket homes.

Possibly my favorite part of this lesson is when I open the box of crickets and tell the kids to "okay go ahead and grab one." Somehow they never considered that they would have to touch and hold the cricket in the process of getting them into their bottles.

My classroom is very chirpy.

oh, this thread exists

yeah hi im a substitute teacher now. i work for a school that has ages k-12 so i get shuffled around towards all sorts of age groups and subjects and i love it. teaching elementary is oddly rewarding so if i had to settle on something full-time i would do that.

Welcome to the club gatr!

(It's a good club)

I need an app tp keep track of all the threats I make to students. Post-it notes just aren't cutting it.

tryna get my head around relative adverbs, I just got the hang of relative pronouns in time to teach those last lesson with the second years

(Relative pronouns (inasmuch as I taught em) are who/which/that which add more information to a subject ("fursonas are anthromorphic animal identities which are adopted by people called furries", or "Schazer is a teacher who would never bring up fursonas in an actual classroom environment"), relative adverbs are similar but using when for dates and where for locations.)

Anyway, the textbook is primarily listing examples like:
-This is the city where I lived five years ago
-This is the baseball field where I sometimes played baseball

And I'm getting serious Nickelback Photograph vibes

Pro-tip: If you plan on copying your friend's paper, make sure to delete their name off of the file you turn in.

lol!!

One of my third year students applied to an international college, which conduct their interviews in English as well as Japanese. I was asked to help her rehearse, which ended up in a solid week of staying at school until six pm poring over stock photos and concocting stories and situations for the people therein.

Anyway she came and told me today that she's been accepted! I'm really proud of her and hope America keeps its shit together long enough so she can enjoy doing an exchange over there in a year or two.

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I was doing an activity today with cue cards with pictures of food on them for the theme "ordering in a restaurant". This particular class is full of jokers and generally outgoing goobers so they were having a great time being awful fussy customers at each other.

One group full of hooligans handed the customer his pizza, and the customer stuffed the whole piece of paper in his mouth. Having never in my three years here see a student wilfully destroy a teacher's things I was kind of shocked, but didn't burst into Japanese and settled for telling them "I need that for my next class."

They quickly showed me the intact card and the now-crumpled scrap of paper they'd actually chewed up was a piece of scrap paper they'd prepped.

Sometimes this job is a slog but I love these kids holy hell

Also in both classes I ran today I had to explain with doodles the aurally-negligible but descriptively-divergent difference between "I have a ___" and "I'll have a ____" and it's all PPAP's fault

Fuck that is some quality goofs

In the latest episode of Teaching High Schoolers How To Restaurant:

One group's waiter looms over his customers and says his lines in an ominous rumble, before yelling the order as he gets it to the chef. He then asks them what drinks they'd like but then says they're out of everything the customers ask for. The bemused guests then ask for orange juice, and the waiter asks if they want it hot or iced and for some reason this is when I lose my shit

The waiter then says "sorry we've only got hot orange juice" and some other student, who's not even in this group, yells "excuse me" and asks the waiter for orange juice, is promptly handed it

In another performance, one student switched off the classroom lights, and the chef appears with a cake and waggles a stub of red chalk over it while some other dude (again, someone not part of this group) gets out of his chair and sings "happy birthday" to the customer

Brilliant.

The second year English elective class were away on their school trip to Tokyo and thereabouts last week, so this week we got them writing what their favorite part of the excursion was.

Most of them talked about Disneyland/sea or trying skiing for the first time, and the latter in particular were pleasing because the kids in question were trying more complicated cause+effect in their sentences than they usually would ("once I started sliding, I had a lot of fun").

However, my favorite story of the bunch:

My best memory is when <my friend's> ears hurt and cried, when an airplane lands and takes off.
And then he took me by the hand, because he was afraid of a crash.