Boxborg's Webquest [Textastic]

>Ask the old man and the crazy wolf where you can find some candy.

You ask the both of them where you might find some candy. (You’re not sure why you’re bothering… you can’t eat it, as you don’t have a mouth. I guess you’ll burn that bridge when you come to it.)

The wolf shouts, “THE ONLY CANDY YOU NEED IS THE FEAR OF YOUR ENEMIES.”

Okay.

The old man rummages around in a pocket, before holding something out and saying, “It’s dangerous to go alone! Take this!” He gives you some candy!

You get an Ancient Peppermint.

Look for Opposable Digits. You're pretty sure those are important.

You ask about digits next. The old man tucks his hands into his sleeves and shakes his head fervently. The wolf would shrug, if he had any shoulders. Oh well.

>Are you being so sincere right now?

Yes, even though he broke your heart and… wait, no. The dishes are all intact. Guess he didn’t break your heart after all! Still, you’re free now. It’s good to be free.

>Also, attack the Old Man.

Take sword, slay wolf.

Free… to KILL!

You succumb to your primal, murderous urges, and butcher the old man with your Possibly Magical Sword.

“YES! THE STRONG SURVIVE BY VAULTING OVER THE STILL COOLING CORPSES OF THE WEAK!"

You turn your blade on the wolf. Despite your awkward grip, you cut the enthusiastic levitating canine head cleanly in half. His light is extinguished instantly, but the braziers ensure that it is still bright enough to see.

Huh. That got pretty dark, there. You’re not sure why you just brutally murdered your Loyal Enthusiastic Wolfoid Companion or that Helpful but Defenseless Old Man, but oh well, you guess. On the bright side, you found some free digits!

You get a Digits! You're not sure how you're going to attach them though. Oh well, you'll figure it out later.

You decide to leave the cave before your cardboard gets soggy. That red stuff is pretty, but there sure is a lot of it! You’re kind of glad you don’t have any.

You are now outside again. The Hills are still right where you left them, and so is everything else! Should you look around some more, or head somewhere else?