Introductions: The Inauguraling

I just spent a good 20 minutes futilely trying to think of a witty response.

So lets just say MAYBE!

Bert, you're a creepy motherfucker.

Why am i so aroused by your words.

Oh my god Wheat. Have a little sensitivity.

You think living in fear of colorless creepy MS Paint doodles is fun? Wow man. Check your privilege. I think YOU are the one that needs to be erased!

You only say that because my avatar appears to be in black and white. Well, you know what? I identify as this picture of a pear. You will NEVER understand my struggle. I am green and round on the inside. You are incredibly intolerant and don't care about anyone else feelings.

This conversation is over. I don't need to associate with such a fruitist!

You only say that because my avatar appears to be in black and white. Well, you know what? I identify as this picture of a pear. You will NEVER understand my struggle. I am green and round on the inside. You are incredibly intolerant and don't care about anyone else feelings.

This conversation is over. I don't need to associate with such a fruitist!

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Spoiler

Wait is that the pear from that artist that drew everything fat? I love that guy.

Oh hey guys. I just found this. Old guy bad at internets.

cV! Hello and welcome aboard!

Hi cv! Welcome to the madhouse.

crippledvulture before we accept you into the eagletime wingfold, we're going to need to see your curriculum vitae. fax it to us real asap.

Since cv's birth - now: BEING A VULTURE

I was putting off joining these forums since forever, but I decided I was going to not procrastinate anymore, and then uh... Yeah, I joined I guessed.

It's me, piester, I changed my name to Pie because seven letters was waaay too many buttons to press on my keyboard.

HOORAY PIE.

Hello I am on this forum now hello.

But now how do I know which not a bear is not a bear?????????

???

I am the one who's actually not a bear.

-crashes through the window-
Friends, please take in a weary wanderer, for I have traveled many miles, and hail from pastures much more hostile than these!

I was once a broken soul, thrown out of any and all semblance of home I knew. After losing an unfair wager to Sir Igor the Mighty, I was stripped of my noble title, and left out in the streets to draw pictures with only mud covered twigs, and couple of old receipts from Walmart.

I carried on with my miserable existence, making my home out of an upturned trashcan and a soggy piece of cardboard. Until, that is, I saw a heavenly light shine from above.

Setting down my half eaten can of baked beans, I was compelled to outstretch my hand, longing to hold that light close to my heart as a child would her favorite plaything. My fingers had barely touched the light's surface, when it's brilliance grew, causing me to jump back in amazement.

Before me stood Schazer, in all her squidly honor. "Child," she said to me, "this is not the life the fates had intended. There lies a greater one yet, just beyond the river bend, and along the boulevard of broken dreams. Take this bitchin' guitarsword, and it shall lead you along the way. But take heed, for the path is dark and perilous."

Then she was gone, leaving the totally sweet guitarsword in her wake.

I hoisted the weapon upon my shoulders, a new fire growing in my chest, and I set my course eastward, where the guitarswords strings riffed most intensely.

I now stand before you, a better man, who's fought more battles that I care to remember, and far too many memories. If I may stay in your righteous company, I would be most honored.

(...Hi guys! -waves-)

AYE AND INDEED, BE WELCOME, HERE, ON THE ISLAND OF THE HAM!

Oh hey, that's where my guitar went. I was sooooo off my tits that night, I'm glad it ended up in capable hands.

You have thoroughly proven yourself, Sir Tepples. Enough that I'll forgive you for busting the window, at least.

Good evening dear WoopedyZoopers.

Well, it's about time I figure.

I just havn't been feeling it lately, so I'm really hopping this will bring the magic back.

Hi everyone!

Hi TheBoyd! You're a cool dude I remember seeing in all the best adventure threads.

Hey Boyd, welcome aboard.

welcome aBOYD

d'awwww

Hello. I am a guy that maybe some of you remember? I did not know about this place for a while, but I do know about it now. So what's up?

Also, please forgive the temporary nudity of my post, I cannot decide what to use for my avatar. EDIT: MY AVATAR IS AWESOME, DON'T LET EPAMYNONDAS TELL YOU OTHERWISE.