Re: One-Man Infiltration Mission
09-24-2011, 02:18 AM
Hothead laughed.
"Ha ha ha ha," is how it went. He swiveled in his desk chair, the chair was separate from the desk, but he had a desk to swivel into. His chair was high-topped and would have easily hid him behind it for a dramatic reveal, had his skull not been 13 feet tall. Sadly, IKEA does not make specialty chairs. Hothead threw his Allen Wrench at the floor, where it melted into molten malt. Hothead stood up.
"Soon everybody in Antartica shall be feeling a little... hot under the collar," Hothead said, popping his collar and then falling over because his head is 13 feet tall. "And it's all thanks to you, darling."
Hothead stroked his giant on-off switch that he had installed into the wall. It turned his machine on or off, depending on which way it was flipped.
"Anita!" he shouted. He didn't know any Anitas, but he figured if there were any spies named Anita in the vicinity it might confuse them out of hiding.
"Carol!" he caroled. He did know a Carol.
"Yes boss?" said Carol, the secretary, entering in her modest librarian outfit she always wore. Her hair was tied into her glasses, but she never wore them. She just thought it made her look smarter, even when she messed up and tied them in upside-down.
"Carol! Why aren't you dressed more skankaliciousily?!" said Hothead. Carol immediately tore off her modest librarian-style outfit off, revealing a skin-tight catsuit underneath. She was wearing a bikini over the bodysuit. "That's better," said Hothead. "Now go outside and give that pilot some warm hot cocoa. He looks distraught." Hothead knew how the pilot looked because he had decided to take a more accessible and open method in designing his impenetrable fortress, to boost employee morale. The front door led directly into his office, where he would glower at his employees, like they had personally failed him and by extension their father. (He made sure to only hire employees who had fathers with 13-foot heads. Some called it discrimination, but Hothead called it I'm in Antarctica, where no laws apply.) There was as many windows as there were rooms with walls, Some rooms didn't even have walls! The impenetrable fortress was a triumph of design.
"Ha ha ha ha," is how it went. He swiveled in his desk chair, the chair was separate from the desk, but he had a desk to swivel into. His chair was high-topped and would have easily hid him behind it for a dramatic reveal, had his skull not been 13 feet tall. Sadly, IKEA does not make specialty chairs. Hothead threw his Allen Wrench at the floor, where it melted into molten malt. Hothead stood up.
"Soon everybody in Antartica shall be feeling a little... hot under the collar," Hothead said, popping his collar and then falling over because his head is 13 feet tall. "And it's all thanks to you, darling."
Hothead stroked his giant on-off switch that he had installed into the wall. It turned his machine on or off, depending on which way it was flipped.
"Anita!" he shouted. He didn't know any Anitas, but he figured if there were any spies named Anita in the vicinity it might confuse them out of hiding.
"Carol!" he caroled. He did know a Carol.
"Yes boss?" said Carol, the secretary, entering in her modest librarian outfit she always wore. Her hair was tied into her glasses, but she never wore them. She just thought it made her look smarter, even when she messed up and tied them in upside-down.
"Carol! Why aren't you dressed more skankaliciousily?!" said Hothead. Carol immediately tore off her modest librarian-style outfit off, revealing a skin-tight catsuit underneath. She was wearing a bikini over the bodysuit. "That's better," said Hothead. "Now go outside and give that pilot some warm hot cocoa. He looks distraught." Hothead knew how the pilot looked because he had decided to take a more accessible and open method in designing his impenetrable fortress, to boost employee morale. The front door led directly into his office, where he would glower at his employees, like they had personally failed him and by extension their father. (He made sure to only hire employees who had fathers with 13-foot heads. Some called it discrimination, but Hothead called it I'm in Antarctica, where no laws apply.) There was as many windows as there were rooms with walls, Some rooms didn't even have walls! The impenetrable fortress was a triumph of design.