"Seriously brain, what the hell?" A Thread For Weird Dreams and Nightmares

I'd like to figure out how to lucid dream, but first I have to have dreams that aren't complete blackness. I'm sure I am dreaming, but I can literally remember none of it but just a big black space. I've never bothered to try to lucid dream though, and I never have any control over my dreams.

I do remember a few of my dreams (one of the ones that would fit this thread had a girl rub her tits on my face, no idea what the fuck was going on there) but pretty few.