RE: This is gonna be the thread where we talk about stuff
08-27-2013, 09:06 PM
As much as I enjoy the company of my online friends [really, you guys are wonderful], the lack of physical proximity leaves me keenly aware of the absence of a feature exclusive to in-person socialization: the ability to JUST enjoy someone's company. Friends sitting apart, each involved in their own isolated entertainments, yet glad to be spending idle time together. It is not the uneasy, awkward silence of an inactive IRC, but a quiet suffused with the gentle knowledge that a certain other is present.
I enjoy sitting alone, doing my own thing, sometimes [especially] when other people are around -- but even among my closest friends, there are not very many with whom I can consistently sustain that feeling of needing to do nothing but be present. Oh, there are glimpses of it, to be sure. But all too soon, in the midst of that comfortable feeling, a worry worms its way into your thoughts--What if I'm the only one enjoying this situation? Am I being inconsiderate? Perhaps you were right to worry, and your awkward small-talk is a boon to your companion. Perhaps you have just ended your friend's enjoyment of the silence by breaking it. Perhaps they speak first. In any event, the moment has passed, and you are now Doing Things again, and that's excellent too.
I can't do more than vaguely speculate on the attraction/lust aspect of it, but I can get wanting to keep in your life/stay with whom-so-ever you've managed to establish that level of companionship with, regardless of shared interests or lack thereof.
[Know I'm responding to something a while ago but I intended to talk/rant through to the more current part of conversation when suddenly class time :<]
I enjoy sitting alone, doing my own thing, sometimes [especially] when other people are around -- but even among my closest friends, there are not very many with whom I can consistently sustain that feeling of needing to do nothing but be present. Oh, there are glimpses of it, to be sure. But all too soon, in the midst of that comfortable feeling, a worry worms its way into your thoughts--What if I'm the only one enjoying this situation? Am I being inconsiderate? Perhaps you were right to worry, and your awkward small-talk is a boon to your companion. Perhaps you have just ended your friend's enjoyment of the silence by breaking it. Perhaps they speak first. In any event, the moment has passed, and you are now Doing Things again, and that's excellent too.
I can't do more than vaguely speculate on the attraction/lust aspect of it, but I can get wanting to keep in your life/stay with whom-so-ever you've managed to establish that level of companionship with, regardless of shared interests or lack thereof.
[Know I'm responding to something a while ago but I intended to talk/rant through to the more current part of conversation when suddenly class time :<]
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