Respec(')

Get engaged to the Crocacutus.

NEVER. You firmly believe gay marriage is wrong, for reasons you'd really rather not go into right now. Probably because they all sound dumb when you try to list them.

Let's keep this Rated T for Teens, folks

> high school musical the crocactus.

Sorry, neither you nor the Crocacutus is peppy or non-threateningly attractive enough for such a gambit. Not even with the context's integrity shot to hell like it is.

Engage in verbal confrontation with Crocacutus.

The last of your conceptually paper-thin comrades jumps in the hole. Trust me, you're not missing anything if we never got to know them. One was fat, one was sassy, yadda yadda yadda.

That just leaves you facing your foe. He beckons you toward the chasm, but you don't budge. You think you can see some sign of worry in his eyes, but you're not really sure how reptiles emote.

You: Yo, dude, what the hell?
Crocacutus: Get over that jump, you maggot, or I'll have you cleaning latrines for a week!
You: Well, one of us will have to, now that you killed everyone else! Oh, also, I don't think that timer bar is going to last for anything like a week.

The Crocacutus is initially shocked that you recognized what's going on, then looks crestfallen with the revelation.

Crocacutus: Oh. Players usually aren't aware of montages as they happen. I thought I was the only one who realized what was going on.
You: Nice try, buddy. So why'd you want to kill me so badly?
Crocacutus: You were the one who wanted to turn me into part of your wardrobe! I was scared! You know how many friends I've had turned into boots and handbags by you players?

Well jeez, that makes you feel kind of bad. You always thought the monsters were procedurally generated shortly after you arrived in the adventuring area. Still, you really want that CRODPIECE. You are trapped in a dilemma. What will you say?