Re: DEATHGAME 9000 [S!3] Round One: Gamexus X99
02-23-2012, 09:28 PM
Originally posted on MSPA by Lord Paradise.
Clopclop clopclop clopclop clopclop clopclop
It occurred to John Fairlot that this was the first time he’d actually really seen Trisha on account of how the first time he’d seen her was in the dark and the second he only saw her eyes. Still he was quite certain that she looked like shit.
“Why” he asked wary of the distant galloping (trotting?) sounds “Did you give me a syringe that turned the monsters into clowns?”
Trisha sipped at her tea. “Clowns, huh? Are you scared of clowns?”
Eight years old. The carnival. Crystal told him to stop crying. “They’re... so happy” he explained to the veterinarian. “Anybody who is that happy has to be up to something, right?”
“Focus, John. You gave the gene to one of them, but they all turned into clowns?”
“About half of the ones I’ve seen since then have been clowns, yeah.” John lied down on the couch and the fabric of the couch was scratchy and uncomfortable.
Clip clop clip clop clip clop clip clop
“Okay. All that was supposed to do was turn the one specimen pink so we could track it. I knew nothing about these things’ life cycles. Things have changed now.”
John closed his eyes. “How so? What are you trying to do?”
“I’m trying to fix my horse” snapped Trisha “Haven’t you been paying any attention at all? Look. Obviously we’re looking at a completely new form of life. Like an ultra-hivemind or, hmm, I don’t know. More like a hive-soul or hive-DNN. These creatures spring up and pattern themselves on your unconscious fears, or your sister’s maybe, and then they try to kill you. Why do they try to kill you?”
“I don’t know. Why does anything try to kill anyone? That’s just how the world works.”
Trisha considered this. “To a point” she admitted “But that answer doesn’t really satisfy me. Obviously these things have senses we don’t. Some sort of psychic whatever, it allows them to coordinate and also to read your fears. So what would your psyche taste like to them?”
Clippity bzzzzz clopclop hhlhlrraaaauurghg clopclop
John licked his lips and tried to think some things. “Not very good,” he concluded.
“Maybe it hurts them. Maybe you’re so fucked up and so terrified all the time that they have to seek you out and kill you just to regain control of their shapeshifting whatever. Which brings us to the obvious question.”
“The obvious question,” repeated John, not really listening.
“Yes, the obvious question, which is: when I inject this sample into Hypocrisy, he’ll become a shapeshifter, that much is obvious, but will he also be forced to manifest your subconscious perversions? And then when he kills you, will he be able to turn into a good litle horsey again?”
“Nothing’s going to kill me,” mumbled John. “I decided. I need to find Crystal first.”
“Whinny” “Of course you do, John. You need to save your little sister, just like when you were kids and Daddy would get drunk. You know everyone in this town knows all about you just as if you pissed your name in the snow. Hold still, Hypocrisy. Just a little prick.”
John opened his eyes and sat up. There was the horse, and it looked pretty much like he thought it would, with too many faces and too many eyes even for the faces it had and too many legs and a stunted pair of butterfly wings on its back. It wasn’t scary, really, just sad-looking; it was broken. Then Trisha injected the sample he’d given her into Hypocrisy’s neck and that was when things got scary.
“See, John,” Trisha said. “I want you to know this isn’t just about my horse. This is about the whole environment. We’re both invasive species here, and you can see what your presence is doing to the whole town. I tried to keep my impact to a minimum but accidentally may have created an army of evil clowns, so clearly it’s time I took a more direct approach in fixing things. Starting with getting rid of you. Go get ‘em, Hypocrisy.”
Words cannot describe exactly what was happening with the horse but it involved tentacles. It said, “Neigh” and charged
* * * * *
A few minutes later
* * * * *
Clip clop clip clop clip clop clip clop
John led the horse by hand back into the waiting room. He was hurt pretty bad—John that is not the horse, who was fine. Trisha had apparently just been sitting in her armchair through this whole ordeal not doing much or thinking much or expecting much of anything because when she saw that her horse had been fixed and John was still alive she didn’t look confused or even surprised per se but merely elated.
“Hippocrates!” she exclaimed, getting up and stroking her pet’s mane. “Good as new. Thanks, John. What happened out there?”
“You tried to kill me” intoned John.
“Uh-huh. I think... I think being an invasive species is a two-way street. There’s something in the air here and my brain is overgrowing all over the place. I should probably find some other part of the maze, now that Hippocrates is okay. Aren’t you, boy?”
“Whinny”
“Good.” Clinging to her horse’s neck, the doctor sniffled a bit. “How’d you fix him? This goes against everything I’ve seen. He’s breathing better than he was before I gave him the caterpillar trait.”
“I injected the horse with some of my sister’s tears that I found,” explained John. “It, uh, it seemed like the right thing to do at the time.”
“That makes no sense, but okay. John. Do you feel something in the air?” She was right; the air was quivering somehow, which was a feeling he usually associated with going to the Bad Side of Town but sort of opposite. There was a white light and a sound of sirens.
Some time may have passed? Now Trisha was hugging him with a chimpanzee in a strange helmet tugging at her elbow and Hippocrates sniffing her hair. She smelled like Crystal, or maybe the horse did. Either way, for the first time in years he felt like he’d actually done something good for anyone and maybe justified his place in the universe, and it was a sick, sort of nauseous feeling.
Trisha kissed John on the cheek. “There are some things you should know, before I go,” she said. “I’m only one of eight, and we’re all here together in the Deadly Maze. The Amazing set us all up. Understand?”
“No” answered John.
“Ooh ooh aaah!” “Neigh” “Okay. You go find your sister, and then follow me out. I’ll be looking for the other seven. It’s not a proper maze without an exit, right? So there’s hope.” The veterinarian the horse and the ape turned their back to John and walked through the white light and disappeared, leaving him alone once again in the dark.
* * * * *
As soon as Trisha got out of that town, her thought processes got a lot clearer, though not quite clear enough to throw her into an existential meltdown at the thought of battling to the death against incredibly dangerous individuals for whom the rules of logic to which she had become accustomed didn’t apply. So that was good.
She was in an endless expanse of tall grass, and nobody seemed to be around, so the veterinarian took the opportunity to take stock. She sat down on the ground, produced her Swish! Army Knife and hit the Record button. “Dear Diary,” she said aloud:
“I don’t think I’ve written any diary entries in the last couple hours, which is strange, since I’d been going through a rough time and was mostly on my own. I guess I wasn’t thinking straight.
So this morning got off to a bad start right away. I burnt my hand trying to pull some muffins out of the oven, Charlie still hasn’t called me back, and then an extradimensional being called the Amazing pulled me out of the universe and dumped me in a labyrinth of death with seven other people and we’re all supposed to kill each other. So that’s what I’ve been doing since about ten this morning. Hippocrates is here too. I just got out of this part of the maze where... well, I don’t think I’m ready to talk about it yet, but I think it might have been for the best. After what I’ve just experienced, I don’t know that I have it in me to be afraid anymore, you know? Which is an asset. Anyway, Diary, I’m in this new place that is sort of beautiful and peaceful and the weather’s perfect, so things are looking up. I’ll get back to you after I find something to eat.”
She stood, stuffed the recorder into her pants and examined the ape. “Now, let’s have a look at you.” The helmet it wore was held in place by a simple chinstrap, but the chimp slapped away any attempts of hers to interact with it. “Hmm. Well, fine, you can keep the hat. My name’s Trisha. Have you ever ridden a horse before?”
“Eeh oh”
“No, of course you haven’t. You’re just a little simian, aren’t you? Well, I’m going to be riding for a while, so you can either walk alongside or hop on back, okay, little fella?” Trisha mounted Hippocrates, and the ape loyally clambered on behind her, putting its arms around her waist. “Good boy. So it’s the three of us, then. Let’s head east, Hippocrates, I have no idea where we’re going but we should keep the sun at our backs.” The horse turned in the direction specified and trudged through the long grass, its rider taking in the sun and the sky and peering over the horizon for the faintest sign of what was ahead of her.
Clopclop clopclop clopclop clopclop clopclop
It occurred to John Fairlot that this was the first time he’d actually really seen Trisha on account of how the first time he’d seen her was in the dark and the second he only saw her eyes. Still he was quite certain that she looked like shit.
“Why” he asked wary of the distant galloping (trotting?) sounds “Did you give me a syringe that turned the monsters into clowns?”
Trisha sipped at her tea. “Clowns, huh? Are you scared of clowns?”
Eight years old. The carnival. Crystal told him to stop crying. “They’re... so happy” he explained to the veterinarian. “Anybody who is that happy has to be up to something, right?”
“Focus, John. You gave the gene to one of them, but they all turned into clowns?”
“About half of the ones I’ve seen since then have been clowns, yeah.” John lied down on the couch and the fabric of the couch was scratchy and uncomfortable.
Clip clop clip clop clip clop clip clop
“Okay. All that was supposed to do was turn the one specimen pink so we could track it. I knew nothing about these things’ life cycles. Things have changed now.”
John closed his eyes. “How so? What are you trying to do?”
“I’m trying to fix my horse” snapped Trisha “Haven’t you been paying any attention at all? Look. Obviously we’re looking at a completely new form of life. Like an ultra-hivemind or, hmm, I don’t know. More like a hive-soul or hive-DNN. These creatures spring up and pattern themselves on your unconscious fears, or your sister’s maybe, and then they try to kill you. Why do they try to kill you?”
“I don’t know. Why does anything try to kill anyone? That’s just how the world works.”
Trisha considered this. “To a point” she admitted “But that answer doesn’t really satisfy me. Obviously these things have senses we don’t. Some sort of psychic whatever, it allows them to coordinate and also to read your fears. So what would your psyche taste like to them?”
Clippity bzzzzz clopclop hhlhlrraaaauurghg clopclop
John licked his lips and tried to think some things. “Not very good,” he concluded.
“Maybe it hurts them. Maybe you’re so fucked up and so terrified all the time that they have to seek you out and kill you just to regain control of their shapeshifting whatever. Which brings us to the obvious question.”
“The obvious question,” repeated John, not really listening.
“Yes, the obvious question, which is: when I inject this sample into Hypocrisy, he’ll become a shapeshifter, that much is obvious, but will he also be forced to manifest your subconscious perversions? And then when he kills you, will he be able to turn into a good litle horsey again?”
“Nothing’s going to kill me,” mumbled John. “I decided. I need to find Crystal first.”
“Whinny” “Of course you do, John. You need to save your little sister, just like when you were kids and Daddy would get drunk. You know everyone in this town knows all about you just as if you pissed your name in the snow. Hold still, Hypocrisy. Just a little prick.”
John opened his eyes and sat up. There was the horse, and it looked pretty much like he thought it would, with too many faces and too many eyes even for the faces it had and too many legs and a stunted pair of butterfly wings on its back. It wasn’t scary, really, just sad-looking; it was broken. Then Trisha injected the sample he’d given her into Hypocrisy’s neck and that was when things got scary.
“See, John,” Trisha said. “I want you to know this isn’t just about my horse. This is about the whole environment. We’re both invasive species here, and you can see what your presence is doing to the whole town. I tried to keep my impact to a minimum but accidentally may have created an army of evil clowns, so clearly it’s time I took a more direct approach in fixing things. Starting with getting rid of you. Go get ‘em, Hypocrisy.”
Words cannot describe exactly what was happening with the horse but it involved tentacles. It said, “Neigh” and charged
* * * * *
A few minutes later
* * * * *
Clip clop clip clop clip clop clip clop
John led the horse by hand back into the waiting room. He was hurt pretty bad—John that is not the horse, who was fine. Trisha had apparently just been sitting in her armchair through this whole ordeal not doing much or thinking much or expecting much of anything because when she saw that her horse had been fixed and John was still alive she didn’t look confused or even surprised per se but merely elated.
“Hippocrates!” she exclaimed, getting up and stroking her pet’s mane. “Good as new. Thanks, John. What happened out there?”
“You tried to kill me” intoned John.
“Uh-huh. I think... I think being an invasive species is a two-way street. There’s something in the air here and my brain is overgrowing all over the place. I should probably find some other part of the maze, now that Hippocrates is okay. Aren’t you, boy?”
“Whinny”
“Good.” Clinging to her horse’s neck, the doctor sniffled a bit. “How’d you fix him? This goes against everything I’ve seen. He’s breathing better than he was before I gave him the caterpillar trait.”
“I injected the horse with some of my sister’s tears that I found,” explained John. “It, uh, it seemed like the right thing to do at the time.”
“That makes no sense, but okay. John. Do you feel something in the air?” She was right; the air was quivering somehow, which was a feeling he usually associated with going to the Bad Side of Town but sort of opposite. There was a white light and a sound of sirens.
Some time may have passed? Now Trisha was hugging him with a chimpanzee in a strange helmet tugging at her elbow and Hippocrates sniffing her hair. She smelled like Crystal, or maybe the horse did. Either way, for the first time in years he felt like he’d actually done something good for anyone and maybe justified his place in the universe, and it was a sick, sort of nauseous feeling.
Trisha kissed John on the cheek. “There are some things you should know, before I go,” she said. “I’m only one of eight, and we’re all here together in the Deadly Maze. The Amazing set us all up. Understand?”
“No” answered John.
“Ooh ooh aaah!” “Neigh” “Okay. You go find your sister, and then follow me out. I’ll be looking for the other seven. It’s not a proper maze without an exit, right? So there’s hope.” The veterinarian the horse and the ape turned their back to John and walked through the white light and disappeared, leaving him alone once again in the dark.
* * * * *
As soon as Trisha got out of that town, her thought processes got a lot clearer, though not quite clear enough to throw her into an existential meltdown at the thought of battling to the death against incredibly dangerous individuals for whom the rules of logic to which she had become accustomed didn’t apply. So that was good.
She was in an endless expanse of tall grass, and nobody seemed to be around, so the veterinarian took the opportunity to take stock. She sat down on the ground, produced her Swish! Army Knife and hit the Record button. “Dear Diary,” she said aloud:
“I don’t think I’ve written any diary entries in the last couple hours, which is strange, since I’d been going through a rough time and was mostly on my own. I guess I wasn’t thinking straight.
So this morning got off to a bad start right away. I burnt my hand trying to pull some muffins out of the oven, Charlie still hasn’t called me back, and then an extradimensional being called the Amazing pulled me out of the universe and dumped me in a labyrinth of death with seven other people and we’re all supposed to kill each other. So that’s what I’ve been doing since about ten this morning. Hippocrates is here too. I just got out of this part of the maze where... well, I don’t think I’m ready to talk about it yet, but I think it might have been for the best. After what I’ve just experienced, I don’t know that I have it in me to be afraid anymore, you know? Which is an asset. Anyway, Diary, I’m in this new place that is sort of beautiful and peaceful and the weather’s perfect, so things are looking up. I’ll get back to you after I find something to eat.”
She stood, stuffed the recorder into her pants and examined the ape. “Now, let’s have a look at you.” The helmet it wore was held in place by a simple chinstrap, but the chimp slapped away any attempts of hers to interact with it. “Hmm. Well, fine, you can keep the hat. My name’s Trisha. Have you ever ridden a horse before?”
“Eeh oh”
“No, of course you haven’t. You’re just a little simian, aren’t you? Well, I’m going to be riding for a while, so you can either walk alongside or hop on back, okay, little fella?” Trisha mounted Hippocrates, and the ape loyally clambered on behind her, putting its arms around her waist. “Good boy. So it’s the three of us, then. Let’s head east, Hippocrates, I have no idea where we’re going but we should keep the sun at our backs.” The horse turned in the direction specified and trudged through the long grass, its rider taking in the sun and the sky and peering over the horizon for the faintest sign of what was ahead of her.