Re: Grand Battle S3G1! (Round One: Vio Maleficat)
01-12-2011, 03:34 AM
Originally posted on MSPA by Valter.
Flying was a bit of a new sensation for Kerak, although inundated as it was in all the other new sensations he had been experiencing, it hardly even merited attention. It wasn't even that useful, given the cramped quarters he was working his way through! What a rip.
It was supposedly a very fun experience, or so his Pterosaur contacts had insisted at every possible opportunity. They preferred to talk about the glory of flapping your wings and gliding, though, while Kerak's method of locomotion was more like pointing himself in a direction and simply willing himself forward. The Chaos apparently wasn't ready to impart true flight. Maybe that was a result of Murdoch's... Thing Beam?
He didn't particularly mind the Chaos, or its present shyness; it had manifested a meal or two for him already, and caused quite a number of other very interesting things. The rest of the contestants seemed to resent its presence, though, and conquering it would make a good story for his staff. So it simply had to be dealt with.
As did the miscreant Kerak had been chasing for the last ten minutes!
Scofflaw came into view around the next corner, his movement severely hampered by the stiff costume he was still stuck in. Kerak wasted no time in diving straight into him and knocking him to the floor, and followed up that maneuver by sitting his entire bulk on top of the hapless human's chest. "Scofflaw!" Kerak shouted, lowering his head nearly to his victim's ear. "Let's talk."
Scofflaw flailed his limbs for a few moments before reaching the conclusion that yes, a dinosaur was now sitting on him, and no amount of scuffling would be likely to change that any time soon. He gave up that approach and decided to settle for a sullen stare. "Wouldn't you rather eat me? That seems more like your preferred approach." Goading the dinosaur on was not strictly speaking the best of ideas, but if the dinosaur were truly intent on biting his head off, it probably would have done so already.
"What? Oh gosh, no! I ate my fill recently. Well, fairly recently. I could go for a little- No no no! That's not important. I want to hear your story!"
"My story? What do you mean?" Scofflaw was willing to feign incredulity for now; more questions meant more time not spent being eaten, and he needed that time to reach his equipment. He had enough ordnance concealed on his person to conquer a small island nation (a fact he had tested and proven extensively back home).
Unfortunately, the ordnance in question was currently made inaccessible by the tuxedo still covering his body. Not to mention the dinosaur sitting on him. Couldn't forget that.
"Yes, yes! Your story! What makes you a "bastard, in short", as the funny man with the scepter said? You don't look that short!"
"I think 'in short' is a figure of speech..." If I can only reach my penknife, I might be able to cut through the seams of the tuxedo... Ah! Here we go.
"Haha! Yes, that's the joke!"
"It was very funny, then. My story is a bit long, though, so maybe you could shift your weight slightly to the side? To give me just a bit more comfort?" Okay, I've reached my weapons pocket. Now to find a weapon that won't kill me too if I use it; amusing though the Devastator may be, I'm not sure it's appropriate for this company. I wonder if The Fool has a contingency for if all eight contestants die at once?
"Oh, well, I don't see why not." Kerak leaned backward, giving Scofflaw significantly more room to dig through his pockets. "Is your story interesting? How many people have you killed?"
Aha! The Atomizer. This should do perfectly! "I lost track a long time ago, Kerak, but I know it's about to be one mo- Wait." Scofflaw paused mid-draw. Something about Kerak's earlier talking had struck him as just a bit funny. "You called The Fool a 'funny man with a scepter'? Don't you hate him?"
"What? No! He brought all of you interesting people for me to talk to." Kerak shook his head. "If anything, I do believe I owe this Fool a favor."
"Why are you traveling with Tor and Tengeri, then? They don't seem particularly pleased with the Fool..." The bugs planted on everybody Scofflaw had met so far gave him something of a tactical advantage; the video was a bit grainy, but he had seen enough of Tengeri's messages to get the gist of her unctuousness.
Kerak didn't even seem to notice Scofflaw's oddly specific knowledge about his travel companions. "I don't care about what they want. What they want doesn't matter! What matters is what they have, and Tengeri has something that I want."
"What do you want?"
"Are you going to tell me your story or not?"
"Are you going to get off my chest or not?"
"Oh, alright." Kerak hopped off Scofflaw, noting somewhat despondently that he could no longer fly.
Scofflaw sat up and, after a moment's consideration, re-holstered his Atomizer. "As I said before, my story's a bit of a long one. I could certainly go over it all, but..."
"Yes? But what?"
"Well, traveling alone has proven to be somewhat hazardous, and I must admit that I am not so used to working without minio-associates. If you're willing to travel with me, I'd be happy to tell you my story, and maybe we'll even get what you want from Tengeri while we're at it!"
"Oh, fantastic," Kerak said excitedly. "Done and done."
Scofflaw stood up, ripped off the last remnants of his silly tuxedo, and beckoned for Kerak to follow him. It was an odd choice of lackey, to be sure, but heavens knew he had to start somewhere.
Flying was a bit of a new sensation for Kerak, although inundated as it was in all the other new sensations he had been experiencing, it hardly even merited attention. It wasn't even that useful, given the cramped quarters he was working his way through! What a rip.
It was supposedly a very fun experience, or so his Pterosaur contacts had insisted at every possible opportunity. They preferred to talk about the glory of flapping your wings and gliding, though, while Kerak's method of locomotion was more like pointing himself in a direction and simply willing himself forward. The Chaos apparently wasn't ready to impart true flight. Maybe that was a result of Murdoch's... Thing Beam?
He didn't particularly mind the Chaos, or its present shyness; it had manifested a meal or two for him already, and caused quite a number of other very interesting things. The rest of the contestants seemed to resent its presence, though, and conquering it would make a good story for his staff. So it simply had to be dealt with.
As did the miscreant Kerak had been chasing for the last ten minutes!
Scofflaw came into view around the next corner, his movement severely hampered by the stiff costume he was still stuck in. Kerak wasted no time in diving straight into him and knocking him to the floor, and followed up that maneuver by sitting his entire bulk on top of the hapless human's chest. "Scofflaw!" Kerak shouted, lowering his head nearly to his victim's ear. "Let's talk."
Scofflaw flailed his limbs for a few moments before reaching the conclusion that yes, a dinosaur was now sitting on him, and no amount of scuffling would be likely to change that any time soon. He gave up that approach and decided to settle for a sullen stare. "Wouldn't you rather eat me? That seems more like your preferred approach." Goading the dinosaur on was not strictly speaking the best of ideas, but if the dinosaur were truly intent on biting his head off, it probably would have done so already.
"What? Oh gosh, no! I ate my fill recently. Well, fairly recently. I could go for a little- No no no! That's not important. I want to hear your story!"
"My story? What do you mean?" Scofflaw was willing to feign incredulity for now; more questions meant more time not spent being eaten, and he needed that time to reach his equipment. He had enough ordnance concealed on his person to conquer a small island nation (a fact he had tested and proven extensively back home).
Unfortunately, the ordnance in question was currently made inaccessible by the tuxedo still covering his body. Not to mention the dinosaur sitting on him. Couldn't forget that.
"Yes, yes! Your story! What makes you a "bastard, in short", as the funny man with the scepter said? You don't look that short!"
"I think 'in short' is a figure of speech..." If I can only reach my penknife, I might be able to cut through the seams of the tuxedo... Ah! Here we go.
"Haha! Yes, that's the joke!"
"It was very funny, then. My story is a bit long, though, so maybe you could shift your weight slightly to the side? To give me just a bit more comfort?" Okay, I've reached my weapons pocket. Now to find a weapon that won't kill me too if I use it; amusing though the Devastator may be, I'm not sure it's appropriate for this company. I wonder if The Fool has a contingency for if all eight contestants die at once?
"Oh, well, I don't see why not." Kerak leaned backward, giving Scofflaw significantly more room to dig through his pockets. "Is your story interesting? How many people have you killed?"
Aha! The Atomizer. This should do perfectly! "I lost track a long time ago, Kerak, but I know it's about to be one mo- Wait." Scofflaw paused mid-draw. Something about Kerak's earlier talking had struck him as just a bit funny. "You called The Fool a 'funny man with a scepter'? Don't you hate him?"
"What? No! He brought all of you interesting people for me to talk to." Kerak shook his head. "If anything, I do believe I owe this Fool a favor."
"Why are you traveling with Tor and Tengeri, then? They don't seem particularly pleased with the Fool..." The bugs planted on everybody Scofflaw had met so far gave him something of a tactical advantage; the video was a bit grainy, but he had seen enough of Tengeri's messages to get the gist of her unctuousness.
Kerak didn't even seem to notice Scofflaw's oddly specific knowledge about his travel companions. "I don't care about what they want. What they want doesn't matter! What matters is what they have, and Tengeri has something that I want."
"What do you want?"
"Are you going to tell me your story or not?"
"Are you going to get off my chest or not?"
"Oh, alright." Kerak hopped off Scofflaw, noting somewhat despondently that he could no longer fly.
Scofflaw sat up and, after a moment's consideration, re-holstered his Atomizer. "As I said before, my story's a bit of a long one. I could certainly go over it all, but..."
"Yes? But what?"
"Well, traveling alone has proven to be somewhat hazardous, and I must admit that I am not so used to working without minio-associates. If you're willing to travel with me, I'd be happy to tell you my story, and maybe we'll even get what you want from Tengeri while we're at it!"
"Oh, fantastic," Kerak said excitedly. "Done and done."
Scofflaw stood up, ripped off the last remnants of his silly tuxedo, and beckoned for Kerak to follow him. It was an odd choice of lackey, to be sure, but heavens knew he had to start somewhere.