Re: Mini-Grand 5101 [Round 2: Medieval Village]
08-18-2011, 12:33 AM
Originally posted on MSPA by BlastYoBoots.
"RAAAAAAHRRRGH!!!"
Nathan hid behind one of the remaining inside walls of a barely-standing residence as Deathwing unleashed little orb-shaped pieces of Hell onto random buildings from the air. The sudden appearance of a rather impressively rendered dragon had given Nate enough time to escape his gaze, for all that was worth; the Avenger had an empty clip, the harpoon gun was back under Deathwing's field of vision, and there was no other intact cover nearby left to facilitate escape. All he could do was wait and hope for Deathwing to get distracted. I mean, he at least needed a couple snapshots of that dragon before this was over.
As he threw his eyes around what little remained of the building, he caught small eyes staring out at him from around a doorway. The eyes gasped and retreated, prompting a rather large man to appear wielding an enormous pitchfork.
He advanced quickly. "I saw your destructive magic. I don't care if this whole country burns down, no harm will come to my family!"
Nathan deflected the man's pitchfork thrust with the Avenger, dropping the weapon to close in between the man and his fork. In a practiced maneuver, Nate brought his knife from his belt directly into the man's nearby midsection. His eyes widened in shock. A second stab to the heart and a pistol-whip to the head were all Nate needed to knock him to the ground in a bloody heap.
The small boy behind the corner screamed as his father fell. He ran out at Nathan unarmed; Nate dispatched him with a devastating boot to the ribs, sending him flying into a wall section hard enough to crack his neck. Smearing virtual blood from his knife and hand onto his shirt, Nathan ducked back behind the safety of his cover wall.
A knight cuts through villagers like joke fodder NPCs, and then the game tries to pull the moral choice angle with them? Sheesh! Must have been a mish-mash of conflicting developers piecing together their work or something.
Berlin didn't normally summon his Segway. Fast and efficient as it was, its supercharged magical motor (retooled by Berlin the night of a drunken bender) had the rather unfortunate downside of being fueled by horse semen. Naturally, he wasn't keen on eventually having to top off its tank, but being chased by an enormous fire-breathing ex-wife prompts one to overlook such inconveniences.
"Just where do you think you're going, dear?" The dragon-witch loudly incinerated another structure, stepping through it to get a better angle on her fleeing prey. "Typical of you to avoid a brisk jog every chance you can get. God knows how little energy you'd have left for sleeping around behind my back!"
Berlin wheeled around another corner, kicking up dirt as he narrowly avoided another fiery blast. "Dammit, Agatha, it was never like that! Nothing shuts up a creditor like photographic evidence of you sleeping with their mother. For fucks sake, you spent more on clothes than a small island nation!"
"YOOOOUUUU!!!"
Hovering in midair with a violently steaming, overheated arm-cannon, Deathwing spotted the old man who had dealt him the most humiliating insult he had ever experienced. He dove down to the wizard, intending to behead him with one swift–
"AGO STOLIDUS!"
Berlin set a field around Deathwing's body, throttling his approach down to comical slow-motion. Goddamnit, I have to hurry and make it to her house! It's the only way to stop her.
Nathan took the opportunity to escape from cover, loading the Avenger with a pile of hay from a nearby stable; it vacuumed it all into the barrel with a ridiculous FWUP. Quickly, he turned the loaded weapon on the suspended Deathwing, only to find the dragon staring straight at him. "Now what are you doing, little–"
Nathan launched a massive bale at the dragon's head, only to see it dodged and deflected into the distance with a deft burst of flame. "How did you get tha...?" Her eyes suddenly widened, and she trampled off in pursuit of Berlin all the angrier. "Berlin, did you give some punk my FIFTH ANNIVERSARY PRESENT TO YOU?!"
Deathwing's stasis expired, and he rocketed away in pursuit of the wizard. Nathan approached his fallen harpoon gun, still quite befuddled. As he slung the Herbage Avenger behind him and hoisted the device, he caught sight of Sir Kaiden Stormblade, charging and screaming in pursuit of the others... in complete and total silence.
"RAAAAAAHRRRGH!!!"
Nathan hid behind one of the remaining inside walls of a barely-standing residence as Deathwing unleashed little orb-shaped pieces of Hell onto random buildings from the air. The sudden appearance of a rather impressively rendered dragon had given Nate enough time to escape his gaze, for all that was worth; the Avenger had an empty clip, the harpoon gun was back under Deathwing's field of vision, and there was no other intact cover nearby left to facilitate escape. All he could do was wait and hope for Deathwing to get distracted. I mean, he at least needed a couple snapshots of that dragon before this was over.
As he threw his eyes around what little remained of the building, he caught small eyes staring out at him from around a doorway. The eyes gasped and retreated, prompting a rather large man to appear wielding an enormous pitchfork.
He advanced quickly. "I saw your destructive magic. I don't care if this whole country burns down, no harm will come to my family!"
Nathan deflected the man's pitchfork thrust with the Avenger, dropping the weapon to close in between the man and his fork. In a practiced maneuver, Nate brought his knife from his belt directly into the man's nearby midsection. His eyes widened in shock. A second stab to the heart and a pistol-whip to the head were all Nate needed to knock him to the ground in a bloody heap.
The small boy behind the corner screamed as his father fell. He ran out at Nathan unarmed; Nate dispatched him with a devastating boot to the ribs, sending him flying into a wall section hard enough to crack his neck. Smearing virtual blood from his knife and hand onto his shirt, Nathan ducked back behind the safety of his cover wall.
A knight cuts through villagers like joke fodder NPCs, and then the game tries to pull the moral choice angle with them? Sheesh! Must have been a mish-mash of conflicting developers piecing together their work or something.
Berlin didn't normally summon his Segway. Fast and efficient as it was, its supercharged magical motor (retooled by Berlin the night of a drunken bender) had the rather unfortunate downside of being fueled by horse semen. Naturally, he wasn't keen on eventually having to top off its tank, but being chased by an enormous fire-breathing ex-wife prompts one to overlook such inconveniences.
"Just where do you think you're going, dear?" The dragon-witch loudly incinerated another structure, stepping through it to get a better angle on her fleeing prey. "Typical of you to avoid a brisk jog every chance you can get. God knows how little energy you'd have left for sleeping around behind my back!"
Berlin wheeled around another corner, kicking up dirt as he narrowly avoided another fiery blast. "Dammit, Agatha, it was never like that! Nothing shuts up a creditor like photographic evidence of you sleeping with their mother. For fucks sake, you spent more on clothes than a small island nation!"
"YOOOOUUUU!!!"
Hovering in midair with a violently steaming, overheated arm-cannon, Deathwing spotted the old man who had dealt him the most humiliating insult he had ever experienced. He dove down to the wizard, intending to behead him with one swift–
"AGO STOLIDUS!"
Berlin set a field around Deathwing's body, throttling his approach down to comical slow-motion. Goddamnit, I have to hurry and make it to her house! It's the only way to stop her.
Nathan took the opportunity to escape from cover, loading the Avenger with a pile of hay from a nearby stable; it vacuumed it all into the barrel with a ridiculous FWUP. Quickly, he turned the loaded weapon on the suspended Deathwing, only to find the dragon staring straight at him. "Now what are you doing, little–"
Nathan launched a massive bale at the dragon's head, only to see it dodged and deflected into the distance with a deft burst of flame. "How did you get tha...?" Her eyes suddenly widened, and she trampled off in pursuit of Berlin all the angrier. "Berlin, did you give some punk my FIFTH ANNIVERSARY PRESENT TO YOU?!"
Deathwing's stasis expired, and he rocketed away in pursuit of the wizard. Nathan approached his fallen harpoon gun, still quite befuddled. As he slung the Herbage Avenger behind him and hoisted the device, he caught sight of Sir Kaiden Stormblade, charging and screaming in pursuit of the others... in complete and total silence.