Re: The Phenomenal Fracas! (GBS2G6): [Round Three: HMS Thunderhead]
06-19-2011, 03:24 AM
Originally posted on MSPA by MalkyTop.
True to his word, Tamerlane was waiting. It was not exactly very pleasant to have to drag a full-grown woman past some fight he had no business dealing with, nor did it make him happy to find that he would have to take the stairs. He almost thought he would miss his own ten-minute deadline. The thought of that and of Syvex using this to get some sort of pre-fight quip in to get under his skin hastened him, despite the load. (How could one woman be so heavy?)
But he made it. And he waited. Eureka he decided to immediately drop to the floor. She didn’t wake up. Maybe she had a concussion. Did people die from concussions? Well, hopefully, she would have the courtesy not to die before Syvex did.
Tamerlane didn’t need to wait very long. A couple of minutes after he dumped Eureka to the floor, Syvex burst in. He shouted something along the lines of “Where is she?” It was probably instinctive and Tamerlane thought he could probably see her just fine. Still, he couldn’t help but kick her a little towards him. Syvex didn’t quite react as much as he had hoped. Just kept still and gritted his teeth.
Tamerlane shifted his position slightly, the sand around him already whipping up—
“Not here,” Syvex finally said.
--What? Oh. Of course. His girlfriend. How annoying. Though the sand settled down, Tamerlane didn’t straighten. Still staring steadily at the serpent, he replied, “I believe this place is connected to a large dining room. Plenty of room.”
“As long as nobody else is in there.”
“Well. Let’s go check, then.”
The two of them didn’t move, instead, opting to continue their standoff of a vaguely Mexican nature.
Tamerlane, as initiator of the whole fiasco, took it upon himself to break the silence and said, “After you.”
Syvex’s scoff was all he needed to hear. And so instead, he slowly walked backwards. The serpent slithered forward in time to his steps, if it were possible to put a tempo to slithers. The only time Tamerlane even dared to take his eyes off Syvex was to make sure that the double doors were indeed directly behind him. And in this manner, the two of them went by the prone form of Finch, went by the kitchen, and entered the empty dining room.
As soon as Syvex pushed through the doors, he immediately shot a blast that destroyed a line of chandeliers at the same time Tamerlane unleashed a wave of sand that batted Syvex in the side and into a fancy little table. The sandman almost didn’t notice that a portal had appeared above him until a table nearly landed on his skull. He quickly leapt away to avoid it, in front of another portal that Syvex jumped through, forcing the two of them to the floor. As the serpent clawed at him, Tamerlane reached out for something and found his hands clutched around a chair. The chair was then displaced onto Syvex’s head.
And during all this excitement, Eureka woke up. Nobody really witnessed it, though it wasn’t much of an event to witness. Nobody witnessed her get on her feet and examine the kitchen carefully. Nobody witnessed her take two sharp cleavers and exit through the door leading to the hallway. And it was probably a good thing that nobody did.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The pirate attack was already working its way upwards, and though the fat cats tried to flee in their fancy clothes, most of them eventually fell under the blade. Though the females were more likely to be dragged away somewhere private first.
One particularly rotund man was in the middle of watching his whole life flash before his eyes (which he did not appreciate, as once was enough, thank you). He was on the floor, staring up at a sword and certain death. Or rather, a sword and Burton “Certain Death” McGee. He was just at the part when he boarded the zeppelin in the first place when Certain Death got a terribly odd look on his face. The rotund man watched with disgusted interest as blood splurshed onto his fancy suit. The pirate was pushed aside roughly by a rather large cleaver that a rather small woman was holding.
The rotund man’s mind was still flashing back to his entire trip, having not quite caught on to the fact that he was not actually dying at the moment. But his mouth knew what was going on and said, “Oh thank you thank you thank you oh my god.” Some part of him couldn’t help but criticize his savior’s clothing.
The scraggly woman helped him up (not an easy task), and wasted no time in holding a cleaver to his throat.
Oh, there was that ballroom dance that happened just a few days ago. He never actually got to dance. “Oh god, oh god,” the rotund man’s mouth warbled, though with a knife to his throat, it came out rather garbled. “Please don’t kill me oh god oh my god.”
The woman swung her other knife behind him and hooked him closer to her, almost as though she were embracing him. The first knife dug a little into his throat, prompting more gurgled warblings, though notably at a much higher pitch than before. “Oh god, oh god, please, I have a family, please, I’ll do anything, I have a lot of money, please.”
The scraggly woman smiled at him and tilted her head a little. It seemed almost as though she was a house guest that had come to talk over tea. She might have been a good listener, some sort of friend to confide in, if it weren’t for the whole knife-to-the-throat thing. “Oh really?” she said. Her voice was light and interested.
“Yes, yes, I’ll give you anything,” his mouth managed to gurgle out. His mind was still focusing on the time he spent about three hours looking for his key card, only to find it in his other pant pocket.
The woman leaned in even closer. He didn’t think it possible. “Go on,” she whispered, her uncanny smile still playing on her face. “Tell me more. Tell me how much you have.”
“I have rubies! Sapphires! Diamonds! I’m a multibillionaire, I have more money than anybody even needs! Take anything you want! Take my first born! Please, just spare my life! Don’t kill me!”
The woman whispered something else he couldn’t hear. Or perhaps it was a meaningless purr. The two of them stood motionless. “Of course, frieeeend~” she finally said. And then the cleaver dug itself into his jugular and the rotund man found himself on the floor again.
If his mouth could actually feel any frustration, it would have probably felt loads of it at that moment. However, his mind felt very accomplished, having managed to finish reviewing his entire life, without skipping over a single thing. And the scraggly woman moved on to find someone else more interesting than a dying man.
True to his word, Tamerlane was waiting. It was not exactly very pleasant to have to drag a full-grown woman past some fight he had no business dealing with, nor did it make him happy to find that he would have to take the stairs. He almost thought he would miss his own ten-minute deadline. The thought of that and of Syvex using this to get some sort of pre-fight quip in to get under his skin hastened him, despite the load. (How could one woman be so heavy?)
But he made it. And he waited. Eureka he decided to immediately drop to the floor. She didn’t wake up. Maybe she had a concussion. Did people die from concussions? Well, hopefully, she would have the courtesy not to die before Syvex did.
Tamerlane didn’t need to wait very long. A couple of minutes after he dumped Eureka to the floor, Syvex burst in. He shouted something along the lines of “Where is she?” It was probably instinctive and Tamerlane thought he could probably see her just fine. Still, he couldn’t help but kick her a little towards him. Syvex didn’t quite react as much as he had hoped. Just kept still and gritted his teeth.
Tamerlane shifted his position slightly, the sand around him already whipping up—
“Not here,” Syvex finally said.
--What? Oh. Of course. His girlfriend. How annoying. Though the sand settled down, Tamerlane didn’t straighten. Still staring steadily at the serpent, he replied, “I believe this place is connected to a large dining room. Plenty of room.”
“As long as nobody else is in there.”
“Well. Let’s go check, then.”
The two of them didn’t move, instead, opting to continue their standoff of a vaguely Mexican nature.
Tamerlane, as initiator of the whole fiasco, took it upon himself to break the silence and said, “After you.”
Syvex’s scoff was all he needed to hear. And so instead, he slowly walked backwards. The serpent slithered forward in time to his steps, if it were possible to put a tempo to slithers. The only time Tamerlane even dared to take his eyes off Syvex was to make sure that the double doors were indeed directly behind him. And in this manner, the two of them went by the prone form of Finch, went by the kitchen, and entered the empty dining room.
As soon as Syvex pushed through the doors, he immediately shot a blast that destroyed a line of chandeliers at the same time Tamerlane unleashed a wave of sand that batted Syvex in the side and into a fancy little table. The sandman almost didn’t notice that a portal had appeared above him until a table nearly landed on his skull. He quickly leapt away to avoid it, in front of another portal that Syvex jumped through, forcing the two of them to the floor. As the serpent clawed at him, Tamerlane reached out for something and found his hands clutched around a chair. The chair was then displaced onto Syvex’s head.
And during all this excitement, Eureka woke up. Nobody really witnessed it, though it wasn’t much of an event to witness. Nobody witnessed her get on her feet and examine the kitchen carefully. Nobody witnessed her take two sharp cleavers and exit through the door leading to the hallway. And it was probably a good thing that nobody did.
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The pirate attack was already working its way upwards, and though the fat cats tried to flee in their fancy clothes, most of them eventually fell under the blade. Though the females were more likely to be dragged away somewhere private first.
One particularly rotund man was in the middle of watching his whole life flash before his eyes (which he did not appreciate, as once was enough, thank you). He was on the floor, staring up at a sword and certain death. Or rather, a sword and Burton “Certain Death” McGee. He was just at the part when he boarded the zeppelin in the first place when Certain Death got a terribly odd look on his face. The rotund man watched with disgusted interest as blood splurshed onto his fancy suit. The pirate was pushed aside roughly by a rather large cleaver that a rather small woman was holding.
The rotund man’s mind was still flashing back to his entire trip, having not quite caught on to the fact that he was not actually dying at the moment. But his mouth knew what was going on and said, “Oh thank you thank you thank you oh my god.” Some part of him couldn’t help but criticize his savior’s clothing.
The scraggly woman helped him up (not an easy task), and wasted no time in holding a cleaver to his throat.
Oh, there was that ballroom dance that happened just a few days ago. He never actually got to dance. “Oh god, oh god,” the rotund man’s mouth warbled, though with a knife to his throat, it came out rather garbled. “Please don’t kill me oh god oh my god.”
The woman swung her other knife behind him and hooked him closer to her, almost as though she were embracing him. The first knife dug a little into his throat, prompting more gurgled warblings, though notably at a much higher pitch than before. “Oh god, oh god, please, I have a family, please, I’ll do anything, I have a lot of money, please.”
The scraggly woman smiled at him and tilted her head a little. It seemed almost as though she was a house guest that had come to talk over tea. She might have been a good listener, some sort of friend to confide in, if it weren’t for the whole knife-to-the-throat thing. “Oh really?” she said. Her voice was light and interested.
“Yes, yes, I’ll give you anything,” his mouth managed to gurgle out. His mind was still focusing on the time he spent about three hours looking for his key card, only to find it in his other pant pocket.
The woman leaned in even closer. He didn’t think it possible. “Go on,” she whispered, her uncanny smile still playing on her face. “Tell me more. Tell me how much you have.”
“I have rubies! Sapphires! Diamonds! I’m a multibillionaire, I have more money than anybody even needs! Take anything you want! Take my first born! Please, just spare my life! Don’t kill me!”
The woman whispered something else he couldn’t hear. Or perhaps it was a meaningless purr. The two of them stood motionless. “Of course, frieeeend~” she finally said. And then the cleaver dug itself into his jugular and the rotund man found himself on the floor again.
If his mouth could actually feel any frustration, it would have probably felt loads of it at that moment. However, his mind felt very accomplished, having managed to finish reviewing his entire life, without skipping over a single thing. And the scraggly woman moved on to find someone else more interesting than a dying man.