btp is a teacher now

I HAVE PURCHASED DETERGENT.

Damn all these tiny responsibilities life makes us do/have.

Buy detergent, pay your car insurance, write grand battle posts, dodge questions about when you're going to pay your roommate-landlord, badger HR reps of prospective employers.

Sometimes we don't want to do these things. Sometimes we just want to curl up after a long day of cleaning elderly privates and watch the movie Slither on AMC.

TURNS OUT IT WAS A COOL MOVIE?

I mean it had Nathan Fillion in it and aliens and zombies and a cameo from that girl in the office (Jessica Fisher?) Also inappropriately (very appropriatly) placed country music. Also I only watched the end so that probably made it better.

This is not what I got on here to talk about.

I got on here to talk about how in the hospital there are some patients that have people with them and some that do not have people with them. I like to think that I want to be one that would have people with them.

Let me be racist here (and by racist I mean point out a trend that I have noticed that appears to be correlated with race...so I guess yes, that is racist) I have not yet seen an elderly asian person who is unattended by their families (or a hired caretaker). I am pretty sure this is a cultural thing (wow that sounds so much better than "racist" ..dammit bob stop typing that word) but anyway yes I think it is a good thing. There are too many confused elderly men and women in the hospital who only have a visit from a single concerned family member for like one or two hours a day. Then that person leaves and the disoriented ill person is like "oh where is so-and-so? Will they be here? are they outside?" And I have to say "oh they are home. You are in the hospital. No I can not drive you home. No stay in bed. I am sure they will be here tomorrow (I am not sure)."

It is never a fun time.

Though today I saw something that was sweet. A very sick korean man was taken down for an hour long test, and his wife kept looking out the room for him and pacing around.

She came to me and said, "when will he be back" and I guessed based off what someone had told me (turned out I was wrong and she got worried (moreso) which of course makes you feel bad). Then later she went to me and asked: "do you think he is cold?"

I wanted to hug that lady...also maybe be a little frustrated with her?

There is a crazy mix of compassion/frustration that is really it's own emotion that you get when working in a hospital. It needs it's own name. ... Okay I spent 30 seconds trying to think of a name and got nothing so moving on.

anyway I consoled her and assured her that there would be people there and yes the gel for the ultrasound is a little cold but nothing to worry about. I guess she appreciated it because she gave me a hug later. (see: why I still go to this job). Anyway everything worked out...well except the guy is still sick and in the hospital and starting to get more swollen I think and possibly has C.diff but yeah...little victories.

So yes I have some new and reasonably priced detergent cleaning my clothes now. It is good.

I will probably keep rambling about things but I guess if you read all of this (dear god) then you are free to ask something which will probably guide my ramblings? Like, "have you killed a man?" answer: possibly.

But yes this is a fun way to spend my 3am.