Logic Farmer

put up a strawman to scare away crows

You conclude a strawman from your inferenventory. You deftly manuever it to a logical position and firmly plant it in the ground. This will surely keep away pests that would potentially endanger your long-held assumpkins and other crops.

Feed your assumpkins to your donkey, give the remains to u and me

No! You would never risk damaging your precious assumpkins! You violently shake the illogical thoughts out of your head.

attribute some funda-lentils to the air

Plant some all natural boolean logic stalks

You have neither funda-lentils nor trubarbs. In fact, all you have is these assumpkins, a strawman, and some salted earth. You wonder how you could possibly be a Logic Farmer without any actual crops or seeds. It's as though any illusion of a pre-adventure existence has been vulgarly dismissed.

You violently shake the illogical thoughts out of your head.

You'll need to acquire such things before continuing your farming.

Head on down to the conjunction and get yourself some oars.

You make your way up to the Conjunction by the river junction. Here you can trade for important Logic Farming Implements such as seeds and oars.

Logic Farmer: Howdy there, Conjunction!
The Conjunction: And you, Farmer. Your business?
Logic Farmer: Well shucks, you're not much for pleasantries are ya?
The Conjunction: ...
Logic Farmer: Well, I was thinking since I'm a logic farmer and all, I oughta have some seeds and tools and what-have-ya. Maybe some funda-lentils to attribute to the air? How 'bout it?
The Conjunction: And what would you offer in trade?
Logic Farmer: Aw c'mon now, Connie! We're neighbors!
The Conjunction: ...
Logic Farmer: Well, I got this hat!
The Conjunction: And what would I do with such a filthy thing? No, it's clear to me you have nothing of value.
Logic Farmer: What do ya reckon I oughter do, then?
The Conjunction: You and your hat should get as far away from me as possible. Maybe you'll find some seeds elsewhere.
Logic Farmer: Hey, there's an idea! Where do you reckon I oughter head, Connie?
The Conjunction: I hate you.
Logic Farmer: Hmm...

You think carefully about nearby locations. Their names are on the tip of your logical tongue!
>_