RE: The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5
12-07-2022, 12:32 PM
>The not so loyal audience members speak to the stand in.
>"We would like to say how grateful we are that you came all the way out here to fill in for and protect our wise and generous narrator."
>"It can't be understated what an honor this is."
>"We'd like to bestow a token of our appreciation."
>"Several tokens. Would you like to have a seat in this un-suspicious chair?"
>"Care to have a sip or two of this warm drink that hasn't been tampered with?"
>"You'd look so dapper with this tie on. Don't worry about taking it, I have more."
. . . .
>Adler: You slowly lower your arms as your dramatic flair deflates. The wind has been completely taken out of your sails as you sullenly scowl at the old crone. Your eyes shift to the rest of the coven, they are watching you expectantly. Your eyes go over to Rebecca, she is smiling broadly and nodding enthusiastically. You may as well finish what you started. With a weary sigh you look back at the old opossum and reach out with elf mind. You speak in a very unenthusiastic, non-committal way. "And you, you are guilty of-"
>Old Possum Lady: "No-no! Please do the voice."
>Coven: Yes, the voice was cool.
>Rebecca: Pleeeeeaaaaase!
>Adler: You groan in frustration. Fine, sure, why not? *Deep Breath* "AND YOU!!" *some of the coven begin clapping* "You spend every waking moment stewing in jealousy and thoughts of revenge! You would learn witchcraft to infuse dark magicks into food so you can cheat at baking contests!" You drop the voice. Wait, that's it? Really?
>Old Possum Lady: Not just that! You'd also whip up a hex so that hussy would never be able to bake a decent pie ever again! Every time she'd try to make a sweet pie it'll turn out sour and if she tries to make a sour pie it'll turn out sweet! You cackle maniacally. Ever since SHE moved in you've only come in second place; every contest, every festival, every holiday, and every spontaneous bake-a-thon your hometown is famous for. You were the rightful star baker, and then she just waltzed in and stole your title! The whole ordeal drove you to near madness, so you built a shack in the wilderness and spent years living life as a hermit, plotting witchcraft based revenge.
>Coven: Urge your elder to calm herself, lest her heart begins acting up again.
>Adler: As the coven fusses over the old possum, you stare at them in bewilderment. That was a grade-A performance! Any lowfolk who saw that should be groveling by now. Instead they're all acting like they just saw a street magician. What gives? You ask out loud why they weren't brought to their knees in fear and awe.
>Rebecca: Oh! You gush happily as you explain. Randall doesn't need to worry about that. Some of them were worried about coming out here after you were attacked, but you told them that he wouldn't let anything bad happen to them. You told them all about how Randall is the nicest, sweetest, most generous, and most seelie elf ever! He is a charming and sensitive soul, and a big romantic. When he talks to Miss Vernier, it's the cutest thing ever! You explained how he helped save you from yourself out of sheer benevolence, meticulously teaching you what it means to be seelie and the loving aura of Lady Fuma. The coven has nothing to fear from Randall as he will accept them all with open, loving arms. You also told them that He was putting a show together so it would be rude not to go. And that show did not disappoint!
>Alder: Why did she tell them all that??
>Rebecca: You beam proudly as you say, "It's Seelie to be honest."
>Burnside: You double over in helpless laughter as you hear this.
>Adler: You facepalm. You know, it really should have occurred to you to give Rebecca a script.
>"We would like to say how grateful we are that you came all the way out here to fill in for and protect our wise and generous narrator."
>"It can't be understated what an honor this is."
>"We'd like to bestow a token of our appreciation."
>"Several tokens. Would you like to have a seat in this un-suspicious chair?"
>"Care to have a sip or two of this warm drink that hasn't been tampered with?"
>"You'd look so dapper with this tie on. Don't worry about taking it, I have more."
. . . .
>Adler: You slowly lower your arms as your dramatic flair deflates. The wind has been completely taken out of your sails as you sullenly scowl at the old crone. Your eyes shift to the rest of the coven, they are watching you expectantly. Your eyes go over to Rebecca, she is smiling broadly and nodding enthusiastically. You may as well finish what you started. With a weary sigh you look back at the old opossum and reach out with elf mind. You speak in a very unenthusiastic, non-committal way. "And you, you are guilty of-"
>Old Possum Lady: "No-no! Please do the voice."
>Coven: Yes, the voice was cool.
>Rebecca: Pleeeeeaaaaase!
>Adler: You groan in frustration. Fine, sure, why not? *Deep Breath* "AND YOU!!" *some of the coven begin clapping* "You spend every waking moment stewing in jealousy and thoughts of revenge! You would learn witchcraft to infuse dark magicks into food so you can cheat at baking contests!" You drop the voice. Wait, that's it? Really?
>Old Possum Lady: Not just that! You'd also whip up a hex so that hussy would never be able to bake a decent pie ever again! Every time she'd try to make a sweet pie it'll turn out sour and if she tries to make a sour pie it'll turn out sweet! You cackle maniacally. Ever since SHE moved in you've only come in second place; every contest, every festival, every holiday, and every spontaneous bake-a-thon your hometown is famous for. You were the rightful star baker, and then she just waltzed in and stole your title! The whole ordeal drove you to near madness, so you built a shack in the wilderness and spent years living life as a hermit, plotting witchcraft based revenge.
>Coven: Urge your elder to calm herself, lest her heart begins acting up again.
>Adler: As the coven fusses over the old possum, you stare at them in bewilderment. That was a grade-A performance! Any lowfolk who saw that should be groveling by now. Instead they're all acting like they just saw a street magician. What gives? You ask out loud why they weren't brought to their knees in fear and awe.
>Rebecca: Oh! You gush happily as you explain. Randall doesn't need to worry about that. Some of them were worried about coming out here after you were attacked, but you told them that he wouldn't let anything bad happen to them. You told them all about how Randall is the nicest, sweetest, most generous, and most seelie elf ever! He is a charming and sensitive soul, and a big romantic. When he talks to Miss Vernier, it's the cutest thing ever! You explained how he helped save you from yourself out of sheer benevolence, meticulously teaching you what it means to be seelie and the loving aura of Lady Fuma. The coven has nothing to fear from Randall as he will accept them all with open, loving arms. You also told them that He was putting a show together so it would be rude not to go. And that show did not disappoint!
>Alder: Why did she tell them all that??
>Rebecca: You beam proudly as you say, "It's Seelie to be honest."
>Burnside: You double over in helpless laughter as you hear this.
>Adler: You facepalm. You know, it really should have occurred to you to give Rebecca a script.