Introductions: The Inauguraling

I'm that guy who was too busy LIVING IT UP ON HOLIDAY (LIVING IT UP ™ may or may not include the following: sweating, carrying mountains of shopping for family members, dining finely, desperately coaxing an ancient Mac on a mainland Chinese internet connection to comply, hugging dog) to get in here when it first went up~

But then some guy came up to me with a broken bottle and told me to get into the van and now I guess I'm here.