Re: Mini-Grand 5102 [Round 1: Sprawl-Mart]
06-02-2011, 09:13 AM
Originally posted on MSPA by Pharmacy.
Sprawl-Mart, the number one Warehouse Club in the economy of this particular reality! Never mind that they drove native supermarkets to the ground to get to this state, but hey! Rock-and-roll things for rocking low prices! Beverages, motorcycles, lawn chairs, plutonium - you want it, they have it! Better yet to serve you with! As their company motto cheekily says, “Buy Smart at Sprawl-Mart!”
However, the Sprawl-Mart motto, while oozing saccharine cheeriness and empty promises, cloaks the true state of the supermarket complex: impending chaos. In the case of the shoppers and consumers in the “Cosmetics & Toiletries” Section, the chaos was greeted with utter bewilderment. Various bottles of expensive stuff had been upset. Most of them broken, spilling their fragrant oils onto the floor. However, the attention was not on the considerable mess, but on what was rolling around in the broken glass and spilled perfumes--some extravagantly-collared man. Except--he was not quite human-looking (something that only made the screams of those female adolescents witnessing it louder). Never mind that, Miecz continued to loll around the mess, blissfully unaware of gawking spectators.
Oh man, this was definitely paradise. At first, he was preparing for a mission. Then, a second later, he had crashed down on a shelf of toiletries, making a large but nice smelling mess, a plethora of fun flavors pleasing to his keen nose. He could not waste that perfect opportunity, so he focused his energy on saturating every bit of his body with delicious smells. Unfortunately, through the happy haze, his face-slits told him there were two portly gentlemen in uniforms leaning over him while they held something in their hands directly pointed at his face. These must be angels of this paradisiacal place! Speaking of which, Miecz never knew the name of this lovely spot of Eden. Such shame! He had to ask them.
“'Ey, man, can you tell me wha- GAHHH!”
Miecz was immediately met with strong sprays of Mace. As he had no eyes, the Mace did not have much effect on him. Unfortunately, some landed in his mouth. Boy, it tasted nasty, nasty enough to make him slightly nauseous. Miecz proceeded to empty his digested lunch (two steaks, goat stew, and tavern lager) onto one of offending cops by accident. The other cop attempted to fire a something at him. However, Miecz, his senses arrested, unhooked a blade in his arm to defend himself, batting the TASER projectile into the unfortunate vomit-covered cop, who promptly fainted from the combination of introduced electricity and the foul smell. The swordmonster dropped on fours and began to sprint away – so quickly that his blade was still hanging out from the arm. Yelping, he absconded from that part of the store, reeking of flowers and emesis.
Sprawl-Mart, the number one Warehouse Club in the economy of this particular reality! Never mind that they drove native supermarkets to the ground to get to this state, but hey! Rock-and-roll things for rocking low prices! Beverages, motorcycles, lawn chairs, plutonium - you want it, they have it! Better yet to serve you with! As their company motto cheekily says, “Buy Smart at Sprawl-Mart!”
However, the Sprawl-Mart motto, while oozing saccharine cheeriness and empty promises, cloaks the true state of the supermarket complex: impending chaos. In the case of the shoppers and consumers in the “Cosmetics & Toiletries” Section, the chaos was greeted with utter bewilderment. Various bottles of expensive stuff had been upset. Most of them broken, spilling their fragrant oils onto the floor. However, the attention was not on the considerable mess, but on what was rolling around in the broken glass and spilled perfumes--some extravagantly-collared man. Except--he was not quite human-looking (something that only made the screams of those female adolescents witnessing it louder). Never mind that, Miecz continued to loll around the mess, blissfully unaware of gawking spectators.
Oh man, this was definitely paradise. At first, he was preparing for a mission. Then, a second later, he had crashed down on a shelf of toiletries, making a large but nice smelling mess, a plethora of fun flavors pleasing to his keen nose. He could not waste that perfect opportunity, so he focused his energy on saturating every bit of his body with delicious smells. Unfortunately, through the happy haze, his face-slits told him there were two portly gentlemen in uniforms leaning over him while they held something in their hands directly pointed at his face. These must be angels of this paradisiacal place! Speaking of which, Miecz never knew the name of this lovely spot of Eden. Such shame! He had to ask them.
“'Ey, man, can you tell me wha- GAHHH!”
Miecz was immediately met with strong sprays of Mace. As he had no eyes, the Mace did not have much effect on him. Unfortunately, some landed in his mouth. Boy, it tasted nasty, nasty enough to make him slightly nauseous. Miecz proceeded to empty his digested lunch (two steaks, goat stew, and tavern lager) onto one of offending cops by accident. The other cop attempted to fire a something at him. However, Miecz, his senses arrested, unhooked a blade in his arm to defend himself, batting the TASER projectile into the unfortunate vomit-covered cop, who promptly fainted from the combination of introduced electricity and the foul smell. The swordmonster dropped on fours and began to sprint away – so quickly that his blade was still hanging out from the arm. Yelping, he absconded from that part of the store, reeking of flowers and emesis.