Post making contest 3.0

"...is that X-schlong, mark 1001? That is freshwater. It's not too greedy going for this, I need the culture... all right, cheaper amphitheatres. Eight turns on the engineer. Hmph."

*vague static, punctuated by distorted water droplet noises and analog clicks*

Passes 4 and 5

i hate blight town i hate blight town i hate blight town

Passes 1 and 4.

Million dollars but,

Whenever you use the computer, gum from a random person teleports from their mouth into yours.

Passes 4.

我求你听我的话，要是你做，我付你一百万美元：

吃茄子会把肚子烂透啊~

Passes 3 and I'm pretty sure it doesn't pass 5 but i have to trust google on that one.