you've been peeling bananas wrong this whole time

So is banana banana

it turns out you must create a bananaphone

it turns out you must suspend a banana at the focus of a parabolic mirror and point the parabolic mirror at the sun

it turns out you must cast a banana out of potassium-40

It turns out you peel it like normal. Sorry for being alarmist. You may continue.

it turns out you need to throw a banana into the anisotropic Nil space, and watch it twist uncontrollably into a uniform yellow mush

it turns out you must squish a banana flat, and then fold it lengthwise, and then squish it flat and fold it lengthwise, and do that over and over

it turns out you must make a banana hotdog

it turns out you must make a banana burger

it turns out you must cook it like spaghetti

it turns out bananas have a higher form of reality than the rest of space

it turns out bananas are really the gauge boson for gravity

it turns out bananas are holograms, and the only real banana is the one at the center of venus

it turns out venus is one big banana

it turns out you need to do a special handshake

it turns out you need to get BANA 172 and BANA 173 (from the cult of the elder god bana) to write BANA 174 on your arm in a stylized format

it turns out you must make a powerful enough electromagnet around the banana, until the banana becomes magnetic, you will then have a magnenana

it turns out you must substitute every letter with either b, a, or n

bn naanb ban nnbb bb b bbnbabbn nbb

it turns out the banana number is more than 100

it turns right

it turns left

it turns in

it turns out

it turns undead