RE: The thread for flipping shits (and tables)
02-21-2014, 07:08 PM
So, so, so, so
I lost my wallet a few weeks back which contained all the last vestiges of my ability to identify myself as myself, legally, which I haven't even started to try to reconstruct because one crisis at a time because it also had my debit/ATM card on it
So I called the bank and cancelled my card like a responsible citizen who as of like three days before actually has some money (by way of calling in the rest of my mom's life insurance policy, without which I straight up wouldn't be able to pay for college even were she still alive, probably) and would like to hold on to it and maybe have access to it
--And apparently, by the way, if you cancel your debit card Bank of America also put a hold on your checkbook for a brief period, which makes a whole lot of sense unless you're the guy who is trying to buy the prescriptions you need to maintain homeostasis without a checkbook or a debit card--
So the new debit card was due to arrive in five to seven business days. Which period I made it through without too much difficulty. At the end of which period I still didn't have a debit card.
So after eleven business days of not having a debit card I messaged the bank and asked for them to reissue it. So they were like "Cool, sorry for the convenience, that next one will now be five to seven business days."
Which was five business days ago. So today, not being hopeful that I was going to be getting this thing on time, I went down to my university's mail station just to, I dunno, let them know that if any mysterious envelopes with my name on them come in and they get the urge to burn it or shred it or anything in accordance with some ineffable sadist mail policy, please to at least drop me an email about it, because I would really like to have money now, thank you.
But first I checked my mailbox and there was an envelope! With a debit card! In my mailbox!
And I was like OH-MY-GOD-I'M-GONNA-BUY-A-BACKPACK-AND-THOSE-TEXTBOOKS-I-NEED-ALARMINGLY-SOON-AND-SO-MANY-INSULIN-NEEDLES-AND-MORE-THINGS-I-DON'T-NEED-JUST-SO-I-CAN-FEEL-POWERFUL
And I went to the ATM to activate the debit card
And it was invalid
Because this was the first debit card, arriving two weeks late, that I'd already cancelled and replaced
So hopefully despite the fact that I'd called for the second card fully two weeks after calling for the first card, I don't need to wait two weeks to have access to money, because, for one thing, by that point it'll be spring break and I'll actually need to be buying food for myself with real money if I want to eat
Just, like, argh
Spent the last year trying to put as much distance possible between me and the period when I had three dollars in my bank account and now life has decided that that point in history needs to get repeated as farce
I lost my wallet a few weeks back which contained all the last vestiges of my ability to identify myself as myself, legally, which I haven't even started to try to reconstruct because one crisis at a time because it also had my debit/ATM card on it
So I called the bank and cancelled my card like a responsible citizen who as of like three days before actually has some money (by way of calling in the rest of my mom's life insurance policy, without which I straight up wouldn't be able to pay for college even were she still alive, probably) and would like to hold on to it and maybe have access to it
--And apparently, by the way, if you cancel your debit card Bank of America also put a hold on your checkbook for a brief period, which makes a whole lot of sense unless you're the guy who is trying to buy the prescriptions you need to maintain homeostasis without a checkbook or a debit card--
So the new debit card was due to arrive in five to seven business days. Which period I made it through without too much difficulty. At the end of which period I still didn't have a debit card.
So after eleven business days of not having a debit card I messaged the bank and asked for them to reissue it. So they were like "Cool, sorry for the convenience, that next one will now be five to seven business days."
Which was five business days ago. So today, not being hopeful that I was going to be getting this thing on time, I went down to my university's mail station just to, I dunno, let them know that if any mysterious envelopes with my name on them come in and they get the urge to burn it or shred it or anything in accordance with some ineffable sadist mail policy, please to at least drop me an email about it, because I would really like to have money now, thank you.
But first I checked my mailbox and there was an envelope! With a debit card! In my mailbox!
And I was like OH-MY-GOD-I'M-GONNA-BUY-A-BACKPACK-AND-THOSE-TEXTBOOKS-I-NEED-ALARMINGLY-SOON-AND-SO-MANY-INSULIN-NEEDLES-AND-MORE-THINGS-I-DON'T-NEED-JUST-SO-I-CAN-FEEL-POWERFUL
And I went to the ATM to activate the debit card
And it was invalid
Because this was the first debit card, arriving two weeks late, that I'd already cancelled and replaced
So hopefully despite the fact that I'd called for the second card fully two weeks after calling for the first card, I don't need to wait two weeks to have access to money, because, for one thing, by that point it'll be spring break and I'll actually need to be buying food for myself with real money if I want to eat
Just, like, argh
Spent the last year trying to put as much distance possible between me and the period when I had three dollars in my bank account and now life has decided that that point in history needs to get repeated as farce