The Garrulous Urgency (Round 1: Rocky Falls)

A battle to the death? Really? The first time we've seen anybody in ages, and we have to kill them?

I don't like the thought of "killing" them, though... Some of them aren't even people...

Pfeh, I'm sure we could manage it if we had to. They wouldn't hold a fight to the death where one of the contestants was unkillable.

What do you think will happen if we win?

I have no idea. That... thing... the Beast, was it? He didn't really say anything much, other than introducing us. But if he was capable of teleporting us here against our will, he must be much tougher than he looks.

Will he just send us back home when it's over? There isn't really anything left there...

Yeah. I don't know what to do after that... Maybe we could get down to the root of this competition. Find out why it's being done. We will have to learn more about each of the contestants, and find out why they were brought here.

That sounds kinda complicated.

The first step, it seems, is to make alliances. There might be a way to break this system, and even if there isn't, we'll be in a better position to fight. We should ally up with someone sane and reasonable. But most of the contestants were advertised as deadly to some degree.

But... not all of them, right? I mean, there's that tennis player, and wasn't one of them just a seed?

The seed won't do. Too unpredictable. But... the tennis player... he is the one most like us. He'll do.

Alright.

Les Jambes and Les Yeux had been sitting back to back, contemplating the game as a whole, and using their telepathy to converse. But, it was time to move out. Les Jambes picked up, and looked around briefly. They were in a clearing some distance away from the hole-ridden cliffs, and they were surrounded by spindly fir trees. Les Jambes walked over to one, and effortlessly plucked it from the earth.

"This will do, eh?"

"Yeah, yeah, let's get going."

Les Yeux dourly looked at his brother, then slowly crawled into the harness at his back. There, he would sit and observe, while directing Les Jambes around. It was the way they had travelled for... how long was it now? He couldn't remember. Either way, it seems that that journey was at an end. After this, nothing would be the same again. Les Jambes started walking towards the cliffs, and Les Yeux closed his eyes, and projected his vision towards a fixed point in the sky, where he would be able to observe all.

Okay. I think I see someone along the base of the cliff. I can't quite make who it is out, but-

rumble

What was that?!

Brother?

I can't see anything!

get off me

Les Yeux opened his eyes and gasped. He was already starting to sweat, and he had a massive headache. He groaned, and closed his eyes, massaging his temples. Of course. He had forgotten all about Urur. The Beast had claimed that it was... well, the sky itself. This one would be tough. He no longer had the sky to himself.

Brother?

There is a contestant in the sky. He will not let me see anything while I am up there. For now, just go to the base. We'll figure things out from there.

Okay, brother!

It was a bit of a walk, so Les Yeux used this chance to rest.

---

Upon arriving at the base, Les Yeux woke up and yawned. It was quite a short nap, but it was enough to relieve his headache.

Where to now, brother?

Hmm... he supposed it would be fine to use his power, as long as it didn't touch the sky. He closed his eyes again, and projected his vision towards the cliff. He was able to see more, but it wasn't perfect. It was enough, though, as he could see that the contestant he saw from the sky was Michael Richardson. He was a bit concerned, as the Beast had said that he suffered from delusions, but he seemed totally harmless otherwise. Perhaps he could glean information from this Michael.

Go that way. He's not far.

Okay.

They followed the wall until they heard thumping noises. Just up ahead, the seemingly meek businessman was furiously punching the wall and shouting.

"Damn that Beast! Damn him to the deepest reaches of Inferno!"

Just as the wall was starting to become quite bloody, Les Jambes jumped in and restrained Michael.

"Grr. Who has the gall to restrain me this time?! First the Beast rips me from my throne, then you...!"

Suddenly, he went limp, and his eyes became unfocused. Les Jambes set him down gently, then he leaped up, and clasped his hands behind his back, and put on a smug face.

"Hmm. So, it was one of those squishy humans, after all, huh?"

"Wh- what are you talking about? You're a human, too!"

"Hehehe. Or so it would appear. I have put on a glamour, in order to blend in better. In fact, I am the One and Only Emperor Deathclaw."

"But-!"

Brother. Please play along with his delusions. I know it's not healthy for him, but we need him to cooperate.

"Oh, um. Oh! I am so sorry, Emperor! Please forgive me! I will do whatever you wish!"

Pushing it a little there.

But Michael was totally and utterly fooled.

"It is no concern. I have expected this. Now... you will tell me who you are."

"O Humble Emperor, I am, uh, Lester. Yeah, Lester Jambalaya."

Really? That's the best you could come up with?

"Lester. Yes, it is fitting. How would you like to be my most loyal servant, as we go and teach this Beast a lesson?"

"It would be my greatest honor! Thank you so much."

"Easy. I may be tyrannical, but I am not foolish enough to pass up a loyal servant. Now then. It is my ambition to kill all the others who desire a pass at this throne of mine. We will move on. Into this hole!"

"Uh... okay."

Even Les Jambes could tell that this guy had a screw loose. Michael didn't appear to recognize him as a contestant. He also appeared to be oblivious to the fact that he was carrying a huge tree. Speaking of which, it wouldn't fit in the narrow tunnel ahead, so he snapped it into half. He knew that Les Yeux was planning to manipulate Michael mercilessly, but the guy was just so pathetic, he felt a little bad. But his brother knew more than him, and he remembered that he was in a fight to the death, after all. He shivered. He wasn't sure if it was due to the cold temperatures in the tunnel, or due to the nature of this game.