Re: This Guy's Problem (TWS)
12-04-2011, 08:25 AM
Lady Worpinshire Wrote:>Your far more successful twin brother!
Lady, you talk as if you have the ability to suggest things which can break outside of the mind of our sobbing Solicitor and influence the story proper! (how silly!)
Besides, you know FOR A FACT that you have no twin brother. Your PARENTS made it VERY CLEAR on several occasions that there was NO SUCH SIBLING. They were so adamant about this FACT that they even would BRING IT UP when the conversation did not WARRANT IT, especially on your BIRTHDAY.
Like, "Hey Mom can I invite a smelly peasant kid over?"
"What!? No. YOU DON'T HAVE A TWIN!"
"Uh, yeah mom I know! Duh."
Senor Sasparilla Wrote:Mi hijo, remember the tale I told you of the child and the scorpion. Joo must calm joorself, si? Or else, you will be stung.
You begin to collect yourself.
"Yes. That's right Senor. You always did give some great advice. Gotta stay calm. I can get through this. I am a GOOD LAWYER."
You dry your tears with Dandy Poppins' ample rump and Mr. Fuzzy Hat's headgear. You start to put your puppets back where they belong.
Hobo Jones Wrote:That damn cardboard-box stealing, alcohol-watering-down, mraggle frangle ten days till!
....
You put Hobo Jones back in the bag.
Okay okay, time to psyche yourself back up. You can do this, you can bring out the big guns. You reach around and carefully pick up Professor Newcastle and his intellectual monocle!
You place the puppet on your finger and just start saying whatever words you can in your most proper voice to get yourself going.
Professor Newcastle Wrote:You were ambitious. You wanted a- a finger puppet beyond any other, a finger puppet that would Surpass All Others In Greatness. It would move! It would talk! It would talk more! It would be wise and learned and all that other stuff! It would be miraculous!
Now look at what you've created.
"Yes look at me! Look at what I've created! I am THE BEST! I am..."
"SOLICITOR! YOU WILL BE SILENT!" The LORD glares at you from his JUDGEMENT PERCH.
Looks like the PROSECUTION was giving his closing statement while you were telling yourself how awesome you could make things.
GEEZE you HATE that guy. (The Prosecution, not the LORD. You're TERRIFIED of the LORD. Also THE LORD you guess but that guy isn't nearly as likely to EXECUTE you for LOSING YOUR CASE.)
You sit down on your DEFENSE PLANK next to Scraggly Andy (still toe-pick'n) and listen to what CHARMING MCDICKFACE is saying over there.
And no, that isn't what you call him in your mind. Its just a regular insult. You actually know this douchebag's name.
>_