I'll answer your questions

how do i crash a party in fifteen minutes or less

Call and/or be the police

How do I crash

Go fast, then cease all limbs

can i ask someone for their hands or do i /have/ to steal them?

You could ask, but subterfuge and theft will earn you more of Her Favor

Does Answerland have a government?

How did we get here?

Answerland is a traditional monarchy. She rules all, and I am her mouthpiece. Think Eye of Sauron and Mouth of Sauron

You got here by total accident! But now that you're here the only way out is to DIE

Where are the largest carrots found?

Is PARTY contagious?

In the smallest farms, ironically

It's yet to be seen. Intuitively, I would guess not.

[quote='goblin's' pid='97984' dateline='1413481905']
<sub>Aww is there anything I can do to make you feel better

the stretch of time that happens after i'm died. because once that happens, then what'll I care about stuff and things going on? it's not my problem anymore. it's somebody else's bub.</sub>

You could make an offering to Her Holiness. Something a goblin would truly love.

For not fearing death, you have been marked with the BLACK SPOT. A curse far older than anyone can remember. The BLACK SPOT brings death. Soon enough, you will learn this.

Have you ever played ddr?

I'm actually using a DDR gamepad to write all my answers. I can't stop playing DDR. It is... hard to live like this.