Re: Pitched Combat [Final Round: Simulacrum Citadel]
12-22-2010, 05:11 PM
Originally posted on MSPA by MalkyTop.
”Oh my god what the hell is he doing.”
There were robots everywhere, hundreds of them. While they rampaged around and generally caused a ruckus with their wildly waving tools of torture, Right and Rong (mostly Right) had decided that it would probably be a good time to fly on out of there and land on top of a glass exhibit. At least away from any dangerous objects. One robot torturer wasn’t much of a problem, but a crowd of them was hard to deal with and also made things a little claustrophobic.
“I honestly have no idea, but really, it looks as though he’s just digging his own grave,” Right replied as they perched up high and watched the crowd move run about below. “We could probably just wait around for him to kill himself.”
Rong huffed and pouted. “But that’s booooooorrrring.”
“You could always set fire to everything.”
Rong was silent for a long time before she even dared turn to stare at Right. “I…what?”
“You could always set fire to everything,” Right repeated very patiently.
“You’re…actually giving me permission to do that?” Rong asked, bewildered. “No, ‘it’s gonna topple trees and crush us’ or ‘it’ll burn people we shouldn’t burn’ or ‘you’re an idiot stop thinking about fire all the time?’”
“No. You could always set fire to everything.”
Rong scrunched up her face a little bit, trying to see some sort of loophole or reverse psychology thingy that Right was setting up for whatever reason, not that he really had one. It just seemed to be one of those statements that were automatically loaded with some hidden meaning. “But…uh…the little guy has that fire…moving thing. You saw that a while ago, right? That wasn’t just me, right?”
“No, that wasn’t just you,” Right said, watching the crowd of contestant and robots turn the corner. “But for one thing, fire can’t exactly hurt us so he can’t really weaponize your fire against us as far as I see and for another, he seems a little bit too panicky to even think about doing anything with fire besides running away from it.”
Rong thought about this a little harder, but really, she wasn’t the thinking type and the opportunity to SET FIRE TO EVERYTHING was just too good to pass up, consequences be damned, and if it does turn out bad, she could actually push all the blame to Right. Blame Right for once! My god, she almost didn’t think of that! This was just turning out better and better.
And so with no further contemplation (it would have been a little worrying had she actually pursued the act of contemplation even further), Rong breathed fire onto the masses.
“You should probably make it hot enough to melt metal,” Right suggested rather unnecessarily, for in her eagerness to raze the whole damn place to the ground, she was melting pretty much everything. Realizing that this likely included the platform which they were standing on, Right flew upwards and, with a few bursts of speed, reached the ceiling, decided he didn’t want to keep holding all of them up, and turned into a grappling hook and dug himself into whatever this ceiling was made of. Rong was happy with this, as this gave her a better angle to SET FIRE TO EVERYTHING. And thus, engrossed in this important task, Rong didn’t really notice that her original target had already gone through the panic cycle twice, reached a door after many panicked flailing, and ran through it in a panicked manner. As an afterthought, he slammed it shut behind him.
As Right was also too busy staring at the ceiling, Eemp was the only one to really notice this happening. After considering this matter for a few moments, already an impressive feat considering it had straw for brains, and evidently decided on something, for he started swinging his legs.
After a while, Rong stopped SETTING FIRE TO EVERYTHING and, annoyed, looked up towards Right. “It’s throwing off my aaaiiiim!” she whined. And after a moment, Right let go and transformed back to himself again.
“And that wasn’t exactly easy on my jaw,” he commented. “I do believe dear old Eemp is trying to get us to do something.”
“Well, maybe it should stop so that I can actually aim,” Rong snapped.
“Now, now, perhaps it actually has something important to tell us. And considering it acts as our legs, we sort of have some sort of obligation to figure out what it wants. Also, I am now unbelievably bored. Come on, I’m pretty sure it wants us to go that way…”
------------------------------
It took some fumbling about, but Jordan actually managed to safely take his inhaler out of his pocket and not drop it on the floor. Though instead of using it, he just stared at it for a disconcertingly long amount of time, as though he had never seen it before. He couldn’t help but realize that he had never once used it throughout this entire battle, despite forests and fires and forest fires and giant statues and crap, he had apparently forgotten that sometimes, during stressful situations, he would need an inhaler.
For whatever reason, this calmed Jordan down and he pocketed the inhaler again with little fumbling and a clearer state of mind. Now was probably a good time to go ahead and see where he had ended up, then.
Well, for one thing, there certainly were a lot of books. For another, there were no longer any sort of moving being that wanted to kill him. Things were looking up.
”Oh my god what the hell is he doing.”
There were robots everywhere, hundreds of them. While they rampaged around and generally caused a ruckus with their wildly waving tools of torture, Right and Rong (mostly Right) had decided that it would probably be a good time to fly on out of there and land on top of a glass exhibit. At least away from any dangerous objects. One robot torturer wasn’t much of a problem, but a crowd of them was hard to deal with and also made things a little claustrophobic.
“I honestly have no idea, but really, it looks as though he’s just digging his own grave,” Right replied as they perched up high and watched the crowd move run about below. “We could probably just wait around for him to kill himself.”
Rong huffed and pouted. “But that’s booooooorrrring.”
“You could always set fire to everything.”
Rong was silent for a long time before she even dared turn to stare at Right. “I…what?”
“You could always set fire to everything,” Right repeated very patiently.
“You’re…actually giving me permission to do that?” Rong asked, bewildered. “No, ‘it’s gonna topple trees and crush us’ or ‘it’ll burn people we shouldn’t burn’ or ‘you’re an idiot stop thinking about fire all the time?’”
“No. You could always set fire to everything.”
Rong scrunched up her face a little bit, trying to see some sort of loophole or reverse psychology thingy that Right was setting up for whatever reason, not that he really had one. It just seemed to be one of those statements that were automatically loaded with some hidden meaning. “But…uh…the little guy has that fire…moving thing. You saw that a while ago, right? That wasn’t just me, right?”
“No, that wasn’t just you,” Right said, watching the crowd of contestant and robots turn the corner. “But for one thing, fire can’t exactly hurt us so he can’t really weaponize your fire against us as far as I see and for another, he seems a little bit too panicky to even think about doing anything with fire besides running away from it.”
Rong thought about this a little harder, but really, she wasn’t the thinking type and the opportunity to SET FIRE TO EVERYTHING was just too good to pass up, consequences be damned, and if it does turn out bad, she could actually push all the blame to Right. Blame Right for once! My god, she almost didn’t think of that! This was just turning out better and better.
And so with no further contemplation (it would have been a little worrying had she actually pursued the act of contemplation even further), Rong breathed fire onto the masses.
“You should probably make it hot enough to melt metal,” Right suggested rather unnecessarily, for in her eagerness to raze the whole damn place to the ground, she was melting pretty much everything. Realizing that this likely included the platform which they were standing on, Right flew upwards and, with a few bursts of speed, reached the ceiling, decided he didn’t want to keep holding all of them up, and turned into a grappling hook and dug himself into whatever this ceiling was made of. Rong was happy with this, as this gave her a better angle to SET FIRE TO EVERYTHING. And thus, engrossed in this important task, Rong didn’t really notice that her original target had already gone through the panic cycle twice, reached a door after many panicked flailing, and ran through it in a panicked manner. As an afterthought, he slammed it shut behind him.
As Right was also too busy staring at the ceiling, Eemp was the only one to really notice this happening. After considering this matter for a few moments, already an impressive feat considering it had straw for brains, and evidently decided on something, for he started swinging his legs.
After a while, Rong stopped SETTING FIRE TO EVERYTHING and, annoyed, looked up towards Right. “It’s throwing off my aaaiiiim!” she whined. And after a moment, Right let go and transformed back to himself again.
“And that wasn’t exactly easy on my jaw,” he commented. “I do believe dear old Eemp is trying to get us to do something.”
“Well, maybe it should stop so that I can actually aim,” Rong snapped.
“Now, now, perhaps it actually has something important to tell us. And considering it acts as our legs, we sort of have some sort of obligation to figure out what it wants. Also, I am now unbelievably bored. Come on, I’m pretty sure it wants us to go that way…”
------------------------------
It took some fumbling about, but Jordan actually managed to safely take his inhaler out of his pocket and not drop it on the floor. Though instead of using it, he just stared at it for a disconcertingly long amount of time, as though he had never seen it before. He couldn’t help but realize that he had never once used it throughout this entire battle, despite forests and fires and forest fires and giant statues and crap, he had apparently forgotten that sometimes, during stressful situations, he would need an inhaler.
For whatever reason, this calmed Jordan down and he pocketed the inhaler again with little fumbling and a clearer state of mind. Now was probably a good time to go ahead and see where he had ended up, then.
Well, for one thing, there certainly were a lot of books. For another, there were no longer any sort of moving being that wanted to kill him. Things were looking up.