The Ballad of Adler Young, Canto 2.5

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Spoiler

What are the limits of an elfintory? Does the size of the objects put in it matter? Does the weight? And what happens to the weight of all the objects stored? Does the elf in question still feel it, or does it disappear into a pocket dimension? What happens to living objects stored?
Maybe the WPS could explain?

The following detailed explanation is extracted from Wise Professor Skunk's Your Elfintory and You.



"It's MIDICHLORIANS."

Lemmy > Your a master at stakeouts! You should go with adler!
Burnside > not really required to go, unless curious
Fifi > Totally in brah!
Thomson > Bound to adler and must follow
>"Looks like we have a mystery on our hands, gang."
>If you're going to start a team of super sleuths you'll first need to start a band and get a goofy cartoon sidekick.
(Group) Discuss how to set a watch for the visiting Mystery Elf.

"A stakeout?" Lemmy asked enthusiastically. "That's my area of expertise! Count me in."

"I'd rather we didn't," Burnside grumbled when I glanced at her. "I don't think there is anything of value to be learned by this, so if we're not going to be claiming the sacrificial maiden there's no point in going."

"I'm going with or without you," I informed her. "But I don't feel like this caper would be complete without a diminutive sidekick."

"That's absurd," Burnside scoffed. "But I am duty bound to accompany you, so I guess I'll have to go. At the very least it may be entertaining."

"Oh yeah, like totally," Fifi grinned when I looked at her. "No way would I miss this."

"I too am duty bound to accompany you," Thomson stated.

a pair of bunny ears, false buck tooth and a maiden dress
Adler > ask who will volunteer to be the maiden? everyone looks at you as your the fairest looking one with your white fur
(Fifi) Observe that Adler has to change clothes, if he wants to pose as a bunny maiden.

"Okay then," I continued, rubbing my hands. "One of us will have to pose as the sacrificial maiden, to act as bait to lure the Unseelie elves out into the circle."

"Totally gotta be you," Fifi exclaimed. "You're the fairest of us all, with your white fur and long hair."

"You have white fur and long hair," I pointed out. "Plus you're actually a femme."

"No way, I'm a vixen, they'll like never fall for it," the SALV insisted. "My pointy ears and big fluffy tail are a total giveaway. Plus .. well .. I'm like, not exactly a maiden."

"But ..." I began to protest.

"It can't be me," Thomson explained, "because I am supposed to be their goddess. Burnside is too small."

"And I'm officially not here," Lemmy muttered mysteriously.

"Fine," I sighed. "This is ridiculous, but we don't have time to argue. We'll need to fashion some false bunny teeth & ears out of bark or something, and I'll need a wreath of flowers and some sort of gown."

"I've got a nightgown that would look just adorable on you," Fifi giggled as everyone scattered to collect the needed supplies.

Adler > grumble and stick the disguise on. your not going to shape shift for this

About half an hour later, I was disguised as a sacrificial bunny maiden. I decided not to waste any effort at transmogrification or glamour, because the disguise only needed to work for a few minutes, in the dark of the lowfolk forest.

"It's perfect," Fifi squealed. "You make such a totally hot bunny maiden."

"You look almost good enough to eat," Burnside guffawed.

"Knock it off," I grumbled. "Let's head back to the Gate before it gets much later."

Upon returning to the lowfolk world, discover that the rabbits had left the area. With the exception of the sacrificial maiden, who still refuses to be left unsacrificed and Percy, who is now tied to a second stake next to her.

The femmes had gotten all of the giggles out of their systems by the time we reached the Gate, and we crept through silently to the circle of stones on the other side.

Percy le Gobelet was tied to the stake. He glanced around nervously while the sacrificial maiden sat cross-legged, apparently deep in meditation, on the ground beside him.

I realized with irritation that my disguise had been a pointless waste of time.

We spread out quietly among the stones and settled down to wait. The night wore on.

After a while we were alerted by a fizzling, popping sound from the Gate. This sound was followed by several steps of a thumping, heavy tread, and an imperious female voice which proclaimed:

"TREMBLE BEFORE CORNETTA, THE GREAT HORNED ONE!"

"What in the Netherhells?" the voice muttered after a moment's pause.



"I apologize for the irregularity, oh Horned One," the maiden exclaimed, jumping to her feet. "This lowly bird intruded and improperly imposed his befeathered self upon our sacred rituals. Ignore him! I alone am thy worthy sacrifice! Scorn me not! I insist that thou now fulfillest my destiny for which I was chosen, and plunge the sacred dagger into my heart!"

"Yes, absolutely, take her, and ignore my intrusion," Percy squawked. "I will not be offended in the least. I'm here by mistake anyway."

>Out of the darkness steps forth a very large shape, about 8 feet tall with red glowing eyes.
This is a elven jackalope!
(Mystery Elf) Turn out to be two elves, a hulking one, and a much smaller one.
The bigger elf, have the intelligence that makes Fifi (almost) look like a genius by comparison.

Two figures stepped forth from the shadows.

"WHADDA WE DO NOW, GEORGE?" the bigger one rumbled. "HUH? WHADDA WE DO? TWO FOR THE PRICE OF ONE, GEORGE. AM I RIGHT? HUH? AM I, GEORGE?"

"Stop calling me George, you big oaf," the other figure hissed. Then it called out, "Your sacrifice is acceptable. Where is the sacred dagger?"