Post making contest 6.0

Ceci n'est pas une thread.

Passes rule 1

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Spoiler2h √3 #1 #1

Passes rule 1, and still not 2 (since rule 2 hasn't been passed in the interim)

prune the main thread

Passes none of the rules

Dang it, I hate the world without umbrellas! I keep getting wet.

Passes none of the rules

NECROMANCY

Passes both rules 1 and 2! Good work.

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At this current state, Rules 2 and 5 are not simultaneously satisfiable. (Although I suspect rules 3, 4, and 5 are all very difficult to attain at the current point.)