GreyGabe' WebQue t [Texting, Texting, 123]

>The solution is obvious! Create a new thread with spikes in it and take them from there.

…Seems like a lot of work to go to to get some spikes for some armor that you’re probably going to burn and/or eat. Your plate is pretty full to try for another adventure as it is, anyway, and you don’t know how you would implement deadly spikes elsewhere.

> Take the spikes from the pineapple, creating MIGHTY FRUIT ARMOR.

That’s silly, but at least has the added benefit of appealing to your inherent laziness in that you don’t have to go anywhere or do anything to get them. Thankfully, Schazer left behind the spiny outards of the pineapple when she left. You section them off into individual spikes and carefully tape them onto the inside of the armor. You test it out.
It’s uncomfortable, but you think it’s really supposed to be more… excruciating? Yeah, that’s what you’re going for.
Your Worthless Cardboard Armor is now Stupid Uncomfortable Cardboard Armor.

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You have pike in the fridge? …You have Pike in the fridge. You didn’t even know you could get that here. Now, esses, esses, where will you get some esses… Oooooh, inspiration!

Theeeeere we go. You doubt anyone will notice that. Almost certainly. You now have A Pair of Esses. Now, just a little Duct Tape and some good ol’ Eagle Timean ingenuity… There we go!
You now have your very own set of sPikes (unfortunately the only Esses you could find were lower case). The fact that that worked strikes you as being rather… fishy. Oh gog that was painful. You should be… pun-ished. Zing! Oh gaaaah that didn’t feel too good either. You should stop making puns before you really hurt yourself. Okay, a little more Duct Tape, some harsh words, and your Completely Moronic Spiked Cardboard Armor of Excruciating Uselessness is complete. It looks pretty good, if you do say so yourself. Which you don’t, but you know… if.
Of course, now you have no idea what to do with it, but hey.
Oh, and look! MrGuy is gone. He must have wandered off at some point. You hope he wasn’t hurt too badly. Eh, he’ll probably walk it off. Now! What to do with this armor?

Stats:

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GreyGabe
Level 5 Forumite
XP: 42/500
HP: 33/50 (Shaken)
MP: 20/20 (Mystically Delicious)
SP: 16/20 (Mostly Sane)
CP: 40/100 (Kind of Chatty)
Strongliness: Average (1)
Stalwartness: Passable (3)
Swiftness: Decent
Wisdomosity: Average (2)
Charm: Poor (1)
Luck: Average (1)

Internets: 12
Cookies: 4

Status Effects:
Grass Green Hair: Increases affinity with plants.