This is gonna be the thread where we talk about stuff

I should probably post this somewhere. I've been drifting away from Eagle Time ever since the majority of forum activity moved to discord. We're definitely less of a forum and more of a community now. I love that. I love how tight-knit and accepting and queer Eagle Time is. That this and Discondor can be a safe-space for teens still figuring themselves out or searching for somewhere to be themselves safely and comfortably is wonderful. This is, without a doubt, the most wholesome place I've ever been on on the internet. I'm glad I found it when I did, when I needed a place to joke and talk with a better set of norms and a kinder set of people.

But more and more, I've realized that this is no longer my place. I've said my jokes, hosted my games, learned my lessons. I have found friends and peers who saw me, and through mutual respect and humour and positive ideology, helped me be a better and more informed person. I was invested in each poster, developing pictures in my mind of the people they are. I could read every thread and every post, and did (almost, there are a lot of adventures). 

That was, in a way, my fatal flaw. A key difference between forums and ircs is the pace. Forums are slow, a post at a time. It is easy to simply leave and come back--no one will notice. Backlogs can be slowly managed with marked progress. Another difference, which is harder to describe, is personal access. Live chats demand a high personal access, needing to stay up-to-date and reply quickly if mentioned. The turn-over time for topics is high, as an hour after something is mentioned it has been buried.

At first, I tried to keep up. There are several people who if they say something I want to listen. But the backlogs became tremendous as activity increased. I tried to keep up with everyone because I was invested in their lives and feelings. Every once and a while, I wouldn't read any of the day's messages. I would just mark all as read, and keep up with the current stuff. I did this more and more, and I felt both guilty and relieved. I realized that trying to keep up, to stay current, was stressing me out to the point of sickness. So I stopped.

I can't be invested in 100+ active people anymore. I just don't have the energy. I can barely manage the 50ish offline people I care about. I'm so tired all the time.

Thank you to a52 and Credit, Schazer and Palamedes, Mirdini and  and Whimbrel and Kaynato and goblin's. There's so many of you, too many to list off. I'm sure you know who you are. I do.

Thank you, everyone, for being so excellent. Goodbye.