Re: Text Adventure Death Game
11-01-2011, 10:39 AM
"Eurgh. I can't believe you just pulled the old 'last-of-my-kind-time-to-off-myself' chestnut."
Guy whimpered a bit as I affixed him with my best condescending glare. I sighed, tossing his manuscript and hopes and dreams aside.
"Really, I get pulp like this all the time from all manner of novices trying to be original, and please don't take this too personally, Mr Guy," I continued, pulling a revolver from my desk drawer, "but we are a respectable publishing house. In the interests of furthering literary enlightenment everywhere, I'm afraid I can't leave a tripe-spewing philistine like yourself alive."
I smiled a bit. "Any last words, sir? If you manage a single nugget of insight, we might get a sub-editor to posthumously edit you into our next critically acclaimed novel. Without crediting you, but that was a given."
"Uh- uh, I think you committed a cardinal sin of writing, yourself!"
"Oh?"
"Blatant self-insertion."
I reflected upon that for a moment, then nodded slowly and put the gun to my own temple.
"Well played, sir. Well played."
> Be hoist by your own petard.
Guy whimpered a bit as I affixed him with my best condescending glare. I sighed, tossing his manuscript and hopes and dreams aside.
"Really, I get pulp like this all the time from all manner of novices trying to be original, and please don't take this too personally, Mr Guy," I continued, pulling a revolver from my desk drawer, "but we are a respectable publishing house. In the interests of furthering literary enlightenment everywhere, I'm afraid I can't leave a tripe-spewing philistine like yourself alive."
I smiled a bit. "Any last words, sir? If you manage a single nugget of insight, we might get a sub-editor to posthumously edit you into our next critically acclaimed novel. Without crediting you, but that was a given."
"Uh- uh, I think you committed a cardinal sin of writing, yourself!"
"Oh?"
"Blatant self-insertion."
I reflected upon that for a moment, then nodded slowly and put the gun to my own temple.
"Well played, sir. Well played."
> Be hoist by your own petard.
peace to the unsung peace to the martyrs | i'm johnny rotten appleseed
clouds is shaky love | broke as hell but i got a bunch of ringtones
eyes blood red bruise aubergine | Sue took something now Sue doesn't sleep | saint average, day in the life of
woke up in the noon smelling doom and death | out the house, great outdoors
staying warm in arctic blizzard | that's my battle 'til I get inanimate | still up in the same clothes living like a gameshow
clouds is shaky love | broke as hell but i got a bunch of ringtones
eyes blood red bruise aubergine | Sue took something now Sue doesn't sleep | saint average, day in the life of
woke up in the noon smelling doom and death | out the house, great outdoors
staying warm in arctic blizzard | that's my battle 'til I get inanimate | still up in the same clothes living like a gameshow