Post making contest 3.0

.. .----. -- / .... .- ...- .. -. --. / ... --- / -- ..- -.-. .... / ..-. ..- -. / .--- ..- ... - / .--. --- ... - .. -. --. / -.-- --- ..- - ..- -... . / ...- .. -.. . --- ...

G0od pun.

... ..- .-. . / .. ... --..-- / -... . -.-. .- ..- ... . / .. - / ..- ... . -.. / --. --- --- -.. / .-- --- .-. -.. .--. .-.. .- -.-- .-.-.-

.. - / .. ... / .- / ... . -.-. .-. . - / - --- / . ...- . .-. -.-- --- -. . .-.-.-

..-. .. ... .... -....- ... .... .- .--. . -.. / ..-. .. ... .... / - .- ... - . / .-.. .. -.- . / ..-. .. ... .... --..-- / -.-. . .-. - .- .. -. .-.. -.-- --..-- / .- ... / --- -. .-.. -.-- / ..-. .. ... .... -....- ... .... .- .--. . -.. / ..-. .. ... .... / -.. --- --..-- / .- ... / --- .--. .--. --- ... . -.. / - --- / .-- .- - . .-. -- . .-.. --- -. -....- ... .... .- .--. . -.. / .-- .- - . .-. -- . .-.. --- -. ... / .-- .... .. -.-. .... / -.. --- / -. --- - / - .- ... - . / .-.. .. -.- . / ..-. .. ... .... --..-- / .-.. .. -.- . / ..-. .. ... .... -....- ... .... .- .--. . -.. / ..-. .. ... .... / - .- ... - . / .-.. .. -.- . / ..-. .. ... .... .-.-.-

This post passes rules 1, 2, 3, 4, and 5!

Congratulations!

RULES ARE THUS:

Rule 1: "Secret" - Post must contain a secret or be a secret.
Rule 2: "Graph" - Post must have more dots than lines. Judged via script.
Rule 3: "Euphonic" - Post must have words that begin with consecutive musical notes (A through G) that form a major triad.
Rule 4: "Yes" - Post must agree with at least one statement in the previous post and provide a reason regardless of veracity.
Rule 5: "Hell" - Post must describe a hell. A hell must have a punishment and a condition of entry.

The passing post had "BURNING TO DEATH (a lot)" as the punishment and "NOT BEING MINE" as the condition of entry for the hell.

EDIT: Script stuff:

Sometimes I needed to manually judge (with rule 3 or weird text symbols for rule 2) - images and videos didn't count unless incredibly obviously just dots and/or dashes / lines.

Script:

Code:

var DAHS = [
    "bdefhimnpqrtuBDIP2!%-_|\/\\",
    "vxGLRTVX157$^=+<>",
    "kzAFHKNYZ4[]",
    "wEMW#"
];

var DITS = [
    ".!?ij;",
    ":"
]

function sanitize(str) {
    return str.replace(/&nbsp;|<\/span>\w+ Wrote: |<[^<>]*>|\(Today \d+:\d+ [AP]M\)|<[^<>]*>|\(Yesterday \d+:\d+ [AP]M\)/g, "");
}


function satis2(str) {
    var sum = 0;
    var dot = 0;
    var das = 0;

    // Foreach char, tally dotdash
    for (var i = 0; i < str.length; i++) {
        var bl = dnum(str.charAt(i));
        sum += bl[0];
        dot += bl[1];
        das += bl[2];
    }

    return [sum > 0, dot, das];
}

function satis3(str) {
    str = letextract(str);

    var mus = '';
    var c = '';

    for (var i = 0; i < str.length; i++) {
        var ch = str[i];

        // Nil state
        if (mus == '')
            mus += ch;

        // a
        else if (mus[0] == 'a') {
            // ac af
            if (strhas('cf', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='acf'||mus=='afc')return mus; else mus=ch;}
            // a
            else if(mus.length==1)mus=strhas('cf',ch)?mus+ch:ch;}

        // b
        else if (mus[0] == 'b') {
            // bd bg
            if (strhas('dg', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='bdg'||mus=='bgd')return mus;else mus=ch;}
            // b
            else if(mus.length==1)mus=strhas('dg',ch)?mus+ch:ch;}

        // c
        else if (mus[0] == 'c') {
            // ca cf
            if (strhas('af', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='caf'||mus=='cfa')return mus;else    mus=ch;}
            // ce cg
            else if (strhas('eg', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='ceg'||mus=='cge')return mus;else mus=ch;}
            // c
            else if(mus.length==1)mus=strhas('afeg',ch)?mus+ch:ch;}

        // d
        else if (mus[0] == 'd') {
            // db dg
            if (strhas('bg', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='dbg'||mus=='dgb')return mus;else mus=ch;}
            // d
            else if(mus.length==1)mus=strhas('bg',ch)?mus+ch:ch;}

        // e
        else if (mus[0] == 'e') {
            // ec eg
            if (strhas('cg', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='ecg'||mus=='egc')return mus;else mus=ch;}
            // e
            else if(mus.length==1)mus=strhas('cg',ch)?mus+ch:ch;}

        // f
        else if (mus[0] == 'f') {
            // fc fa
            if (strhas('ca', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='fca'||mus=='fac')return mus;else mus=ch;}
            // f
            else if(mus.length==1)mus=strhas('ca',ch)?mus+ch:ch;}

        // g
        else if (mus[0] == 'g') {
            // gd gb
            if (strhas('db', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='gdb'||mus=='gbd')return mus;else    mus=ch;}
            // gc ge
            else if (strhas('ce', mus[1])){mus+=ch;if(mus=='gce'||mus=='gec')return mus;else mus=ch;}
            // g
            else if(mus.length==1)mus=strhas('bcde',ch)?mus+ch:ch;}
        else
            mus = ch;
    }

    return mus;

}

function letextract(str) {
    var list = str.match(/\b\w/g);

    if (list == null)
        return '';

    str = "";
    for (var i = 0; i < list.length; i++)
        str += list[i];

    return str.toLowerCase();
}

function strhas(str, char) {
    return str.indexOf(char) != -1;
}

function dnum(char) {
    var dot = 0;
    var das = 0;

    for (var i = 0; i < DITS.length; i++)
        if (DITS[i].indexOf(char) != -1)
            dot = i+1;

    for (var i = 0; i < DAHS.length; i++)
        if (DAHS[i].indexOf(char) != -1)
            das = i+1;

    return [dot - das, dot, das];
}

function tos2(bl) {
    var out = '';

    out += bl[0] ? "PASSES" : "FAILS";
    out += " 2";
    out += " with "+bl[1]+" dots and ";
    out += bl[2]+" dashes.<br>";

    return out;
}

function tos3(bl) {
    var out = '';

    out += bl.length == 3 ? "PASSES" : "FAILS";
    out += " 3";
    out += " had "+bl.toUpperCase()+"<br>";

    return out;
}

function scan() {
    var posts = $('.post_body');

    // For each post
    for (var i = 0; i < posts.length; i++) {
        var iht = posts[i].innerHTML;
        var output = "";

        var siht = sanitize(iht);

        output += tos2(satis2(siht));
        output += tos3(satis3(siht));

        posts[i].innerHTML = iht.concat("<code><br>"+output+"</code>");
    }
}

scan();

/*Rules:

Rule 1: "Secret" - Post must contain a secret or be a secret.
Rule 2: "Graph" - Post must have more dots than lines. Judged via script.
Rule 3: "Euphonic" - Post must have words that begin with consecutive musical notes (A through G) that form a major triad.
Rule 4: "Yes" - Post must agree with at least one statement in the previous post and provide a reason regardless of veracity.
Rule 5: "Hell" - Post must describe a hell. A hell must have a punishment and a condition of entry.
*/