The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

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>MacBrock: Scoff at the opposing army! They skipped meals? There's absolutely no chance they can be battle ready after starving themselves.
Adler's army, be woefully unprepared.

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"TIS NAE REEGHT," MacBrock bellowed indignantly. "ATTACKIN' ERE THE LAST MEAL IS SARVED. CRAZED, PITIFUL STRATEGY FRAE TH' MARHAL. THEY'LL NE'ER MEK IT DOON T'US LADS ON EMPTY STOOMACHS, FEAR NOT."

>Burnside: You've had dreams about this. Finally, an opportunity to disembowel people en masse consequence free. The opposing army shall witness horrors they could have never conceived of in their darkest nightmares.
(Burnside) Continue to yell threats.

"GIT ON YORE FEET, YA LAZY SCALLYWAGS," Burnside yelled. "That there opposin' army ain't foolin' and neither am I. I'm a-comin down thar, and any yall what ain't ready to move is gonna hafta deal with me!"

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With that, she vaulted over the railing, and sounds of mayhem erupted from my army's camp.

(Vulpsmarschal Sweetcheeks) Demonstrate precisely how skilled you are with the morningstar.
(H.M. Queen Edessa) Begin weaving a particularly ornate and complex set of South Country magicks.
Theronmyathus, decare Adler to be a traitor to the kingdom and your intent to kill him. Preferably quickly and brutally. Unless he surrenders, in which case he'll get a fair trial before being killed quickly and brutally. Accuse Adler of a number of crimes, many of which had absolutely no connection with him.
Vulpsmarshal Sweetcheeks, declare Adler to be an enemy of the Vulpitanian Republic.
Avogadro, come to the front line. Accuse Adler of kidnapping his beloved vixen.

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"The enemy is making aggressive movements!" Theromyathus screeched. "Form up in battle lines! Elite Shrubs to the front! On my command, we advance, to bring justice to the arch-traitor Adler!"

"Doomer of Kings!" Edessa added, as she began to weave some scary-looking magick with her battle staff. "Corrupter of Floozies!"

"Enemy of the Vulpitanian Republic!" Vulpsmarshal Sweetcheeks declared, as he twirled his morning-star above his head. "Spoiler of pies!"

"Spoiler of beautiful & virtuous vixens!" Avogadro shrieked angrily as he pushed his way to the front of the ranks.

>Adler: The top of the tower is a good place for you to be. It's a defensible position that let's you oversee the battle in a good sniping spot and easily shout commands from above. You should try taking out the commanding officers to leave them without direction specifically Theronmyathus and Sweetcheeks because they're jerks. Maybe use burning arrows on the shrubs if you got any.
>Adler: Pesky seelie thoughts keep creeping into your head. Have a morale quandary about killing the queen. On one hand, she's a self-serving, unseelie shrew of a woman who played a part in your brother's death. On the other hand, she's pregnant with your brother's only child. Do you really want to stamp out the only legacy he was able to leave?

"You'd best stay here, Your Majesty," Ms. Thomson advised me.

"I should be down there, leading my men into battle," I protested.

"You are too important to risk," she countered sternly. "I will co-ordinate the attack. You must remain here in this elevated vantage where you can survey the field and shout orders. Use your bow to pick off strategic targets. Aim for ranking officers. And dodge any shots that come your way. Good luck, and I hope to speak with you again when the battle is over."

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Thomson bounded down the stairs and left me alone on the tower porch. I nervously drew my bow and watched the two armies advance toward each other. Theronmyathus' troops were orderly and disciplined. My own forces looked like a disorganized rabble, shambling forward only because Burnside was jabbing them in the back with sharp objects.

I thought that perhaps if I shot Theronmyathus, this would end quickly with the Albric Tor defenders routed in confusion? Or, more likely, Avogadro or Sweetcheeks, or perhaps even Edessa, would assume command if the eagle fell. I felt less qualms about shooting the mole or the fox .. but could I shoot the Queen? She had conducted herself in a manner bordering on Unseelie through all of this, but still - she was pregnant with Estmere's child. Estmere's semi-lowfolk, half-scuti child. And furthermore, what kind of femme was she, to be fighting in her condition. She had been out for my blood since before Nidab & Semos came. Perhaps she needed to be stopped...

I slowly nocked an arrow and raised my bow.