Consistency

Forrest: meet the Secret Agent.

You decide that it's time to take this secret public. You're going to pay a visit to the Secret Agent to figure out the best way to do that.

"Well, Mr. Forrest, this is a juicy secret you have here," the agent says. "I'm thinking I could get you a book deal at least, maybe even a movie or two. But I don't work for free, y'know. It's a rough business, if I guess wrong I could lose a lot of money. So I need a little guarantee that it'll be worth my time even if the secret doesn't pan out."

Dang it, you knew this would be a problem. The agent's fee is pretty ridiculous. How are you going to get that kind of money, Forrest?

Fail to see the Forrest for the Theresa.

Okay, you've made up your mind. You're not going to bother watching Forrest Gump, you're going to watch the documentary on Mother Theresa instead.

But this line is ridiculously long. At this rate, the movie will be half over by the time you get your tickets. Isn't there anything you can do to speed this up?

fresh up

Fresh Up! Yes, that's what you'll call your sensational new soda! With a name like that, it's bound to get top sales!

Within a week, you're an amazing success. You've made millions! But now you have a new problem - what are you going to do with all this money?

fresh down

You decide that you'll sell fresh down. You grab a chicken, a duck, a goose, and a turkey and drag them to the market. You write a sign saying you'll pluck them right there for the customer, there's no down fresher than yours!

But business is slow. Maybe you need a better sales pitch. Or some kind of publicity stunt.

So what's your plan?

a la carte

Vous vous tenez sur le menu. Vous avez une meilleure vue de ce restaurant. Mais vous ne pouvez toujours pas voir le rayon rétrécissant du tout! Comment aurait-il pu tout simplement disparu?

Sur le plan positif, le serveur semble avoir enfin vous avez remarqué. Il vous demande si vous êtes prêt à l'ordre. Que lui direz-vous?

> man, you should call it Quits.

It's settled. Your new support group for people who successfully got over their addictions and now regret it will be Quits! It's catchy, you like it.

The next step is to get the word out somehow. And that's going to be tricky. Where exactly are you going to find recovered alcoholics or smokers feeling down about themselves? You've got to start somewhere, after all.

>talk POPE about EXILE

You address the Prime Organizational Programmer-Empress and begin explaining the new Explanatory Xylophone Instructional Lecture Exercises. Naturally, you do this on your recently-installed xylophone attachment.

And this is when you discover a significant flaw. Without hearing the Explanatory Xylophone Instructional Lecture Exercises, the Prime Organizational Programmer-Empress doesn't know how to interpret your xylophone playing! She just stares at you blankly.

This is a severe problem. Your funding is in jeopardy. How can you resolve this crisis?