Iconoclasm

Chapter One: Adventures in Tolerance

In the inaugural session, the cultlings spent a lot of time getting to know one another (and, primarily, their dietary preferences) to the increasing dismay of Master Leona. After establishing that Zed would not, in fact, eat a tree if given the opportunity and that Leona doesn't have any books to help Evangeline know how to vampire, the group realizes that their commanders have assumed that Tiliwo still has access to a naval vessel; this proves untrue, and a lengthy discussion about the logistics of stealing a boat and acquiring blood slaves ensues. There is surprisingly little compunction about the prospect of abducting someone unimportant to serve as a larder for Evangeline and a great deal of enthusiasm for all the punching that will probably ensue. Eventually the conversation turns back to Leona's offer to send a fifth initiate with the group, and they settle on Klein as a complement to the temperament and general nonmagicality of its current composition.

The dwarf is fetched, the secret of dwarven blood is revealed, and everyone heads off to Maras to do crimes. It is unanimously decided that the better idea is to ignore the road and follow the river through the woods because it'll be faster. There is some debate over the existence of owlbears, which naturally attracts... some sort of anticlimactic slime monster. Nanda will have to settle for punching an owl and a bear at a later date. The battle ends with Evangeline and Nanda glued together, one half of the blob hallucinating vividly, and the other half of it magically imprisoned. After freeing his arm, Nanda promptly traps it again by attempting to punch the spellbound blob. Team Cult eventually decides not to finish the stupid thing off and leaves.

They bed down for the night, are interrupted by a group of Consolation Peasants, and do not murder anyone.

Eventually, the crew reaches Maras late at night. They are briefly stymied by an unlocked gate, but proceed to case some boats before getting a room at a nearby tavern. Zed shares his gift with another patron, which nearly gets him killed; afterwards, Zed and Klein retire while Tiliwo works on a revolutionary design for an engine made of trash. Nanda finds the fanciest boat possible, while Evangeline skulks off to get her feed on. She does this by attempting to drain a drunk in an alley behind a church, and is promptly interrupted by a priest. Narrowly avoiding discovery of her true nature, she legs it and heroically demonstrates her continued inability to sneak anywhere or roll below a 10 on anything.

Eventually sated, she meets back up with Nanda, where the two discover that the guards have been summoned to the tavern, presumably in response to Zed's generosity. What happens next? Tune in next time on Alternative Unlifestyle Choices to find out. Chapter Two starts Sunday, March First at 7:00AM PST.