The Relentless Slaughter [Round 3: Tormentorland]

The Relentless Slaughter [Round 3: Tormentorland]
#46
Re: The Relentless Slaughter [Round 1: Untitled-1]
Originally posted on MSPA by MalkyTop.

A floating eye thing with razor blades spinning around it and laser eyes. (Or, uh, eye.) Are you kidding me.

Samael vaguely recalled playing some sort of video game with a boss that was somewhat like this. He may have even programmed a boss like this at some point. He bet that the protagonists didn’t have to fight the boss while carrying a young woman and trying to stay on a very dangerous staircase that was growing steadily more dangerous as a misanthropic eraser tried to wipe it away under his feet.

The large eye floated up to the side and into his view. Immediately, a soft and rotten orange appeared and landed on it, splattering stinging juice everywhere. The eyeball didn’t give off a satisfying roar, but it certainly was blinded. With no real way to blink, it was stuck with citrus juice running down painfully. To be safe, he also dropped half a grapefruit on it.

He probably couldn’t do anything about the eraser, though. The only thing he could do is keep not falling, which he was getting good at, despite his new robes tripping him up every once in a while. Just keep running until the end of the stairs…the end…wait, where was the end…?

Samael glanced upwards briefly, very briefly so that he could go back to watching where his feet went, but it was long enough for him to catch sight of the pencil up ahead, still drawing the spiraling staircase. There was definitely no end in sight.

Maybe…if he just threw himself off…then it was simply just going through reincarnation again. Right? And it would be his last chance to do so…so it was better sooner than later, before someone else died. Considering how the girl in his arms must be feeling right now, she might not mind either.

…Okay, actually, people usually do mind death. She probably wouldn’t like him deciding for her. And looking at her, he felt that she probably needed his help right about now. So just dying at this moment was out of the question. Right now he had to figure out how to stop all this…uh…portal…thing. But first, he had to get off this stupid staircase.

As the eraser gleefully tried to erase the steps directly under his feet, he leapt off the side, which seemed to stun both pencil and eraser for a while until a giant, square watermelon popped into existence underneath the two and they collided with its tough surface. Samael dropped the unconscious girl, a little stunned, then realized that with a homicidal pencil and eraser after them, it wasn’t the time to be winded. The watermelon was rather heavy, especially with two people on it, but he managed to get it to speedily float away.

Apparently, the pencil hadn’t bothered to draw anything this high, but now it was hurriedly trying to draw a wall in front of him. Another tomato appeared and, as the watermelon wobbled slightly, the tomato impaled itself on the pencil, covering up its point. As the pencil struggled with this new obstacle, Samael sped by and out over the rest of the castle dungeon building thing. Woah, did he really climb that high? Amazing he didn’t pass out from exhaustion.

The giant watermelon continued to pass over unfinished walls and rooms and started drifting lower. Beside him, more spirit god things continued to peer out of the portals on the girl. They thankfully didn’t burn him, but he had a feeling that this crap had gone on long enough, and also they were breaking his concentration. “Okay, you know what, you guys, mind staying in that place where you’re staying or whatever? For now?”

Something that was furry and owlish and fox-like at the same time stared at him before hopping out and bounding away on air. Many others followed its examples. “Seriously. Stop it,” he warned, while retying the strip of cloth around his eyes.

Seeing no consequence, they were practically pouring out now, feeling bolder with every transgression. The large snout thrashed, still unable to fit through. “ENOUGH.” Various fruits suddenly pelted any exiting spirits, surprising most and causing a tactical retreat. The cleverer ones glared at him, eyes glinting oddly, before conceding victory. The snout hesitated and disappeared. “Just…give her a rest,” Samael added cautiously, not sure if they could even hear him anymore.

Well, that problem was solved. “Uh.” He coughed and tried to shake the girl awake, but paused. It would probably be really awkward if she woke up and found herself on a giant watermelon with a guy who was wearing her clothes. So maybe he should—

The watermelon crashed into a line as it drifted a little too low and jolted the whole vehicle, startling the girl awake. “Guh—wuh…what!” She squawked, almost jumping to her feet as Samael tried to steady the watermelon. “I, uh, what, what the!” As he thought, she could not easily accept that she was sitting atop a flying watermelon. She whirled her head around, trying to make sense of things, before catching sight of Samael. She stared at him with wide eyes, possibly the eyes of someone who thinks she has just been kidnapped, and then said, “You’re wearing my robes.”

“Well,” Samael said, and stopped. “Um,” he started again. “I g-guess…I am…?”

Neither of them had time to ponder this fact as, having lost concentration again, Samael didn’t notice the watermelon drifting too low until it crash-landed and deposited the both of them rather forcefully into some beast’s legs. All six of them.

The long, thin legs gave the appearance of some fragility or at least something easily unbalanced, but though the dog…thing stumbled as they crashed into it, it remained upright and stared down at them with impossibly huge eyes. Samael gaped at it before rolling away from an attacking leg. Judging from the way it looked, it could probably stab right through him.

The girl had already gotten up and was stumbling away, eyes wide. Samael was about to get up when something seemed to whip past the side of his head. Looking down, he noticed that one impossibly long leg was hooking itself in the square hole in his hand.

Looking up again, he saw the dog thing staring back. It didn’t seem capable of even knowing what it was about to do. As it raised another leg menacingly, Samael tugged at his hand and stopped immediately at the burning pain. He looked up again.

Oh come on.

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Re: The Relentless Slaughter [Round 1: Untitled-1] - by MalkyTop - 03-11-2011, 12:35 AM