Post making contest 5.0

This is episode #3.

• the episode doesn't start for a minute because they're too busy talking about Hitler
  
• People confirmed for rushing GL: Sjin, Rythian, Ben
  
• Duncan: "What's some really kind of semi-racist Native American names that I can use?" DUNCAN NO
  
• ONEDOGHEPOOP
  
• Lewis is building Stonehenge, so he opened Piety. Huh.
  
• AND OF COURSE BECAUSE BEN AND LEWIS WERE INCAPABLE OF TALKING THEIR LAND SPLIT THROUGH THEY'RE ALREADY HAVING AN ARGUMENT ABOUT IT
  
• Lewis: "How is this desert fair?" Ben: "I didn't put the desert there!"
  
• can somebody please say Rythian's pantheon out loud he's panicking about it out loud I wanna know what he did
  
• SJIN ADOPTED GOD OF THE SEA THANK FUCKING GOODNESS
  
• also his second city is not coastal because he apparently really valued El Dorado for some reason
  
• he has also forgotten to build the Great Library like I thought he was going for did he just think he desperately needed writing that early was that it
  
• Duncan: "I'm changing my naming scheme" phew
  
• COMBUMBO
  
• Rythian got the GL, which was fairly predictable. What was not predictable was that he opened Liberty oh man
  
• see wide play is arguably better in NQMod on NQMap than tall play and Rythian is arguably one of the better players (i.e. capable of pulling it off) but he's also a natural fucking turtle
  
• "No, Cobumbo is behind Ikea Land and Meatball World" "I can see Bacon, who's that?" aw bless
  
• Rythian, on Ben's naming scheme for Sweden: "I don't know if I should be offended; it's kind of correct, I suppose"
  
• Duncan: "I'm a big fan of Stockholm Syndrome" Ben: "He didn't used to be, he used to hate it, but - it grew on him"
  
• they're now trying to persuade Pyrion to spend the whole series talking in his Local Football Commentator voice
  
• BEN PICK GODDESS OF PROTECTION DO IT DOOOOOO IIIIIIT
  
• Rythian: "I was going to get the (pantheon) for camps, but I couldn't find it" IT'S ALWAYS BEEN GODDESS OF THE HUNT THE NAME HASN'T CHANGED JUST THE BONUS IT'S PLUS ONE FOOD AND FAITH NOW IT WOULD HAVE BEEN GREAT
  
• Rythian: "and so I got like the 'build ancient wonders faster' one" AAAAAAAAAAAHHHHHH
  
• Sjin lost his scout to barbarians and is now retreating his fatally wounded archer... towards the barbarians. Sjin no.
  
• Rythian: "I beat Sjin and Sjin beat (Lewis), so through transitive properties I'm the best... except I've lost to I think everyone here, soooooo"
  
• oh yeah Sjin is going to have fun with the AI pathfinding this game because of Carthage's ability to move over mountains he's just lost a warrior due to the game thinking the shortest path was the one that suicides the unit
  
• strictly speaking I guess that is the shortest path insofar as it's the one that kills the unit quickest
  
• everyone's complaining about how small the map is and yet I can't help but think it's pretty big
  
• I think the problem is that people just don't know how to explore
  
• we've just had a solid minute of Rythian mousing over his list of researchable techs whilst Pyrion waxes lyrical about Sharpe
  
• also Rythian's one city liberty is going fine I'm sure
  
• (please let him be building his NC please let him be building his NC he took Philosophy as his free tech)
  
• NO HE'S BUILDING A SETTLER FUCKING HELL
  
• Rythian: "Have you ever been a kid, Pyrion?" Pyrion: "Nope, I was just born a very angry boy"
  
• THEY SWITCHED THE CAMERA VIEW BEFORE YOU SAW WHAT LEWIS PICKED FOR HIS RELIGIOUS BELIEFS DAMN THEM
  
• WHY IS DUNCAN SURPRISED THAT THE GUY WHO BUILT STONEHENGE GOT AN EARLY RELIGION
  

tl;dr - everyone forgets that there is no such thing as a religious victory

End of message.