Re: Petty Squabble [ROUND 1] [Fort Ayers, New Atlantis]
06-13-2011, 04:25 AM
Originally posted on MSPA by TimeothyHour.
Waking up to an explosion and a murderous gameshow host isn’t exactly the best way to return to the world.
Additionally, Parsley was never a waking-up person. Despite, or maybe because of, erratic sleep schedules and years of demon-hunting, waking up was one of the harder parts of his day. There had been times the demon hunter had not gone to sleep; afraid he wouldn’t be able to wake up in time of some important event. He had even oftentimes joked about how waking up was his “greatest demon.”
So, it was understandable when Parsley had woken up rather startled and alarmed. Contorting his face with a fearful yell, he grabbed the air behind him, throwing a newly-materialized breadstick at the calmly waiting Six. Parsley’s actions were perfectly understandable, from a human point of view, his surprise completely reasonable.
To Six, however, they were understandable in a different kind of way. Surprise, fear, violence. These were staples of Dice of Death. Six saw them, every day, on his victim’s contorted faces, in their accusing blood. Yes, Parsley’s actions were understandable, unlike Nancy’s cordiality or Smith’s madness. Understandable, understandable and safe.
“GPS DOWN.”
Six’s basic programming kicked in.
“Contestant #3, please stand up. Inability to comply gives me authority to eliminate you, as per protocol.”
Still dazed from his rude awakening, Parsley obeyed the gamehost’s forceful command. The rush of blood helped the demon hunter wake up a bit, and the new levels of lucidity allowed him to consider this particular illusion. A man with a dice for a head. Really, quite clever, yet a little uninspired compared to some of the other things in this massive illusion-
“Thank you, Contestant #3. Questioning will now begin.”
-although he did look quite frightening, covered in blood and chemicals. Parsley doubted that whatever man or beast or illusion represented was malicious towards him, however. Who or whatever it was seemingly did save him, after all. In fact, Parsley should probably mention it to the illusion.
“By the way,” he began. “I want to thank you for-”
“-Please do not speak until questions are asked. Inability to follow formal question-answer protocol is grounds for elimination.”
Parsley quieted himself, even if his saviour seemed rather rude. He continued to privately wonder who this illusion really was, however. Perhaps he could glean some information from aspects of its appearance and actions.
“Question 16: The bark of what common tree was once commonly used as a treatment for aches and fever?”
A medicinal question? Huh. That's honestly a pretty obvious question, so probably whoever this is isn’t real big on medical treatments. Either way, he should probably answer it.
“Willow Bark, sir. If you are a sir, that is.”
“WILLOW. CORRECT. Addendum: for your information, I do go by a masculine pronoun. But please, call me Six, per-protocol.”
Well, at least Parsley knew he was a guy. And judging from the rampant blood on his clothing and that impressive saw as a replacement for his hands, it could be reasonable to conclude that this man was a warrior of some sort. And with all these commands and mention of protocol, whoever this man was had a very strict way of going about things.
Parsley snapped his fingers. He thought he made a connection. Even if he didn’t know who this man was, he knew what he was.
“Contestant #3, please do not snap your fingers. Any further violations of protocol will force me to elimin-”
“Say, are you a knight? Please tell me yes, or I’m going to have to scrap this whole guessing-from-attributes thing.”
Six paused. Not to calculate an answer (one had already been calculated), but because the interruption was legitimately surprising for the robot.
“Like I told another contestant: ‘In many ways I suppose you could compare me to a knight.’ However, Contestant #3, you have broken protocol once again. I regret to inform you that you must be eliminated.”
Six’s blade spun, screaming for the blood that accused. For violence and death and fear.
Waking up to an explosion and a murderous gameshow host isn’t exactly the best way to return to the world.
Additionally, Parsley was never a waking-up person. Despite, or maybe because of, erratic sleep schedules and years of demon-hunting, waking up was one of the harder parts of his day. There had been times the demon hunter had not gone to sleep; afraid he wouldn’t be able to wake up in time of some important event. He had even oftentimes joked about how waking up was his “greatest demon.”
So, it was understandable when Parsley had woken up rather startled and alarmed. Contorting his face with a fearful yell, he grabbed the air behind him, throwing a newly-materialized breadstick at the calmly waiting Six. Parsley’s actions were perfectly understandable, from a human point of view, his surprise completely reasonable.
To Six, however, they were understandable in a different kind of way. Surprise, fear, violence. These were staples of Dice of Death. Six saw them, every day, on his victim’s contorted faces, in their accusing blood. Yes, Parsley’s actions were understandable, unlike Nancy’s cordiality or Smith’s madness. Understandable, understandable and safe.
“GPS DOWN.”
Six’s basic programming kicked in.
“Contestant #3, please stand up. Inability to comply gives me authority to eliminate you, as per protocol.”
Still dazed from his rude awakening, Parsley obeyed the gamehost’s forceful command. The rush of blood helped the demon hunter wake up a bit, and the new levels of lucidity allowed him to consider this particular illusion. A man with a dice for a head. Really, quite clever, yet a little uninspired compared to some of the other things in this massive illusion-
“Thank you, Contestant #3. Questioning will now begin.”
-although he did look quite frightening, covered in blood and chemicals. Parsley doubted that whatever man or beast or illusion represented was malicious towards him, however. Who or whatever it was seemingly did save him, after all. In fact, Parsley should probably mention it to the illusion.
“By the way,” he began. “I want to thank you for-”
“-Please do not speak until questions are asked. Inability to follow formal question-answer protocol is grounds for elimination.”
Parsley quieted himself, even if his saviour seemed rather rude. He continued to privately wonder who this illusion really was, however. Perhaps he could glean some information from aspects of its appearance and actions.
“Question 16: The bark of what common tree was once commonly used as a treatment for aches and fever?”
A medicinal question? Huh. That's honestly a pretty obvious question, so probably whoever this is isn’t real big on medical treatments. Either way, he should probably answer it.
“Willow Bark, sir. If you are a sir, that is.”
“WILLOW. CORRECT. Addendum: for your information, I do go by a masculine pronoun. But please, call me Six, per-protocol.”
Well, at least Parsley knew he was a guy. And judging from the rampant blood on his clothing and that impressive saw as a replacement for his hands, it could be reasonable to conclude that this man was a warrior of some sort. And with all these commands and mention of protocol, whoever this man was had a very strict way of going about things.
Parsley snapped his fingers. He thought he made a connection. Even if he didn’t know who this man was, he knew what he was.
“Contestant #3, please do not snap your fingers. Any further violations of protocol will force me to elimin-”
“Say, are you a knight? Please tell me yes, or I’m going to have to scrap this whole guessing-from-attributes thing.”
Six paused. Not to calculate an answer (one had already been calculated), but because the interruption was legitimately surprising for the robot.
“Like I told another contestant: ‘In many ways I suppose you could compare me to a knight.’ However, Contestant #3, you have broken protocol once again. I regret to inform you that you must be eliminated.”
Six’s blade spun, screaming for the blood that accused. For violence and death and fear.