Last Day

Originally posted on MSPA by KilroyWasHere.

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Catch the coffee frozen in midair.

Originally posted on MSPA by distainfulCatalyst.

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>Think of this guy as "Murphy" from now on, otherwise things might get confusing in your head.

Originally posted on MSPA by Stickmeister.

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>Think of this guy as "Murphy" from now on, otherwise things might get confusing in your head.

He dropped his mug. Conveniently, it didn't break, allowing you to successfully sleuth out that his name is Murphy.

Pssh. He thinks HE'S the World's Best Murphy. I'll show him. What a loser.



Anyways, you make a Mental Note of his stupid name and stick it on the back of your head.

Originally posted on MSPA by Loather of Irk.

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A very important mental note: lose stickiness and detach

Originally posted on MSPA by SNeakyRobot.

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> Engage in a sword fight to the death with the free spirit hippie types up in marketing.

Originally posted on MSPA by distainfulCatalyst.

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Go to Murphy's computer. Use his email to send everyone contradictory messages. Call for a catering company, the circus, and a division of army engineers while you're at it.

Originally posted on MSPA by Krytikal Masz.

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Download viruses onto Murphy's computer.

Originally posted on MSPA by SNeakyRobot.

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> Change Murphy's screen saver to the blue screen of death. In fact, do that to every single computer you see today.

Originally posted on MSPA by Stickmeister.

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Download viruses onto Murphy's computer.

You're a coder. You have never coded viruses or anything, but you can try just...crashing his computer or something. Maybe rough it up a little. Delete some required files.

That fucker deserves it for being so ru--



Wait.



What the fuck is this.



WHAT THE FUCK IS THIS



Your computer is extremely organized. You keep all of your information on sticky notes around your computer, and your computer data within several New Folders, organized by location. The sticky notes refer to what location holds what data. The shortcuts do nothing but lead to more folders, which contain more data.

But...what the fuck is this? Where are the sticky notes? Where does he keep all his data? Does this motherfucker even KNOW how to run a computer cleanly?

Whatever. I'll show that fucker. I'm going to code in some viruses and destroy his computer.



...If you knew how.

You're so used to your sticky note New Folder location finding system that you don't have a clue how to run normal computers! People need to keep their shit in check. Savages.

Let's bring up the command prompt.



Alright, let's see what this does.









You don't have time to dick around! Let's deal with this joker later. You've got bigger fish to fry.

Originally posted on MSPA by Bohandas.

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+1 reader

Originally posted on MSPA by distainfulCatalyst.

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>Okay, go back to your computer, collapse the company firewall, download enough torrents to bog down everyone else's internet, and rig it to look like it came from Murphy's IP address.

Originally posted on MSPA by Stickmeister.

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>Okay, go back to your computer, collapse the company firewall, download enough torrents to bog down everyone else's internet, and rig it to look like it came from Murphy's IP address.

"Hey, you get that thing I sent'cha?"

(That suggestion is far too descriptive and controlling to lead into anything interesting! Besides, let's leave Murphy alone for a bit.)

Originally posted on MSPA by distainfulCatalyst.

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Okay, sorry, I'll try to tune down my suggestions a little.
>To the break room!

Originally posted on MSPA by Stickmeister.

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Okay, sorry, I'll try to tune down my suggestions a little.
>To the break room!

To the break room!



Looks like it's not lunch time yet, so nobody's in here.

To be honest, you don't come in here much. Nobody ever instructed you that you couldn't eat at your desk, and you keep it pretty clean, so you just eat while you're working. You're not lazy, you just hate your job.

Oh, look, vending machines.



You take your WALLET out of your inventory and put a dollar in the machine. Surprisingly, it goes in on the first try, without spitting it back out. That's...a bit unsettling. Worrisome, even.



What should you get?
(From left to right, CHOCO-MAN, LITTLE NIPPLES, TEEVEE DINNER: FROZEN STEAK, FLAMIN' HOT FINGERS, SOUR ATOMIC BALLS and a SHAQ SNACK.)

Originally posted on MSPA by KilroyWasHere.

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SHAQ SNACK.

DUNK IT DOWN YOUR THROAT.

Originally posted on MSPA by distainfulCatalyst.

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While munching your Shaq Snack, ponder the layout of your office building.

Originally posted on MSPA by Bohandas.

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>Get them all. Its the BREAK ROOM, so BREAK into the machine and take everything you can grab.

Originally posted on MSPA by Stickmeister.

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While munching your Shaq Snack, ponder the layout of your office building.

SHAQ SNACK.

DUNK IT DOWN YOUR THROAT.

The snack of kings. B-Ball kings, that is. Labeled with the legendary SHAQUIELLE O' NEAL, it is ridden with the very flavors of B-Ball.

You've eaten one of these before.

Once.

And it's best you just keep it in your inventory for later.

You'll definitely need it.



Anyways, the only place you worry about in this damned building is your own cubicle. You haven't really explored any of the other floors. You know the locations of your boss' office (read: LAIR), some of your friend's cubicles, and the Janitor's office. You'll want to pay him a visit later, tell him what you're going to do, because he hates his job just as much as you do.

Still in the break room, what should you do now?

Originally posted on MSPA by Fuade.

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>Sabotage the coffee. Load it up with salt, damage the handle so it breaks after a few uses, etc.

Originally posted on MSPA by Pick Yer Poison.

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> Spill some coffee on the counter, specifically in that one spot everyone likes to rest their elbows on.

Originally posted on MSPA by Entilliumn.

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put the coffe pot on your head and piss on the vending machine like an imbecile.

Originally posted on MSPA by Bohandas.

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>Break everything

Originally posted on MSPA by SNeakyRobot.

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> Insert another dollar into the vending machine and punch in codes for items that are not there. Perhaps there are secrets to be unlocked.

Originally posted on MSPA by Stickmeister.

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> Spill some coffee on the counter, specifically in that one spot everyone likes to rest their elbows on.

>Sabotage the coffee. Load it up with salt, damage the handle so it breaks after a few uses, etc.

put the coffe pot on your head and piss on the vending machine like an imbecile.

You do all of these at the same time. You look like an absolute horse's ass.

Except the pissing on the vending machine part. You're a horse's ass, but you're not a jackass.

> Insert another dollar into the vending machine and punch in codes for items that are not there. Perhaps there are secrets to be unlocked.

You feed the machine another dollar and smash the keys. All of them. You don't even expect a secret passage or anything to open up, you're just...



Well, hello...

SpoilerShow

More updates tomorrow maybe. Depends on if I stay at a friend's house. I'll be away from my tablet then. Good night!

Originally posted on MSPA by Loather of Irk.

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Poke his belly!