DUNGEONQUEST: THE D20 GAME FOR EVERYONE

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Name: Bernard (Extremely important: pronounced as BerNARD. Well... BERnard is also A-okay, he doesn't really care. The D may be silent, it may not be, Bernard doesn't know, and he really doesn't care either.)
Race: Top Hat
Age: Somewhere between 20 and 40. A while ago, he had his age tattooed somewhere on his body so he wouldn't forget it, but he can't remember where on his body the tattoo was placed. Actually... He didn't forget it, he's just not looking for it. Or maybe he's about 50 years old.

Background/bio/motive/etc:
Bernard was born in France, a happy child with the proudest (and richest) parents of all France, for there wasn't anything wrong with their son. He was healthy, he smiled a lot, and he was a very curious and social baby. On his 1st birthday, Bernard got an enormous birthday chocolate cake, and he waddled his way to it. He had never seen such a huge brown thing with white toppings and such a colorful candle on top, in the shape of a 1. His eyes began to sparkle, and he put his hole hand into the thing, which made Bernard's family members giggle. He brought his hand to his mouth, and as he was licking his fingers, Bernard's mother asked (in French, of course), smiling: "Do you like it?" Uncle Barbara then grabbed the baby with his bionic arm and threw it at the door. The cake was now a pizza, and Bernard said: "I love pizza." As of then, no one succeeded to communicate with Bernard, because he didn't care. At all. About anything. I mean, although he lived in France, and everyone he knew spoke French, Bernard spoke only British, because his imaginary friend was from England and he couldn't care less about the French language, or his French family, or anything French at all, or anything English, German, mormon, morbid, mortal or even about the frustration he didn't get from sentences that are way too long and don't even have an . The rest of Bernard's story is just doing random stuff and eating pizzas. Bernard loves pizzas.

personality: Chaotic Neutral. Bernard just doesn't give a shit about anything, so yeah. He does whatever he feels like, whether it's the most logical choice or not.
height: Short (But average for a top hat)
Weight: Light (Average top hat)

Stats:

Luck: 14 "It would be really cool if I had a glass statue of myself... Hey, over there!"
Intelligence: 2 "I think I should kick it."
Endurance: 10 "Well, at least it didn't not break."
Vitality: 20 "Pfft, lost a foot? Who cares? Oh look, there's a -oh, it flew away. care."
Dexterity: 8
Knowledge: 3
Speech: 3 "I love pizzas. Wait, do I? Meh. or... Oh well, maybe. care. How do you feel about this, random stranger?" "I think you should see a therapist." "I am a top hat." "Oh... Yeah..." "I am a top hat." "Stop that." "No, without the 's' and 't'." "I think I just litterally became 35% stupider because of you."


Class: Freelance Don'tcaretaker.

"Freelance" actually serves no purpose here, because all don'tcaretakers are freelancers. It doesn't really matter, some people just like the word "Freelance". Anyway, don'tcaretakers not only don't care, they also gain power when there is more stuff not to care about. The more happiness, trash, dead bodies, enemies, etc, the less don'tcaretakers care, which obviously makes them more powerful when they do random things.

Traits:
yyyyeNO: When asked for a favor, Bernard will not help out and care even less. Instead, the person asking may do it theirselves harder/better/faster/stronger out of frustration.
Pizzalover: Everything is better when pizza is involved. Bernard may even care for a while and help his teammates.
Just a Fleshwound: Whenever one of Bernard's limbs is removed from his body, he can still use it, because he doesn't care that it's been removed and he just wants to use it.

Special:
Yawn Bomb: Well... It's not really a bomb. Maybe I shouldn't call it a bomb, then? Meh... care. Anyway, when Bernard yawns out of boredom, he may give his yawn a little boost, in order to make EVERYONE yawn like him, causing them to give 0 fucks about anything for a turn. That'll teach uncle Barbara. (Cooldown ? turns)