RE: You Wake Up In A Bar
05-03-2018, 01:10 AM
(This post was last modified: 05-03-2018, 01:12 AM by Arcanuse.)
Alright, that's enough. Time to talk to the clown for a minute.
Look. Honkit.
We've been more than patient with you, but this has got to stop.
You can stay here, but you have to use your indoor voice.
The quiet, less eardrum rupturing voice.
Hey, we'll even let that be your payment.
Just please, please be a bit quieter.
If you can't than please leave, and come back when you can.
...
Alright, since that's probably going to fail, here's plan B.
If they do leave, smack shaker on a nearby surface until rumbling ceases, to render the contents (mostly) inert. Use Eraser to vaporize the remainder.
Otherwise, request guests take their drinks, move away from the Honkit, close their eyes and think happy thoughts.
Aim shaker at Honkit. Inform Stax to find some cover.
Release the beverage.
Hope we never, ever have to do something like this again.
Look. Honkit.
We've been more than patient with you, but this has got to stop.
You can stay here, but you have to use your indoor voice.
The quiet, less eardrum rupturing voice.
Hey, we'll even let that be your payment.
Just please, please be a bit quieter.
If you can't than please leave, and come back when you can.
...
Alright, since that's probably going to fail, here's plan B.
"Eviction Special" Wrote:1 Bottle of liquid Kings BreathPolitely, yet firmly ask the honkit to leave again.
(Yes, the entire bottle. Stuff turns to gas real fast.)
2 Eldritch whispers, fresh off the vine
1 Mimeo laugh, handle this very carefully
3 thundercubes
1 slab of Croakan murmurs
1 quart Anemoi blood
Shake vigorously until shaker rumbles with the force (and sounds) of a terrible storm. Horrific wailing is normal, can be shushed by smacking the shaker on a nearby surface.
If they do leave, smack shaker on a nearby surface until rumbling ceases, to render the contents (mostly) inert. Use Eraser to vaporize the remainder.
Otherwise, request guests take their drinks, move away from the Honkit, close their eyes and think happy thoughts.
Aim shaker at Honkit. Inform Stax to find some cover.
Release the beverage.
Hope we never, ever have to do something like this again.
Quiet. Good for an unusual opinion. Doesn't talk much.