RE: SeaWyrm's Talon Exercises
11-14-2012, 08:37 PM
I unplugged everything but the subwoofer. The ultimate bass experience awaited.
I lifted my hand, ready to strum.
"Stop!" cried a voice from the other end of the tiny auditorium.
I squinted, but my vision was blurry without my glasses on - and who rocks while wearing glasses? Whoever it was was trying to run down the aisle towards me, but the person's progress was impeded by its narrowness. He kept having to stop so he could squeeze past a pair of seats.
I waited patiently, brushing a strand of long and greasy dark hair out of my face. I realized I wasn't entirely sure where I'd left my glasses. Were they in the dressing room?
The figure scrambled wildly up onto the stage and yanked the cord out of my guitar.
"Thank goodness!" he said, "I was almost too late!"
I still couldn't make out this guy's face, even though he was right in front of me. I scowled at him anyway. "The heck was that for?" I asked.
"That thing's horribly tuned, and the pickup is all wrong," he said. "If you'd gone through with it, it would've sounded awful." He paused for a moment. "Also, it's rigged to set off the bomb," he added as an afterthought.
"Whaa? Bomb?"
"Yes, you know, one of those things that goes 'foom!' and then there's fire and all plasma-y bits everywhere. Shrapnel. That sort of thing. Can be a bit dangerous."
I set the bass down gently. "What on earth are you talking about?" I asked.
"That's just it, we aren't on Earth! This whole auditorium is an illusion, and poorly designed on top of that."
"Really?"
"Yeah, all the sound would get muffled. It would be loud, but see how the ceiling is shaped? All the nuance would-"
"No, what do you mean we aren't on Earth?"
"Oh, that! Well, as it happens, you're an artificial construct designed to activate the signal to detonate a ginormous bomb that will destroy this whole city and possibly the asteroid it sits on."
"What- what did you call me?" I boggled at the man.
"You aren't real, buddy. Well, no, that's not fair. You obviously exist. Maybe you're even capable of sapient thought, I dunno. I'm willing to give you the benefit of the doubt. But you're also a computer program trapped in a computer program. None of this is real!"
---15 Mins---
I lifted my hand, ready to strum.
"Stop!" cried a voice from the other end of the tiny auditorium.
I squinted, but my vision was blurry without my glasses on - and who rocks while wearing glasses? Whoever it was was trying to run down the aisle towards me, but the person's progress was impeded by its narrowness. He kept having to stop so he could squeeze past a pair of seats.
I waited patiently, brushing a strand of long and greasy dark hair out of my face. I realized I wasn't entirely sure where I'd left my glasses. Were they in the dressing room?
The figure scrambled wildly up onto the stage and yanked the cord out of my guitar.
"Thank goodness!" he said, "I was almost too late!"
I still couldn't make out this guy's face, even though he was right in front of me. I scowled at him anyway. "The heck was that for?" I asked.
"That thing's horribly tuned, and the pickup is all wrong," he said. "If you'd gone through with it, it would've sounded awful." He paused for a moment. "Also, it's rigged to set off the bomb," he added as an afterthought.
"Whaa? Bomb?"
"Yes, you know, one of those things that goes 'foom!' and then there's fire and all plasma-y bits everywhere. Shrapnel. That sort of thing. Can be a bit dangerous."
I set the bass down gently. "What on earth are you talking about?" I asked.
"That's just it, we aren't on Earth! This whole auditorium is an illusion, and poorly designed on top of that."
"Really?"
"Yeah, all the sound would get muffled. It would be loud, but see how the ceiling is shaped? All the nuance would-"
"No, what do you mean we aren't on Earth?"
"Oh, that! Well, as it happens, you're an artificial construct designed to activate the signal to detonate a ginormous bomb that will destroy this whole city and possibly the asteroid it sits on."
"What- what did you call me?" I boggled at the man.
"You aren't real, buddy. Well, no, that's not fair. You obviously exist. Maybe you're even capable of sapient thought, I dunno. I'm willing to give you the benefit of the doubt. But you're also a computer program trapped in a computer program. None of this is real!"
---15 Mins---