Hawkspace Secret Shitposting (Santa) 2016!!! [no more signup]

Everyone should now have received their victim recipient now, so if you haven't please get angry at someone and send them a sternly worded letter. It would probably help if you sent said letter as a PM to Reyweld or I, but you never know.

(also if you are the person who got two PMs from me then the second one with the panicked allcaps in the title is the right one sorry I can explain)

But yeah, I promised I would randomise my half of the list in the most convoluted manner possible; unfortunately, since that promise was made my laptop's hard disk has died, and today also turned out to be the day I travelled home for the holidays. Consequently, I swapped "convoluted" for "downright atrocious", opting for a really quite terrible idea that came to me during the journey, and sadly the mechanism behind it cannot be publicly shared... yet. I can reveal that I resolved all quibbles with the setup with the help of a shitty online Magic 8 Ball, and that all my PMs have been sent from my decrepit but miraculously functional first-generation iPad (hence the aforementioned mistake), so I've kept to the spirit of shitposting the best I could.

May all of you have a great time shitposting!