Loather Dating Sim

>put coldblooded's book in the toaster and turn it on

you can't. coldblooded is still in the forest

> Rocky training montage

this isn't youtube

easy

Oh that sounds pretty good. I unplug the toaster and retrieve the book so that I can process the information within.

you are nowhere near the toaster. you do read the book though

for a successful date it is best to eat rats

is this a helpful tip?? you decide

i walk in and take the book from coldblooded, inserting it into the now-plugged-in toaster. To show him how reading is REALLY done.

Toaster is set to "nuclear bombardment". I press on.

no you don't, and i'm pretty sure that's against international law

give loather a gentle pat on the head

all is well in the world. i am content

I smash the toaster.

you're still in the forest!

I implode. None can pass down my legacy now. See what you've done

you implode, but only halfway. you are now tiny

I send her a message through a messaging system. It reads: "Would you like to try dates with me, try dating me, or possibly both things at the same time? Unrelated, check out this picture of a puppy eating a watermelon
"

i reply "definitely, but only if you prove your worth by sending me 20 more dogs"

i'm roleplaying as the roof on loather's house.

>creak in the wind

you do an excellent job of this, everyone thinks the roof is creaking

>tell loather that she looks like a gecko

i am now thoroughly owned

>be Mraof

only mraof can be mraof!

>be fuck you trol

fuck you trol isn't real.

> Mraof: Pet a gecko like that evil guy who pets his cat in inspector gadget

this is now the Mraof Supervillainy sim

you can't tell mraof what to do!

i do loather's laundry for her

mirdini notices you pulling dirty clothes out of their pockets. you both make eye contact

I undo loather's laundry. For her.

Sorry loather I'm afraid you'll have to get a whole new wardrobe. I suggest this.

Yes, just a head.

mirdini and chwoka notice you grabbing clothes out of their pockets. all three of you make eye contact

>open door
>get on floor
>walk the dinosaur

the door was already open, so you fail to walk the dinosaur. nobody is impressed