Post making contest 1.0

Is said post shorter than five characters (including tags)?

Because you can't make a post that's shorter than that.

Not quite.

This post violates rules 1 and 4.

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SpoilerWhat about this post?

This post violates rules 4 and 5.

Sruix, if you're wanting to go to bed, you're gonna have to start giving out hints.

And your rules better not have any "If...else" statements or so help me...

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Spoiler

This post violates rules 1, 2, 3, 4 and 5, though any sane person who hadn't been forced to overthink rule 5 way too many times these past hours would probably not think so.

(I'm going to bed in about ten minutes anyway, so along with the above, which is a terrible hint, here's another: bar my very first "this is post #1" post, all other posts I have made during this ruleset up to now satisfy rule 1 except #211 - they also all violate rule 4, and this is extremely unlikely to change)

EDIT: okay it really is too late I can't even give hints properly any more