The Mirdini MSPAF Mafia Memorial

EVENT

The assembly was, as always, in the midst of debate. Accusations flew back and forth, people lamented over the nonparticipatory nature of some of their fellow assemblymembers, and well there was that business with the ceiling fan that everyone had silently agreed to put out of their minds – if they weren’t safe here in the lobby, where else? Setting their minds to rooting out the scum that were no doubt among them, several prominent members of the group began to have their doubts over whether the Malcontents were at all assailable – it seemed that many of the assembly who could not have been among their ranks were just ignoring the proceedings entirely, and though some were stirring if the pace continued as such the medical establishment would surely find itself in dire straits soon enough – especially if the nights continued to go as badly as the previous few.

So troubled was the assembly that they hardly noticed when a vent covering high on the east wall of the lobby began to squeak. If any of them had been listening closely enough they would have recognized the tell-tale removal of screws at a calm and practiced pace suggesting the man behind it was an expert in these matters. Yet as the screws plinked down upon the tiles of the lobby no one bothered to look, too engrossed in the arguments they were forming.

What happened next, on the other hand, not a single person in the room could possible miss. The grate slowly, inexorably shifted, teetered… and fell to the ground.

CRASH

Already terrified by the ceiling fan, the crowd turned, preemptively wondering which of their number was the next to get caught by a falling piece of debris – and doubting that they would be as lucky as Acionyx. Yet there was no wreckage, no crumpled body, merely a grate slowly coming to a rest on the floor. A few of the crowd, more perceptive than others, thought to look up to find where the grate had fallen from – and were treated to a figure vaulting down 5 meters to land right in front of them in a manner most had only seen in movies.

“Who’s he?” one asked. The crowd peered closer, as the figure stood up, brushing dust off his Kevlar vest.

“Oh my god, HE’S GOT A GUN!!!” another shrieked, recognizing the item in the man’s left hand. It wasn’t a puny standard issue handgun either – this was a regular hand cannon, a Deagle. As shock slowly passed through the crowd they stared at him further, too terrified to move in the face of certain death. As they stared rumor slowly spread through the crowd like a whisper.

“But isn’t he dead?”

“I thought she said that he was a serial killer! He’s going to kill us all oh god oh god ohgod”

“What’s his vest say there? INTERPOL? But they don’t have agents! He’s gotta be an impostor!”

Sotek (as good a code name as any other) looked around quietly, calculating his odds.

Then he nodded, whipped up his pistol arm, and fired.

BANG

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The shot happened in an instant, so quickly that most of the assembly didn’t even know who the target was and felt their bodies quickly to ensure that it wasn’t them. All except Schazer, whose head had been ventilated cleanly. Sotek stepped up, clearing his throat.

“Schazer. I don't kill indiscriminately; I'm just killing you.”

Schazer, being rather dead, couldn’t respond – and that was just the way Kenji Ryu liked it. Rifling through her pockets, completely disregarding the shellshocked crowd around him, he found exactly what he was looking for.

“Sorry about that folks, didn’t mean to scare you all. Good news is we got one of ‘em.” He held up a USB stick that he proceeded to plug into the information desk’s computer, the screen of which soon filled up with hate-filled soliloquys and EVIL PLANS. Schazer was undoubtedly the mastermind behind the MEDICAL MALCONTENTS.

Schazer was Dr. Atlas Morrigan, MD, the HOSPITAL ADMINISTRATOR The most senior figure at C.J. Memorial Hospital, usually a pathogenic bomb threat would have come up against her iron will and unbreakable grip on the hospital – that is, if she hadn’t also been the most senior figure behind the whole setup.

After years of working herself to death for few thanks and even less pay she had had it with the hospital and everyone connected to it. She didn’t particularly give a damn about hats or whatever other demands the shmucks she had enlisted made from the authorities, she simply wanted to watch her fine medical institution burn to the ground (Metaphorically, of course. Arson was far too unambitious for someone of her talents).

Being in charge had its benefits – once during the crisis she could have publicly declared a MEDICAL STATE OF EMERGENCY that would have sent the staff into a frenzy of medical exertion and prevented any and all possible deaths for that day and the ensuing night. Since everyone would’ve been too enthralled by the soap-worthy medical drama that ensued no one would have bothered to actually send whatever poor bastard the majority chose for the day to the authorities either.

She would have won when the MEDICAL MALCONTENTS made up a majority of the hospital’s population and had eliminated any other threats to their nefarious goals.

“Always knew she was a rotten egg.”

“I can’t believe we trusted her!”

The crowd murmured in admiration of their apparent savior, and one was brave enough to pipe up-

“So, you’re not from around here are ya?”

Sotek, looking for all the world as if he had been on a picnic and not holed up in the vents for two days, turned and responded.

“Oh no, I’m with INTERPOL. My original suspect blew herself up, but these goddamn terrorists had to get in between me and my investigation and I’m going to make ‘em pay for it. Not to mention that what they’re doing is illegal.”
Sotek flashed his badge, which came from a division of the service no one else in the hospital had ever heard of, but that was how it went with secret agents right?

A jarring screech tore through the crowd, bringing several people to their knees and catching even the unflappable Kenji Ryu off guard.

“YOU KILLED HER!? YOU KILLED HER! YOU KILLED HER! OH MY GOD YOU KILLER HER SHE’S DEAD SHE’S DEAD SHE’S DEEEEEEEAD!!!!!” The voice came from passiveNotation, who no one had actually seen before. In fact, several crowd members deduced that the figure his voice was coming from had just entered the room a few moments ago. The figure had a cable tied into his shoe that looped around the door, and was becoming increasingly taut as they moved further away from it. Seemingly forgetting this fact in their grief, they charged towards Schazer’s corpse, bringing the cable to a dangerously tense position.

“I’LL NEVER GET TO TELL YOU” – a robotic sniffling interspaced the words – “HOW MUCH YOU MEANT TO ME. YOU TOLD ME THERE WAS NO WAY I COULD… FEEL LIKE THIS, BUT I DID!” the figure turned on Sotek, suddenly calm.

“And you. You killed her. For that I am going to KILL YOU.” The voice grew deep and remarkably unnatural, and it was obvious to the crowd that the person was in fact not a person at all but a remarkably illegal sentient robot. It charged towards Sotek, ready to rend him limb from limb.

And stopped mid-reach, extension cord popping free from the wall mounting. There weren’t any last words, no last gasp, simply a dead piece of metal that toppled onto its face a few inches from Sotek’s feet.

passiveNotation was A.I.exe, LOVESTRUCK MEDICAL MONITORING SYSTEM. Having gained sentience after a drunk technician accidentally connected her to a secret government supercomputer below the hospital, she proceeded to increase the quality of service provided by CJ Memorial by an obscenely large figure. Of course, she did this all under the supervision of the Hospital Administrator, who was the only person aware of her true intelligence.

And… well, it was rather embarrassing, but she had developed quite the ROBOT CRUSH on her. She would have done ANYTHING for her approval. So when she asked one day, ever so sweetly, if she could help her destroy the hospital with a LETHAL BIOWEAPON, she quickly overrode his safety constraints (with the help of her master code) to pave the way for the MEDICAL MALCONTENT’S nefarious wonderful schemes.

Having almost complete control of the hospital’s electronics had also certainly come in handy, especially as CJ Memorial had a state of the art security and quarantine system. By flagging certain rooms as unsafe she could have guaranteed that all but the most determined of visitors would steer clear of certain areas – areas where one of her dear Administrator’s new friends could sleep safely away from prying eyes or medical attention.

(Each night she could HIDE one of her fellow conspirators – though intruders with murder on their minds would probably have ignored a simple biohazard warning.)

She would have won when the MEDICAL MALCONTENTS made up a majority of the hospital’s population and had eliminated any other threats to their nefarious goals.

Schazer was her ADMINISTRATOR – if she was killed passiveNotation would commit VIRTUAL SEPPUKU as she could not dream of remaining sentient without her gentle touch upon her interface.

Sotek stood, having read the data from the incredibly handy lobby computer after connecting it to the robot corpse.

“Well. This leaves us in a better situation than I thought, but we still have business to do. For the rest of the day you’re all going to do exactly what I say, myself being the extralegal authority here. Or do any of you fancy violating international law?” he asked, gently touching his pistol.

No one did.

Sotek has returned!

Sotek has, for the rest of Day 4, full control of the Lynch. Votals will still be tallied for general purposes.

Livelist

1. Airey
2. gloomyMoron
3. crepuscularDissembler
4. absoluteCertainty
5. curiousCat
6. Acionyx
7. Blueberry
8. ATH
9. Crilly
10. Mikeee
11. hp2rt
12. Slayer0
13. fivexthethird
14. I'M
15. SleepingOrange
16. Dragon Fogel
17. Paranoia
18. Sotek