Business Magnate

We will have the master switch for all butts worldwide, yes?

Yes. It's not going to be so much a switch as an app, though.

Can it drive my car?

Only if it's self-driving, or if you sit on the wheel.

How long is the warranty

Hey, that's your department!

I think 3 months, and triple price for 6 will do.

Brother, I thought your department was the legal department!

Fine, fine. What do you suggest?

Nobody ever buy the damn warranty, anyway. I say, three hundred dollars for a 2 days return policy.

>any plans to take over the wifi, and then conquer the world with prosthetibutts

Ha ha ha ha ha! Not with just prosthetic butts... Let's just focus on one body part at a time.

Can it get mobile data?

Yes, it connects to your phone and you can even take calls with it!

You are not thinking big enough. You could charge a subscription for wifi access.

...Yes, of course. That's why you're the money, ha ha ha ha ha!

Can I see your credentials?

I've got an SSL certificate.

Will it be able to release hormones into the blood?

Sure. Like what?

i was thinking flouride, to placate the masses into consuming zombies with pristine teeth

Ah yes... the teeth...

If one train heading to Boston going 67 kmph and another going to Wisconsin at 45 kmph crossed at the exact same point in time, how big would the explosion me?

Trains don't explode when they crash.

This guy's good... real good...

>Are prosthetibutts removable? Can you leave it on a cable overnight to charge?

Better: You HAVE to! You can't remove them, though.

When do we fucking start

Can it wait until after Burning Man?

Can I please see your ass or a prototype silicone ass, whichever is closer to hand

I, uh, we don't have a prototype. That's where you angel investors come in, to fund the R and the D!

Don't pretend like you didn't hear us! I don't care about the Republican'ts and the Demoncraps!

MOON! MOON! MOON! MOON!

...Are you serious?

I've never been serious in my whole life. Show us your lower cheeks if you want a contract.

You can't sue us for harassment if you're not hired yet, so we have to do this now!

Har-ASS-ment!

Woo! Moon!

Well... thankfully, I always keep a photocopy of my butt in the folder with my CV for just this situation.

This is an adequate substitute.

Wolf whistle! Wolf whistle! I'm sorry. I can't whistle. Do you have duplicates?

if we do this right, we won't just take over the world
we might actually make money off of this
>Operation buttdial is a go

Well, sirs and/or madam, do we have ourselves a deal?

it all sounds good, but just one more thing...

how much is this gonna cost us?

How much do you have, ha ha?

...hey, sidebar, how much do we have?

None. We have none money.

okay well, i've got like seven hundred in the bank.

Perfect! Seed money.

but that's like thirty dollars american.

Wait! Are you... an illegal?

uhhhhhh...

That's just what we need! Someone to head up the illegal department.

okay well anyway, this looks to be a good opportunity for us, but we won't see any profits until it's done. do we have any way to make money NOW, enough to balance out the costs?

Woah! Slow down with all that fancy business talk... profits? costs? Don't ask us! You're the one who's supposed to dream us up that sweet sweet money river!