Re: VENDETTA!!! [S!2 Round 1 ~ Presidentialgon]
04-12-2012, 08:24 AM
Originally posted on MSPA by The Deleter.
“Cursssesss! Johnny Raptor hasss defeated my finessst henchman! But no matter! Sssoon, I will have completed my ultimate plan, yesss…”
The mysterious figure rambled on in this vein for some time, but he’s not Johnny Raptor so we’ll ignore him for the moment.
--
Everyone’s attention was suddenly taken up by the announcement over the intercoms.
“Exida Exis is coming for them. I am coming for them. And they had best pray to whatever heathen gods they worship that I am not the one who finds them.”
Johnny frowned. There wasn’t an Exida Exis in his rogue’s gallery. His mind pinwheeled for a bit as it tried to make links, create a new villain or rename an old one. And then a memory came up – a deer, a white stag, wearing a wreath of laurels and with an expression of boredom and contempt.
“Not this shitbucket,” groaned Grendel.
“Language!”
“Whatever, kid. Two Personalities in one building is too much for me.”
Johnny didn’t hear that, but he felt the same sentiment. So, the deer had taken control of the facility, eh? Obviously on the payroll of Viper. Some sort of wild animal allegiance – the birds and woodlands animals joining the foul reptiles! What had he ever done to them? He restricted his wildlife-targeted violence to big cats and bears only! Okay, there was that one time he stepped on a mouse, but that was an accident and it had never known what had hit it.
This line of thought was incredibly stupid. Unfortunately, Johnny Raptor didn’t have an inner critic to tell him this, so he zoned out for a bit, mentally cursing all wildlife everywhere.
“What’s a Personality?”
“’s a technical term for a person with an extrasensory influence on others. Think of it as a really pissed-off version of charisma. Or a bratty kid poking you and demanding sweets. An' that antlered asshole's got Personality dancing in his voice like someone put too much cream in a twinkie. I'm pretty much the only reason you aren't worshipping at his feet right now.”
[color=#99z8rz]Felgurd stood still. It presumed that the people it were currently not threats to it, and judging by the way the man called Johnny Raptor had introduced himself, might even be possible allies. They would be interesting to follow, at least. And it wasn’t going to let them move on if it could help it.
Johnny had offered it his hand. Felgurd decided it would take them later, but not now. That would cause unnecessary offence. The boy’s hands were very interesting too. They were young, but made old by use and age, and they had a fair few scars and cuts on them. They would be interesting to add, but Felgurd was no collector and would rather not remove those hands unless it was called for. Instead, it went amongst the unconscious guards and began methodically ripping their hands off instead, adding to its own bulk. There was definitely going to be more conflict in the future, and the more mass it had the better.[/color]
Artemis and Grendel paused in their discussion on the nature of hypersensory charisma and the many forms it took to watch Felgurd do its thing. Faint horror was etched on the boy’s paling face.
“Wha- what is it doing?!”
“I’m as confused as you are, kid.”
“S- stop that!”
Felgurd lifted its face to stare at Artemis.
“Probably not the best plan you’ve had, there.”
Johnny seemed to ignore the hand-ripping entirely. Instead, he returned from his bizarre train of thought, turned around and clapped his hands theatrically, bringing attention back to himself.
“Alright, everyone, change of plans! That Don what’s-his-face guy said we had to find whoever was in charge of this place, and who should make our jobs easier but that bloody deer! So, now we know he’s in charge, I say it would be a good idea to have a good old-fashioned team-up!”
He almost bounded between the two other competitors and clapped a hand on their shoulders. Artemis almost buckled and fell over. Felgurd gave the hand a blank stare.
“Felgurd, this is Artemis. Odd name for a boy, I know, but he’ll be useful in the future. Maybe I’ll make him my sidekick. Artemis, this is Felgurd. I suspect he’ll be handy at some point.”
“That’s not even remotely funny.”
If Johnny heard Grendel at all, he didn’t show it. He turned and pointed dramatically down the corridor, radiating sheer confidence and Johnny Raptor-ness from every pore.
“Alright, men! Let’s go bag us a hunting trophy! JOHNNYYYYYY RAPTOOOOOOOOORRRRRR!!”
He charged off, and Artemis reluctantly followed him at Grendel’s urging. Felgurd paused, unsure of itself, and then loped along behind them.
Zeus, left alone in the corridor, got up, padded over to where Crotalis was knotted around the window frame, and began to bat at its tail.
“Stop that.”
--
There was a memory floating around in Johnny’s head, one of many that he simply didn’t have access to because he was far too busy being himself. He didn’t have time to stand around and reminisce, and even if he did, he wouldn’t be able to get at this memory anyway, because it wasn’t his.
It wasn’t a very big memory.
It went something lik̶e t̨h͡i҉s.
*-
Sun, warmth, grass. A river, flashing like diamonds.
“Will I see you again, J̡̧̕o̡͜͠͠͡h̀͢n͢?̛́́͘͢”
He looks down at ḩ̵̶͞͞e̸̡̛͞͞r҉̧҉͘͟ ̶̧̀͜͠f̴̧́̕a͠҉̢c̶͟e̵̶̢͡, smells her sickly sweetness of perfume and nicotine, smiles his weak smile.
“O̢͘f̨͘͘ ç͞͏o͟u͘r͝s̛e̡̡͡ ͞y͠o͟u͏̶͏ ̧w̢͘i̵͝l̛͢l̴̵…̧”
The name is lost. The smile isn’t.
“Good.”
The rest is lost.
-*
On reflection, it was probably a good thing that Johnny Raptor couldn’t remember this.
As of this moment, he was currently turning a corner with his newfound team. Team-ups felt good. He was usually in charge of them, and bossing people around was one of his many specialties. He remembered the really good call he made in that fight against the Devious Dinosaurs, when he ordered Elephant Man to break that water pipe. Of course dinosaurs were vulnerable to cold water! It had been a stroke of genius on his part. It was in his mental trophy room with all the others.
Admittedly he couldn’t see how the kid was going to be any use in a fight at all – Crotalis would have eaten that little stripling alive if he hadn’t been there. Felgurd, however, was good solid dumb muscle, which was always required on a team. All they needed now was a nerdy type and a girl and they were ready to –
“Holy shit!”
There was a man at the end of the corridor. He was the biggest, ugliest man Johnny had ever seen, and he was riding the biggest, ugliest horse ever. This was the horse that took other horse’s lunch money when it was a pony and grew up to be a Hell’s Angel. The man was no slouch either, looking like a cross between Ghengis Kahn and a brick shithouse. He appeared to be carrying a scientist slung over one soldier. No accounting for taste, Johnny supposed.
Khagan grinned his biggest, toothiest grin yet.
“Hello! Glad to find you. You are part of game, yes? Maybe you understand rules better than I do! What are rules of this game?”
Johnny opened his mouth to answer, and felt Artemis’ hand on his shoulder.
“Hello, Johnny Raptor. My name is Grendel, I’m a demon of the Second Circle, and you now have the critical task of telling this guy the fact that this is a death tournament without him deciding to turn us into a bloodied smear on the ground, because there is NO way we can fight this guy, and we wouldn’t get thirty yards if we ran. Good fucking luck.”
“Cursssesss! Johnny Raptor hasss defeated my finessst henchman! But no matter! Sssoon, I will have completed my ultimate plan, yesss…”
The mysterious figure rambled on in this vein for some time, but he’s not Johnny Raptor so we’ll ignore him for the moment.
--
Everyone’s attention was suddenly taken up by the announcement over the intercoms.
“Exida Exis is coming for them. I am coming for them. And they had best pray to whatever heathen gods they worship that I am not the one who finds them.”
Johnny frowned. There wasn’t an Exida Exis in his rogue’s gallery. His mind pinwheeled for a bit as it tried to make links, create a new villain or rename an old one. And then a memory came up – a deer, a white stag, wearing a wreath of laurels and with an expression of boredom and contempt.
“Not this shitbucket,” groaned Grendel.
“Language!”
“Whatever, kid. Two Personalities in one building is too much for me.”
Johnny didn’t hear that, but he felt the same sentiment. So, the deer had taken control of the facility, eh? Obviously on the payroll of Viper. Some sort of wild animal allegiance – the birds and woodlands animals joining the foul reptiles! What had he ever done to them? He restricted his wildlife-targeted violence to big cats and bears only! Okay, there was that one time he stepped on a mouse, but that was an accident and it had never known what had hit it.
This line of thought was incredibly stupid. Unfortunately, Johnny Raptor didn’t have an inner critic to tell him this, so he zoned out for a bit, mentally cursing all wildlife everywhere.
“What’s a Personality?”
“’s a technical term for a person with an extrasensory influence on others. Think of it as a really pissed-off version of charisma. Or a bratty kid poking you and demanding sweets. An' that antlered asshole's got Personality dancing in his voice like someone put too much cream in a twinkie. I'm pretty much the only reason you aren't worshipping at his feet right now.”
[color=#99z8rz]Felgurd stood still. It presumed that the people it were currently not threats to it, and judging by the way the man called Johnny Raptor had introduced himself, might even be possible allies. They would be interesting to follow, at least. And it wasn’t going to let them move on if it could help it.
Johnny had offered it his hand. Felgurd decided it would take them later, but not now. That would cause unnecessary offence. The boy’s hands were very interesting too. They were young, but made old by use and age, and they had a fair few scars and cuts on them. They would be interesting to add, but Felgurd was no collector and would rather not remove those hands unless it was called for. Instead, it went amongst the unconscious guards and began methodically ripping their hands off instead, adding to its own bulk. There was definitely going to be more conflict in the future, and the more mass it had the better.[/color]
Artemis and Grendel paused in their discussion on the nature of hypersensory charisma and the many forms it took to watch Felgurd do its thing. Faint horror was etched on the boy’s paling face.
“Wha- what is it doing?!”
“I’m as confused as you are, kid.”
“S- stop that!”
Felgurd lifted its face to stare at Artemis.
“Probably not the best plan you’ve had, there.”
Johnny seemed to ignore the hand-ripping entirely. Instead, he returned from his bizarre train of thought, turned around and clapped his hands theatrically, bringing attention back to himself.
“Alright, everyone, change of plans! That Don what’s-his-face guy said we had to find whoever was in charge of this place, and who should make our jobs easier but that bloody deer! So, now we know he’s in charge, I say it would be a good idea to have a good old-fashioned team-up!”
He almost bounded between the two other competitors and clapped a hand on their shoulders. Artemis almost buckled and fell over. Felgurd gave the hand a blank stare.
“Felgurd, this is Artemis. Odd name for a boy, I know, but he’ll be useful in the future. Maybe I’ll make him my sidekick. Artemis, this is Felgurd. I suspect he’ll be handy at some point.”
“That’s not even remotely funny.”
If Johnny heard Grendel at all, he didn’t show it. He turned and pointed dramatically down the corridor, radiating sheer confidence and Johnny Raptor-ness from every pore.
“Alright, men! Let’s go bag us a hunting trophy! JOHNNYYYYYY RAPTOOOOOOOOORRRRRR!!”
He charged off, and Artemis reluctantly followed him at Grendel’s urging. Felgurd paused, unsure of itself, and then loped along behind them.
Zeus, left alone in the corridor, got up, padded over to where Crotalis was knotted around the window frame, and began to bat at its tail.
“Stop that.”
--
There was a memory floating around in Johnny’s head, one of many that he simply didn’t have access to because he was far too busy being himself. He didn’t have time to stand around and reminisce, and even if he did, he wouldn’t be able to get at this memory anyway, because it wasn’t his.
It wasn’t a very big memory.
It went something lik̶e t̨h͡i҉s.
*-
Sun, warmth, grass. A river, flashing like diamonds.
“Will I see you again, J̡̧̕o̡͜͠͠͡h̀͢n͢?̛́́͘͢”
He looks down at ḩ̵̶͞͞e̸̡̛͞͞r҉̧҉͘͟ ̶̧̀͜͠f̴̧́̕a͠҉̢c̶͟e̵̶̢͡, smells her sickly sweetness of perfume and nicotine, smiles his weak smile.
“O̢͘f̨͘͘ ç͞͏o͟u͘r͝s̛e̡̡͡ ͞y͠o͟u͏̶͏ ̧w̢͘i̵͝l̛͢l̴̵…̧”
The name is lost. The smile isn’t.
“Good.”
The rest is lost.
-*
On reflection, it was probably a good thing that Johnny Raptor couldn’t remember this.
As of this moment, he was currently turning a corner with his newfound team. Team-ups felt good. He was usually in charge of them, and bossing people around was one of his many specialties. He remembered the really good call he made in that fight against the Devious Dinosaurs, when he ordered Elephant Man to break that water pipe. Of course dinosaurs were vulnerable to cold water! It had been a stroke of genius on his part. It was in his mental trophy room with all the others.
Admittedly he couldn’t see how the kid was going to be any use in a fight at all – Crotalis would have eaten that little stripling alive if he hadn’t been there. Felgurd, however, was good solid dumb muscle, which was always required on a team. All they needed now was a nerdy type and a girl and they were ready to –
“Holy shit!”
There was a man at the end of the corridor. He was the biggest, ugliest man Johnny had ever seen, and he was riding the biggest, ugliest horse ever. This was the horse that took other horse’s lunch money when it was a pony and grew up to be a Hell’s Angel. The man was no slouch either, looking like a cross between Ghengis Kahn and a brick shithouse. He appeared to be carrying a scientist slung over one soldier. No accounting for taste, Johnny supposed.
Khagan grinned his biggest, toothiest grin yet.
“Hello! Glad to find you. You are part of game, yes? Maybe you understand rules better than I do! What are rules of this game?”
Johnny opened his mouth to answer, and felt Artemis’ hand on his shoulder.
“Hello, Johnny Raptor. My name is Grendel, I’m a demon of the Second Circle, and you now have the critical task of telling this guy the fact that this is a death tournament without him deciding to turn us into a bloodied smear on the ground, because there is NO way we can fight this guy, and we wouldn’t get thirty yards if we ran. Good fucking luck.”