The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

Adler >Look away from the duchess! That was a Super High level wile you where not expecting from her. Make it look like you turning away in thought "oh hmm er let me thing about this!"

I looked away from the Duchess, to avoid the powerful Wiles she was attempting to use on me, and muttered something like "hmm, tough decision."

>Though it would be equivalent to getting cozy with a rabid animal that has a chainsaw for a head, Burnside would still be safer than the duchess.
>Sleeping with Catherine is a super bad idea. also could lead her taking advantage over you and sire a devil spawn
> Burnside is the safest option but expect to be bitten a lot
>Consider spending the night with Duchess. Shrink.
> Consider spending the night with Burnsides. Shrivel.
>Choose ...both. .No really, hear me out. CoD can probaly stop, Burnside from getting too psychotic, and that in turn will distract her from getting too flirty with you.
(HSH Prince Adler) Pick the Duchess. After all, she's your rank, station and species.

It was a tough decision indeed! Duchess Catherine was certainly more attractive (from a safe distance) than Burnside, but on the other hand she was potentially infinitely more dangerous. Would I rather be bitten and stabbed to death, or cursed for all eternity? This was no choice at all!

>The most neighborly thing you can do is to give her and her underlings the shack while you sleep outside. Probably under a rock. There, you win. PERIOD. Better than the alternatives.
Leap aside and run into the night howling like a madman!

I was tempted to simply dash away and run screaming into the forest, but it would be unworthy of a scion of Irenaeus to retreat in the face of danger! This situation called for bold, strategic subterfuge!

"I'm not going to have time for sleeping tonight," I announced sternly so that everyone could hear. "Her Grace and I have important matters to discuss. The rest of you may divvy up the Station however you can .. but I warn you, there isn't much room, and the skeleton at the desk will scream if disturbed."

Alice, mara and ratso > Have a big pimped out traveling wagon with sleeping compartments. (the elf equivalent of a RV) How did everyone not see it? ant wagon pullers go "Gronk!"

"We've got a nice wagon to relax in," Alice Chetsweeks explained. A muffled GRONNK from somewhere off on the other side of the Station seemed to corroborate her statement. "If we're all retiring to quarters, then the three of us will go there."

"So long, suckers," Ratso guffawed. "Thanks for the ham."

Adler > Before you release the maiden to COD ask what she will do with the maiden?
Fifi, offer to defile the maiden yourself.
Gertrude, try to get the Duchess to repair Jack.

"I have a home of my own, not too far from here," Gertrude sniffed. "There's no reason for me to hang around, as long as I have Her Grace the Duchess's assurance that my Jack will be repaired."

"My elves are on their way to collect Jack and the maiden," Duchess Catherine said. "They'll get him back to you in workin' order in two shakes, don't you fret none, sugar."

"Wait a second," I interrupted. "What exactly are they going to do to the maiden?"

"Don't reckon I should tell you, cause you'll just get all in a tizzy about it," Catherine sniffed.

"I'm not going anywhere til the Breaker of Ill Winds violates me!" the maiden insisted.

"Don't you worry, hon," the Duchess grinned at her. "You'll get violated plenty where you're goin."

"I'll like, keep her occupied while we wait," Fifi offered.

"Unhand me, Frost-Biter! I answer not unto thee!"

I didn't like this, but there were just too many things to think about right now. "SIMMER DOWN!" I ordered the maiden, sternly. "Go with Frost-Biter and submit to her as you would to me." Her eyes got very wide, and she quietly let Fifi lead her back into the Station building.

"I wanna see how this turns out," Burnside chuckled as she strolled in after them.

Adler & Catherine> get down to business, discusses the possible out come of the child
<besides let's be honnest you weren't gonna get any sleep this night anyway, you gotta some serious plotting to do
(HSH Prince Adler) Take a generous belt of aqua vitae first, though.

"Give me a slug of that Usquebaugh," I sighed as I pulled up a rocking chair and sat down wearily. "Then let's talk about whatever it is you came to talk about."

Duchess Catherine produced two earthenware tumblers from her elfintory, handed me one, and poured a generous amount of Usquebaugh into each before placing the jug on the floor and sitting down in another rocker across from me.



"You just relax, Adler honey," she crooned, patting me reassuringly on the knee. "Everything's gonna work out just fine. Now that them Vulpy thaumaturgists have un-elfed Estmere, the throne is technically unoccupied. All you gotta do now is physically remove him from it. Events have been set in motion that can't be reversed, so there ain't no point frettin' about it. There's gonna be a rebellion now, because the sitting Emperor is unfit to rule. You're gonna win the conflict because you're the true Irenaeid descendant, and I'll be helpin' you. Then you'll be in position to fix the Mistake, either by dissolvin' the Empire, or takin' the crown with me as your Queen. The choice'll be yours."

"But what'll happen to Estmere and Edessa and their child?" I asked.

"Who cares?" Catherine shrugged. "Estmere is a hundred percent lowfolk now, so he ain't important. Their baby'll have zero claim to the Imperial succession no matter what it turns out to be. Edessa I don't reckon will be much of a problem. Even if for some reason you don't manage to kill her, she'll have to come past me to get back to Caer Adland."

"I'm not going to kill Queen Edessa!" I exclaimed.

"Sugar, you can't afford to be so sentimental," Catherine chuckled. "She done tried to kill you twice already, and it's a sure thing she'll try again."



"Forgive the interruption," an Ixie blurted out as she landed on my shoulder. "Some visitors to see thee, Sire."

The Ixie's presence reminded me of something Ratso had said.

"Did you give the SALVs' gem to that white Scuti from their lab?" I asked.

"Not I, Sire."

"But one of your sisters did, right?" I demanded angrily. "I gave that to you for safekeeping!"

"We never promised to keep it nor return it to thee," the Ixie shrugged. "Our duty to the Sisterhood takes precedence over all but an immediate threat to thy safety."

"I am extremely displeased with you right now," I growled sullenly.

"I shall try to endure thy displeasure, Sire," the Ixie sighed with a halfhearted approximation of regret. "But right now thy new visitors require thy attention."



I got up and followed the Ixie around the veranda to the front. There, in the dim dawn light, I saw a trio of armed elves standing on the lawn.

"Hail, Adler the Second," the rat yelled, waving his sword. "True scion of Irenaeus and rightful King of Faerie!"

"AYE," the badger bellowed. "WE'LL CLEAR YON LOWBLOOD RUBBISH FROM T'THRONE AND GET 'EE YER PRETTY WEE CROON AND EE'L SAVE US FROM FUMA'S WRATH AND YON GAPS."

"My bow is at your service, Lord," the capped and cloaked elf stated quietly, with a polite nod.

"What in the Netherhells is this," I whispered to the Ixie.

"Tis thy army, Sire," she answered. "This is but the vanguard. More of thy supporters are on their way hither from all parts of Faerie."

Adler, have an urge to drink as much usquebaugh as possible to reduce your stress.

I tipped my head back and drained my glass of Usquebaugh, but when I looked again, the three rebel fighters were still there.