Re: THIS PROGRAM HAS BEEN CANCELED [S!1][ROUND TWO: ETA CARINA]
06-26-2012, 05:57 PM
Originally posted on MSPA by Pharmacy.
Several rooms away, Tschichold was incredibly displeased.
Could his luck get any worse? First, the artist had had the worst epiphany ever (HE WAS IN THE DYING GAMES). Then, some wizard chump came along and vomited words and other things onto him (Tschichold was considering suing). Now, some sweet lovechild of Power Girl and a Jackson Pollock dropped in without permission. Oh wait, that was Freefall - and some ghetto-ass robo-pal along with her.
“Who,” the artist demanded, punctuating his question with a finger-point. “Are you.”
“Wow,” Freefall condescendingly returned the point. “Did all the artsy stuff push out the rest of your brain or something?”
“Nooooooo, you stupid bitch, I know who you are,” Tschichold swore, eliciting a glower from Freefall. It was hard to tell if the heroine was silently reprimanding him or the curse word itself, but he could not bring himself to care. “I mean the robot behind you.”
“Woooooah” Tammy sauntered around the art gallery-bathroom. “What the fuck, man,” the robot practically strutted its stuff despite lack of proper legs. “What. The. flying fuck." Although he practically hated the walking can from the beginning, Tschichold had to begrudgingly admit: the robot had some swag."Who did this shit.” A finger jabbed at one of the many errant murals that populated the bathroom. “Who made this mess.” Tammy scanned the audience for a nonexistent answer. “WHO EXPLODED.”
<font color="#814444">“NOTHING EXPLODED," the painter snarled, his finger, still outstretched, dithering on the decision of which fist to point at. "Everything was fine until YOU fucking came in with those taser hands--”
The robot’s head glared downwards, “Who do you think you are.”
“Tschic…hold?” The artist chuckled nervously as he realized how ridiculously huge Tammy’s fist was especially when viewed in proximity of his face. At (very) close glance, the palm was like a military base and each digit was like a tiny nuclear warhead. Tschichold would have gone on with the comparisons but to be honest, he wasn’t feeling so cocky anymore – especially since the robot’s hand was a couple of inches away from flattening his squishy head. “Also I asked you first. You know. That.” His voice faltered along with his confidence. “Yeeah.”
“Chick. Cold.” Tammy jived each syllable of the mispronunciation with what looked like a gangster hand gesture of disapproval. “Fancy name for a fancy man. Say, how did these fancy pants got on a girl like you?”
“What,” Tschichold could not believe his ears. “What. What did you call me.”
“Chick. Lady. Guuuuuuuuuurl,” The robot cocked his head, snapped his fingers and pointed Tschic-wards. “Those hips don’t lie, pal.”
“Holy SHIT.” Tschichold stumbled backwards in bewildered shock. He simply could not believe his ears. “AARON.”
“Um. Yeah.” The wizard murmured, as he was frozen a couple of inches away from the bathroom door. Aaron decided it was prudent to abscond away from the hi-tech toilets to sweet, sweet freedom. Admittedly, that was a rather smart move on the wizard’s part considering that the hallways were the furthest away from the killer electric robot. “Don’t mind me. If er-" A wary pause. "If you don't mind."
<font color="#814444">“WHAT DID HE CALL ME.” The artist demanded at top of his lungs.
“Well,” Aaron coughed briefly, readjusting his robes a little more than necessary. The wizard was practically a poster child of sullen reluctance. To be fair, Tschichold felt the same way too. “A girl.”
“HOLY SHIT REALLY.”
“Well to be honest.” There was a scholarly (and wizardly) pause. “You do kind of look like one.”
Tschichold was shocked - incredibly so. He could have been more shocked if he exploded in a glory of randomosity or spontaneously gave virginal birth to the Lord and Savior’s Child but it was pretty drastic indeed. Slack-jawed and with palms on his ears, the artist slowly turned towards Freefall. <font color="#7474FF">The Delaunay-esque superheroine simply shrugged. Tschichold decided to interpret that as a “yes.”
“OH MY GOD,” Tschichold shrilled.</font>
“Are you okay,” Aaron asked.
“OH MY GOD.”
“Um.”
“OH. MY. FUCKING GOD.”
“I guess you aren’t.”</font>
“YOU. SHUT UP,” Tschichold snarled. “You have NO IDEA. NO. IDEA.” He placed a lot of stress on the last word. “WHAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH.”
“Well, from what I see,” Tammy waved his gargantuan palm daintily as though he had to call the sass taxi. ” This would have been pretty hilarious if the robot’s fists were not voltage hazards. “You just had a bad case of freaks like a sissy cuz’ an organic exploded on you.”
“YOU ARE NOT HELPING,” Tschichold snapped.
“Well, you are a little girl.”
“What the—THAT DOES IT.”
For the purpose of petty revenge, Tschichold made the tactically suicidal decision to launch himself onto Tammy. It was a noble endeavor considering the odds were stacked against him, but it was also incredibly stupid considering the robot was about two times the height and size of him. The artist immediately regretted that decision as he soon as he found himself in the vice-grip of the enormous automaton.
“Woah. Woah. Woah.” The robot wagged his finger. “Hold your phone-horses.”
All Tschichold could think of was how incredibly lame the catchphrase was. He would have kicked its stupid face in punishment if his feet were a little closer. “I don’t have any phones.” The artist strained his bottom half in an attempt to do so anyway. “Or horses.”
“That’s a really lame comeback,” Tammy scoffed.
“I’m an artist not a comedian,” Tschichold continue to wriggle like a slippery black fish. “Get your facts rightckt.”
Tschichold found his breath shorter and his movements tighter as the cage of metal fingers tightened around him. The artist glanced downwards and saw the rather smug expression on the robot’s face – or was that the hallucinations again. However, the facts are there: that robot was strangling him. Tschichold would have protested if his lung capacity was larger.
“You better calm down,” the robot taunted. “Otherwise, the next person who’s going to explode is you.”
“No. One,” Tschichold gagged. “Exploded.”
“The evidence’s right there, lady,” Tammy pointed at the wizard vomit on his chest.
Tschichold open and closed his mouth as though he was a fish on dry land. If he did not get out in time, he would turn from Tschichold to Tschichoked-to-death – and a premature elimination was not a fate he wanted to ascribe to.
“Did you do this,” Tammy insisted.
Tschichold’s attention was elsewhere – namely on Freefall. Her expression was grim, her stance was very combat-like, and her skin was very, very dark. Honestly, the skin made an aesthetic contrast with her colorful super-suit, perfect for any art gallery or photo-shoot. However, this did not change the fact that she was very, very prepared to make a junk-heap of the robot.
“Oh no,” Tschichold found the oxygen to make his futile plead against Freefall. “No no no no no no no no—”
“I got lie detectors in my motherboard, pal,” Tammy jeered. “You can’t hide the truth away fro—”</font>
<font color="#7474FF">Tammy was explosively interrupted by the force of nature called Freefall. The aftershock was enough to shatter every fragile thing in the small (and very expensive) bathroom. Aaron flinched as every mirror, glass bulb, and toilet shattered at the same time. On the other hand, the exit was open (considering the entrance was a glass door). Careful not to get any glass snagged onto his robes, the wizard darted away to freedom.</font>
Meanwhile, Tschichold found himself being launched at a very high velocity. This was not exactly the most pleasant sensation - especially since the wall behind him was rapidly getting close at a painful pace. The end would not be pleasant and he was getting pretty angry. After all, this is mostly Little Miss Dense’s fault.
“HEY LADY,” Tschichold yelled to Freefall. “FUCK Y—”
Tschichold never finished that sentence.
---
Wizard robes were not designed for speediness but Aaron managed to get away – at least he rather want to think that way. Despite the countless amount of rooms he passed, the magician was not so sure if he was fully out of danger – especially with that killer electric robot. Aaron had seen what it had done and there was absolutely no way he was willing to let that robo-volt near him. The wizard need to get out fast. He could only escape --
– if he actually knew the directions, of course. In retrospect, he should have picked up a map or asked for directions, but on the other hand, everything in this damned casino was automated. Considering the behavior of Tammy earlier, Aaron was pretty sure that anything with even the thinnest wafer of artificial intelligence would turn him in a magical pancake.
The wizard had never felt this lost since freshman orientation. The bright lights. The multitudes of crowds. A whirlwind of confusion and unfamiliarity. All in all an incredibly unpleasant experience. Aaron’s heart began to pick up pace. He was getting desperate, he needed to run into someone, Someone to depend on. Someone to tell him the answers. Where was Change when he needed him.
Instead, Aaron found something else. The artificial sky was incredibly blue and the weather generators made things pleasant, but the suspiciously man-shaped hole nearby told something else. The tourists and staff were gawking around and in a needlessly spacious pool. A closer inspection revealed a rather spacey lady, a jellyfish…and a familiar looking person.
<font color="#099999">“Oh my gawd!” The lady’s blonde curls bouncing in unison with her excitement. “I think he’s dead!”
“I must be dead,” Tschichold groaned as he floated miserably. “Because I feel like hell.”
Aaron was not quite sure how to react.</font>
Several rooms away, Tschichold was incredibly displeased.
Could his luck get any worse? First, the artist had had the worst epiphany ever (HE WAS IN THE DYING GAMES). Then, some wizard chump came along and vomited words and other things onto him (Tschichold was considering suing). Now, some sweet lovechild of Power Girl and a Jackson Pollock dropped in without permission. Oh wait, that was Freefall - and some ghetto-ass robo-pal along with her.
“Who,” the artist demanded, punctuating his question with a finger-point. “Are you.”
“Wow,” Freefall condescendingly returned the point. “Did all the artsy stuff push out the rest of your brain or something?”
“Nooooooo, you stupid bitch, I know who you are,” Tschichold swore, eliciting a glower from Freefall. It was hard to tell if the heroine was silently reprimanding him or the curse word itself, but he could not bring himself to care. “I mean the robot behind you.”
“Woooooah” Tammy sauntered around the art gallery-bathroom. “What the fuck, man,” the robot practically strutted its stuff despite lack of proper legs. “What. The. flying fuck." Although he practically hated the walking can from the beginning, Tschichold had to begrudgingly admit: the robot had some swag."Who did this shit.” A finger jabbed at one of the many errant murals that populated the bathroom. “Who made this mess.” Tammy scanned the audience for a nonexistent answer. “WHO EXPLODED.”
<font color="#814444">“NOTHING EXPLODED," the painter snarled, his finger, still outstretched, dithering on the decision of which fist to point at. "Everything was fine until YOU fucking came in with those taser hands--”
The robot’s head glared downwards, “Who do you think you are.”
“Tschic…hold?” The artist chuckled nervously as he realized how ridiculously huge Tammy’s fist was especially when viewed in proximity of his face. At (very) close glance, the palm was like a military base and each digit was like a tiny nuclear warhead. Tschichold would have gone on with the comparisons but to be honest, he wasn’t feeling so cocky anymore – especially since the robot’s hand was a couple of inches away from flattening his squishy head. “Also I asked you first. You know. That.” His voice faltered along with his confidence. “Yeeah.”
“Chick. Cold.” Tammy jived each syllable of the mispronunciation with what looked like a gangster hand gesture of disapproval. “Fancy name for a fancy man. Say, how did these fancy pants got on a girl like you?”
“What,” Tschichold could not believe his ears. “What. What did you call me.”
“Chick. Lady. Guuuuuuuuuurl,” The robot cocked his head, snapped his fingers and pointed Tschic-wards. “Those hips don’t lie, pal.”
“Holy SHIT.” Tschichold stumbled backwards in bewildered shock. He simply could not believe his ears. “AARON.”
“Um. Yeah.” The wizard murmured, as he was frozen a couple of inches away from the bathroom door. Aaron decided it was prudent to abscond away from the hi-tech toilets to sweet, sweet freedom. Admittedly, that was a rather smart move on the wizard’s part considering that the hallways were the furthest away from the killer electric robot. “Don’t mind me. If er-" A wary pause. "If you don't mind."
<font color="#814444">“WHAT DID HE CALL ME.” The artist demanded at top of his lungs.
“Well,” Aaron coughed briefly, readjusting his robes a little more than necessary. The wizard was practically a poster child of sullen reluctance. To be fair, Tschichold felt the same way too. “A girl.”
“HOLY SHIT REALLY.”
“Well to be honest.” There was a scholarly (and wizardly) pause. “You do kind of look like one.”
Tschichold was shocked - incredibly so. He could have been more shocked if he exploded in a glory of randomosity or spontaneously gave virginal birth to the Lord and Savior’s Child but it was pretty drastic indeed. Slack-jawed and with palms on his ears, the artist slowly turned towards Freefall. <font color="#7474FF">The Delaunay-esque superheroine simply shrugged. Tschichold decided to interpret that as a “yes.”
“OH MY GOD,” Tschichold shrilled.</font>
“Are you okay,” Aaron asked.
“OH MY GOD.”
“Um.”
“OH. MY. FUCKING GOD.”
“I guess you aren’t.”</font>
“YOU. SHUT UP,” Tschichold snarled. “You have NO IDEA. NO. IDEA.” He placed a lot of stress on the last word. “WHAT I HAVE BEEN THROUGH.”
“Well, from what I see,” Tammy waved his gargantuan palm daintily as though he had to call the sass taxi. ” This would have been pretty hilarious if the robot’s fists were not voltage hazards. “You just had a bad case of freaks like a sissy cuz’ an organic exploded on you.”
“YOU ARE NOT HELPING,” Tschichold snapped.
“Well, you are a little girl.”
“What the—THAT DOES IT.”
For the purpose of petty revenge, Tschichold made the tactically suicidal decision to launch himself onto Tammy. It was a noble endeavor considering the odds were stacked against him, but it was also incredibly stupid considering the robot was about two times the height and size of him. The artist immediately regretted that decision as he soon as he found himself in the vice-grip of the enormous automaton.
“Woah. Woah. Woah.” The robot wagged his finger. “Hold your phone-horses.”
All Tschichold could think of was how incredibly lame the catchphrase was. He would have kicked its stupid face in punishment if his feet were a little closer. “I don’t have any phones.” The artist strained his bottom half in an attempt to do so anyway. “Or horses.”
“That’s a really lame comeback,” Tammy scoffed.
“I’m an artist not a comedian,” Tschichold continue to wriggle like a slippery black fish. “Get your facts rightckt.”
Tschichold found his breath shorter and his movements tighter as the cage of metal fingers tightened around him. The artist glanced downwards and saw the rather smug expression on the robot’s face – or was that the hallucinations again. However, the facts are there: that robot was strangling him. Tschichold would have protested if his lung capacity was larger.
“You better calm down,” the robot taunted. “Otherwise, the next person who’s going to explode is you.”
“No. One,” Tschichold gagged. “Exploded.”
“The evidence’s right there, lady,” Tammy pointed at the wizard vomit on his chest.
Tschichold open and closed his mouth as though he was a fish on dry land. If he did not get out in time, he would turn from Tschichold to Tschichoked-to-death – and a premature elimination was not a fate he wanted to ascribe to.
“Did you do this,” Tammy insisted.
Tschichold’s attention was elsewhere – namely on Freefall. Her expression was grim, her stance was very combat-like, and her skin was very, very dark. Honestly, the skin made an aesthetic contrast with her colorful super-suit, perfect for any art gallery or photo-shoot. However, this did not change the fact that she was very, very prepared to make a junk-heap of the robot.
“Oh no,” Tschichold found the oxygen to make his futile plead against Freefall. “No no no no no no no no—”
“I got lie detectors in my motherboard, pal,” Tammy jeered. “You can’t hide the truth away fro—”</font>
<font color="#7474FF">Tammy was explosively interrupted by the force of nature called Freefall. The aftershock was enough to shatter every fragile thing in the small (and very expensive) bathroom. Aaron flinched as every mirror, glass bulb, and toilet shattered at the same time. On the other hand, the exit was open (considering the entrance was a glass door). Careful not to get any glass snagged onto his robes, the wizard darted away to freedom.</font>
Meanwhile, Tschichold found himself being launched at a very high velocity. This was not exactly the most pleasant sensation - especially since the wall behind him was rapidly getting close at a painful pace. The end would not be pleasant and he was getting pretty angry. After all, this is mostly Little Miss Dense’s fault.
“HEY LADY,” Tschichold yelled to Freefall. “FUCK Y—”
Tschichold never finished that sentence.
---
Wizard robes were not designed for speediness but Aaron managed to get away – at least he rather want to think that way. Despite the countless amount of rooms he passed, the magician was not so sure if he was fully out of danger – especially with that killer electric robot. Aaron had seen what it had done and there was absolutely no way he was willing to let that robo-volt near him. The wizard need to get out fast. He could only escape --
– if he actually knew the directions, of course. In retrospect, he should have picked up a map or asked for directions, but on the other hand, everything in this damned casino was automated. Considering the behavior of Tammy earlier, Aaron was pretty sure that anything with even the thinnest wafer of artificial intelligence would turn him in a magical pancake.
The wizard had never felt this lost since freshman orientation. The bright lights. The multitudes of crowds. A whirlwind of confusion and unfamiliarity. All in all an incredibly unpleasant experience. Aaron’s heart began to pick up pace. He was getting desperate, he needed to run into someone, Someone to depend on. Someone to tell him the answers. Where was Change when he needed him.
Instead, Aaron found something else. The artificial sky was incredibly blue and the weather generators made things pleasant, but the suspiciously man-shaped hole nearby told something else. The tourists and staff were gawking around and in a needlessly spacious pool. A closer inspection revealed a rather spacey lady, a jellyfish…and a familiar looking person.
<font color="#099999">“Oh my gawd!” The lady’s blonde curls bouncing in unison with her excitement. “I think he’s dead!”
“I must be dead,” Tschichold groaned as he floated miserably. “Because I feel like hell.”
Aaron was not quite sure how to react.</font>