You Are About 10 Seconds Away From Execution By Firing Squad

DEATHS 37-40

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Spoiler

Climb out of the window! Best course of action!

It's probably dangerous to stay around here, but going down the elevator isn't really an option.



So you decide to leave.



You've escaped. And luckily, it seems you managed to avoid triggering any security systems...



You are suddenly crushed by someone falling out of the sky. Maybe you picked the wrong place to stand.

BAD END
Reloading from last save...

>Jump up and down and cluck like a chicken while swinging the computer around like a flail.

You suddenly have the most brilliant idea ever.



This is clearly the most productive way you could be using your time.

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SpoilerFun fact: The above image is Panel 400.

However, you don't manage to get enough momentum with your flailing and drop the computer on your head.

BAD END
Reloading from last save...

>Say out loud, "I know you're watching me."

You announce to some unknown presence that you're aware their eyes are on you.



Hey, looks like your bluff worked!

> If someone responds to this, say, "No, not you, I mean the other one."

You decide to try it again, just in case.



The figure watching you is not amused.



He decides to get your attention.





...Maybe you should listen to what he has to say?

> Due to the Darth-Vader appearance that he had when he first showed up, he must be your father.
JOIN THE DARK SIDE AND USE THE FORCE TO DESTROY ALL THE FIRING SQUAD MEMBERS AND THE JUDGE/JURY/EXECUTIONER!

You tell him that you've decided to join him on the Dark Side.



Before he can respond, you run off to destroy your pursuers with your new powers.





Looks like the welcoming committee has a few new members.



But they are no match for the Dark Side of the Force!



Too bad you don't actually have that.

BAD END
Reloading from last save...

> Challenge your OTHER LONG-LOST BROTHER to a FACE-SLAPPING CONTEST!

You challenge him to a face-slapping contest.



Uh. You might have challenged him a little too hard.



You decide to move on and pretend nothing happened.





You have now gone back in time to meet with your past self. Something seems vaguely familiar about this, but you can't recall just what happened.



Oh. That's what. Man, your past self was a jerk. At least he'll get what's coming to him.

BAD END
Reloading from last save...

Challenge him to an EXTREME TAP-DANCE OFF!!

You challenge him to a tap-dancing contest.



"No."

Sloppy makeouts.

You decide to be a little friendlier.



But then you get the sudden feeling this may be a bad idea.

> Just listen to what he has to say, like a regular human being with socially-acceptable behavior.

"Are you done being an idiot yet? We don't have much time."



You decide to stop being an idiot and hear what he has to say.



"Right. I'm you, from a little bit into the future. The pocket watch you're carrying has the ability to travel through time when you wind it."



"But the thing is, that watch is actually from the future. The present version of the watch is in Grandma's office. She used its powers to acquire a vast fortune and buy the publishing company."



"You need to steal that watch, then give it to your past self before the firing squad comes for you. Then you need to come back here and tell yourself what I just told you. I'll explain how to use the watch properly in a moment, it's easy to get lost in time if you're not careful."



You now have the knowledge to use the Pocket Watch properly.



Your future self then returns to his own time.



Well, it looks like your next objective is to get the watch from your grandmother. But how will you find her office?