The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

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And with the complete archive at https://adleryoung.tumblr.com

find out that the two inbred idiots are not talking about you, but none other than Glenholm Webb.

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"You're right, Bodb, buddy," Matholwch whispered, even though I hadn't heard Bodb say anything. "We best not disturb Aunt-Momma til we know for sure which meddlin' scallywag it is. Now play it cool, an' don't let on you know he's here. Who do you figure it is? Glenholm Webb, or Estvan Silverbrush?"

>Adler: You've had your fair share of maneuvering through politicking machinations, this should be second nature to you. Tell the two to hold on for a moment and cut a deal.
Adler: Become very, very annoyed
Adler: Start mouthing off at the two inbred hicks

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"It's neither of them, you morons!" I yelled. "This is Prince Adler, and I can't believe you've been here this whole time, setting up businesses and making yourselves comfortable while I'm trapped in Albric Tor just a few miles away!"

"Oh," Matholwch stammered. "Well, the thing is, we didn't think -"

"That's right, you didn't think!" I berated him. How dare he? "Never mind that it was due to my actions that you lot are free, and you owe me a huge favor, the hugest you've ever owed anyone, EVER. You idiots are too dumb to fathom what that kind of responsibility entails. You wouldn't know common elvish decency if you turned around and stubbed your toe on it! Even if it were possible to somehow combine the two of you, you'd still have less than half a brain! You boys are useless, absolutely useless! Where is the Duchess? I need to talk to an adult!"

Matholwch: Start crying, years and years of bottled up emotions finally break from the mental Dam.
Bodb: Protect your brother, but also cry, you try to hold it back but Adler can see through your sniveling face.

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To my amazement, Matholwch began to cry. He clutched his brother-cousin for solace and blubbered up toward me, "TH-THAT AIN'T NICE, YER HIGHNESS. YOU D-DON'T GOTTA BE SO MEAN. ME AN' BODB CAN'T HELP IT."

"Oh come on, you big baby," I scoffed. "I've heard the Duchess say worse things to you."

"AUNT-MOMMA DOES IT CUZ SHE LOVES US," Matholwch wailed. "WHEN YOU SAY IT, IT JUST SOUNDS UGLY."

"What in tarnation is all that ruckus?" a familiar voice called from another room. "Are you boys CRYIN'?? What in the Netherhells is a-goin' on in there?"

"P-PRINCE ADLER IS SCRYIN' ON US AN' SAYIN' THE AWFULEST THINGS, AUNT-MOMMA, MA'AM," Matholwch sobbed.

"HE WHAT???" the Duchess bellowed.

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Suddenly a terrific Magickal force pushed me back, out of the foundry, out of Percysthorpe, and all the way out of the tree-shaped crack in the scrying tower's scryspace.

I lay on the floor for several minutes. I felt dizzy and my head was throbbing.

What just happened?